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Is this marital property?

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  • Is this marital property?

    When we split up after 5 years of marriage, we agreed on the distribution of most household items (after difficult negotiation).


    One area of continuing dispute is the expensive Danby stoneware. Wife says that she will only split half of items given as wedding gifts which amounts to about $800. Collection built over 5 years in marriage accounts to more than $3500, which she claims was bought out of money given to her as a gift (ie. Birthday, anniversary, etc.). These aren't 'personal items' but used as dishes for the family.

    Are these dishes part of family property?

    I'm not even asking for half of the set (10 of everything incl serving dishes, etc.) I'd like a setting for four.

  • #2
    Are you effing kidding? Really???

    For the sake of answering your questions as asked, yes it's marital property, you are each entitled to half the value of it, not necessarily HALF of the damn dishes. Regardless of what monies she used to buy it, even if it had been inheritance money, as soon as she purchased items for the family home it was comingled and can no longer be excluded.

    For the sake of ending the stupidity: What the fuck is wrong with the two of you that you're fighting over dishes?? Do you really have NOTHING more important tofocus on?

    Perhaps if the two of you had spent as much time and effort working on your marriage then you wouldn't be in this situation. If your biggest issue is who gets the damn dishes, consider yourself extremely fortunate.

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    • #3
      blink is right. Why would you even want to fight to get half of a set of dishes??

      One of you takes the complete set and the other gets an item of equal value. Just remember that these are used dishes and what you paid for them is not necessarily what they are worth. Why split up the set unless its just a way for one person to stick it to the other.

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      • #4
        Well, if there are no kids and no dog, you have to find something to bicker over.

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        • #5
          LOL - the old movie co-starring Michael Douglas and Danny DiVito comes to mind. Can't remember the name of it but they were fighting over Staffordshire figurines.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by arabian View Post
            LOL - the old movie co-starring Michael Douglas and Danny DiVito comes to mind. Can't remember the name of it but they were fighting over Staffordshire figurines.
            wasnt that the "war of the roses" ??

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            • #7
              You're right. There are a lot of lessons to be learned in that old movie. Danny Divito started out by saying to be very generous [when referring to offers to settle in divorce]. Ironically it used to be one of my ex's favorite movies. We never had an argument about any household items and there was plenty to argue about after a 30 yr marriage. We decided the division of household contents in less than an hour. I merely asked him what he wanted and the next week it was all taken away by the movers. I guess it really wasn't important in the end. The only thing he mentioned to me one day in the elevator at the court house was "what did you do with the bbq - I could use it." I ended up leaving it with the house along with the piano for the people who bought it as I had no where to put it. There were plenty of things that he probably would have wanted but his girlfriend wouldn't let him talk to me at the time so I had little choice but to give things away.

              To this day I have a few dozen family photo albums. He has nothing to do with his son and probably never will. We have moved and the only contact we have is through lawyers now. I don't bother to go to court anymore (lawyer goes on my behalf) and my son and he have no contact whatsoever. Maybe someday, if he ever ends up with someone decent, he will change his mind and try to reconnect with his son and request the photo albums. Cest la vie.

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              • #8
                This is hilarious

                Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
                Are you effing kidding? Really???

                For the sake of answering your questions as asked, yes it's marital property, you are each entitled to half the value of it, not necessarily HALF of the damn dishes. Regardless of what monies she used to buy it, even if it had been inheritance money, as soon as she purchased items for the family home it was comingled and can no longer be excluded.

                For the sake of ending the stupidity: What the fuck is wrong with the two of you that you're fighting over dishes?? Do you really have NOTHING more important tofocus on?

                Perhaps if the two of you had spent as much time and effort working on your marriage then you wouldn't be in this situation. If your biggest issue is who gets the damn dishes, consider yourself extremely fortunate.
                I read the original post and your response Blink and I agree. You gave me the laugh for the week.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
                  Are you effing kidding? Really???
                  For the sake of ending the stupidity: What the fuck is wrong with the two of you that you're fighting over dishes?? Do you really have NOTHING more important tofocus on?
                  LOL! No doubt!

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                  • #10
                    lmao...sometimes when people like this divorce...its sooo obvious what the cause was.

                    Danby stonewear...ROFL!

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Pursuinghappiness View Post
                      lmao...sometimes when people like this divorce...its sooo obvious what the cause was.

                      Danby stonewear...ROFL!
                      I personally can't even believe the original poster posted that in there and I am still laughing over it.

                      I really think the poster is playing us.

                      ROFLMAO

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                      • #12
                        Maybe they can work out a week on/week off arrangement with the stonewear...with an every wednesday night switch so they can eat dinner off of it on the alt week.

                        They can put a clause in the Stonewear Plan which specifies they don't bad mouth each other in front of the small salad plate.

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                        • #13
                          Perfect! But wait.... what about the cutlery and stemware????

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                          • #14
                            I'm sorry everyone, but the poor poster is at his wits' end here. It's not about the dishes; they are just symptomatic of everything else that's going on in his negotiations. It sounds like his ex is doing everything she can to shortchange him in equalization. This is just the latest straw and the one that's breaking his back, and we're making fun of it. It's only petty to us because it's all we see.

                            She argues that she deserves more out of the set because she used personal money to purchase more of it. We all know this doesn't hold in court. He argues that he's not even after his fair half of the set.

                            We don't know if they are wasting lawyer time on this, but I hope not.

                            My advice would be to avoid breaking up the set, and let her keep it since it apparently means a lot to her that she would spend so much of her money adding to it. Then take something else from the home worth about $1700 instead. The big screen TV home theatre or something similar that she isn't as emotionally attached to.

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                            • #15
                              Rioe you have a point and I apologize to the OP for making a jab at his expense.

                              My advice is to split the set. Having recently inherited lots and lots of china I can tell you that the china he is talking about is pretty common and easily replaced.

                              I would split everything whenever possible and avoid the hassle of appraisals.

                              Comment

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