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  • Offer to Settle, then what?

    As most of you have felt the pain & aguish, I will make an attempt (as feeble as it may be) to make this as to the point as possible
    Travel ~1300 mi to attend Settlement Conf. All was going well, judge seemed fair, taking private time with both side, determining all concerns. While I was alone with him, he told me what he was going to recommend, although not all in my favor - I agreed it would be fair. At this point both parties are in front of the judge & before anything could be settle, the Applicants lawyer said she didn't feel well & court was adjourned. Nothing settled! (Snakes slithered out when all was not in their favor) I lost several days work, spent ~$1000 in rental cars/flights etc. Immediately after conference our lawyer drafted a doc. to the judge’s recommendations & presented to Applicant, in return we are presented with an Offer to settle that has none of the judge’s recommendations.
    Where do we go from here? Does it go to trial if we don't agree? How long do we have to reply? THX !

  • #2
    If you present a formal offer which the Applicant denies, and then the judge imposes something similar in a subsequent conference, then your ex might be on the hook for a fair chunk of your legal expenses. This is notoriously inconsistent, however, so don't rely on this. Make sure you have as much detailed information on your court-related expenses as possible. Keep all receipts, and make sure you request costs in all your filings.

    Barring all that, you may just be up a creek on the last conference.

    Make sure you counter her offer with a formal one of your own, and make sure it's as close to what the judge indicated he'd decide as possible. As for timetables of what needs filing and when, I'll leave that to some of the smarter people on here

    Comment


    • #3
      After all the expense it sure is unfortunate that court was adjourned on account of an ill lawyer! I've never heard that one before!

      If, as you say, the Judge's recommendations were reasonable and fair, it should come as no surprise that the doc your side presented was ignored and a more unfair Offer To Settle was presented. Your lawyer will know how long you have to respond.

      You don't have to agree. If your lawyers can't work it out you will have another case conference and if some of the issues are not on consent the Judge will rule. Hopefully you'll get the same judge that took the time to speak to you alone. That doesn't happen very often in my experience.

      Your CS will be adjusted to reflect your present income. Your sec 7 responsibilites will be sorted. Your access travel expense will probably remain yours.

      Your case will not go to trial until all other avenues have been exhausted. A trial would cost you upwards of $20 000. You will probably have many more case conferences which will cost you in the neighbourhood of $20 000 as well. It's not cheap to haggle thru lawyers. Best case scenario is that you and your Ex come to a fair Offer To Settle as soon as possible.

      I have been sitting in court two different times where an out of jurisdiction applicant/respondant was on speaker phone. I don't know the details on this procedure but make sure you know if you absolutley have to be present for everything in the flesh.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by danny boy View Post
        As most of you have felt the pain & aguish, I will make an attempt (as feeble as it may be) to make this as to the point as possible
        Travel ~1300 mi to attend Settlement Conf. All was going well, judge seemed fair, taking private time with both side, determining all concerns. While I was alone with him, he told me what he was going to recommend, although not all in my favor - I agreed it would be fair. At this point both parties are in front of the judge & before anything could be settle, the Applicants lawyer said she didn't feel well & court was adjourned. Nothing settled! (Snakes slithered out when all was not in their favor) I lost several days work, spent ~$1000 in rental cars/flights etc. Immediately after conference our lawyer drafted a doc. to the judge’s recommendations & presented to Applicant, in return we are presented with an Offer to settle that has none of the judge’s recommendations.
        Where do we go from here? Does it go to trial if we don't agree? How long do we have to reply? THX !
        It appears you're in limbo to move the matter forward.

        One needs an "order" for trial. Its not automatic. Write the previous Judge that presided at held Settlement Conference. Briefly outline the problem and ask that they remain seized for further Settlement Conference. Without any order to go - Trial is on hold.

        Comment


        • #5
          Thank all of you for your words of wisdom.
          Yes, this awesome judge told us he would be available to us, & follow this case through. He also indicated that further interactions could be handled over the phone.
          Personally, we have had poor luck with the teleconference. Actually, it was more our lawyer letting us down & signing an order on our behalf without us seeing it first. Being so ignorant to the process, we were blind sighted by many things. My opinion (& it’s just that), not showing up put one behind the eight ball from the commencement of the session. It could be falsely misconstrued as not caring enough to show up, etc… Although in our present case, we have met the judge & the foundation has been laid. We hope...
          Thanks again

          Comment


          • #6
            What is your thinking of this...
            As indicated previously, attended the settlement conference - nothing was settled. We never had an agreement on CS. Although (until this settlement conf.) I have been paying an amount my ex & I came up with.
            Now it's time to pay CS & I ask my lawyer "Do I pay her the amount I had been paying her or the amount the judge indicated was fair (~$70 less, than I had been paying). Lawyer said don't pay anything until you receive an order, & contacted by Family Responsibility Office. His rational was this: my paying her directly, may not be noted. Now I have not paid for 2 months (personally not feeling good about that..). Is this what usually happens? Will I be required to make back payments with interest, when this gets settled?

            Comment


            • #7
              You should pay the CS you agreed to with your ex until a new agreement is reached. Anything else is not right, don't blame your lawyer, you are in charge, listen to your gut. Pay the back CS owed, make sure you do it by a cheque that says 'CS payment for [month]', and apologize to your ex.

              If you are going through FRO, I don't know about that, but make sure she gets the payment.

              Comment


              • #8
                I think your lawyer is trying to say that you never had an order so technically you don't 'officially' owe CS. Maybe your lawyer thinks if your Ex is not getting paid she will come to an agreement sooner. Is it your lawyers rationale that it is a bargaining chip to move things along?

                You can bet that in negotiations your Ex wil state she never had CS for a certain period of time and you'll be ordered to pay her the missed months and be frowned upon for non-payment. I would be putting some money aside because getting into arrears is a hard thing to climb out of.

                The only logical reason to NOT pay CS directly is because there IS an order being processed by FRO and it would mess up the payment plan and arrears that they are sorting out.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Thanks Suchislife, felt quite poorly after billm reply. I never wanted it to come to this, & these issues have been going on 1.5 yrs now. When your lawyer tells you something, one believes it is what one is to do...
                  Yes, I believe that is my lawyers rational, as we supplied my financials to the Applicant last June & it took the court system (apparently after a given time being dormant issuses must be dealt with one way or another.) to get them to initiate a Settlement Conf. I believe the Applicant had no desire to rock the boat when she was getting ~$70 over the guidelines.
                  THX

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Any options? 16 mnths & counting post Settlement Conf. (almost post SC)

                    It has been 16 months since we visited the Judge & ALMOST had the issues settled - if it had not been for the ailing applicants lawyers. It has been 16 months of "reinventing the wheel" & futilely jostling papers back & forth to the Applicant with no settlement in sight. Most recently, Amended minutes were sent in or around 3 months ago, with no response. The Applicant continues to successfully keep us from seeing our child in our home – a visit that was to happen in the fall of 2009 (as recommended by Judge - not in writing - as the settlement conference ended prematurely) & another in the spring of 2010. Seriously, are we this submissive to the Applicant?

                    Do we need to draft a letter pleading to Judge for an intervention & assistance with closure?

                    We implore any measures you can advise to get this settled.

                    Any insight would be greatly appreciated! THX

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Tell your lawyer to book another court date as passing settlement offers back and forth is doing nothing. You should be paying either table amounts of support or OFFSET amounts of support, depending on the amount of time you have the children.

                      If you are being denied access to your children without cause, and are trying to get 40% time or more...then in the absence of an actual order...pay offset amounts (but bank the rest!).

                      Comment

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