Bank Accounts

[FB_]

So part of our separation agreement was to split up the resp and the kids bank accounts.

In the spring I opened an RESP in my name only with both my kids (Family RESP) We had a kids account for each of them with money in them. Once the order was signed I took my half of the money out of their bank accounts and put it into my resp, as per our agreement The rest remained in the kids accounts for her to do as she pleased.

Ex went to the bank yesterday to open new accounts for the kids and was stonewalled. Apparently it had something to do with their addresses which was my house (Matrimonial home).

I got several threatening emails that she was changing the kids banking addresses to her new house. The bank told her the kids can only have one address (which i'm confirming...I work for the bank)

I just want to know what others have done.

I totally know the simple answer is for one of us to go to a different bank. I obviously won't being staff and she won't because she is difficult.

Looking for suggestions. I have a call into my personal banker to look for a solution.

[Rioe]

Switch to piggy banks at each house? How much cash do your kids have saved up? Is it really worth the hassle of proper bank accounts at this point? How old does a child have to be before they can have their own bank account with any address they choose to provide?

[blinkandimgone]

Regardless of how old they are, they can't just 'pick an address'. You'll note that when you sign any papers at the bank, you are swearing to the autheticity of the information and it is illegal to provide false information, whether she does it or they do it.

She can try to change the kids' addresses with the bank if she has her own accounts for them, but unless you've given her access to the children's current accounts, there is NO way she shoujld be able to have them change the information on your accounts for them.

[FB_]

Switch to piggy banks at each house? How much cash do your kids have saved up? Is it really worth the hassle of proper bank accounts at this point? How old does a child have to be before they can have their own bank account with any address they choose to provide?

They have around $1000. They also have piggy banks at home (my house anyway)

That's the whole issue which address. Our agreement states

<kids> Address on all legal documents shall remain as the Matrimonial Home for ease of school registration and registration of extracurricular activities.

[Rioe]

Regardless of how old they are, they can't just 'pick an address'. You'll note that when you sign any papers at the bank, you are swearing to the autheticity of the information and it is illegal to provide false information, whether she does it or they do it.

Okay, I didn't mean pick any old address. I meant picking between one of their parents' addresses.

[FB_]

I got the following email back from her

I am changing the addresses because I don't trust you or the bank! My advisor told me that they can't ideally guarentee that you will not recieve paper because their address is under your home! Please don't threaten me with the agreement relating to changing their addresses! The agreement states the children must have the matrimonial address for school puurposes and extracurricular like hockey because it best suites you and your control issues about everything rotating around having things done in peel. I have gone up and beyond regarding this issue. The agreement does not state that the children who I will remind you live in orangeville as well. I will be changing their addresses to orangeville at the bank. Why don't you open their new accounts with another bank! Thanks!

Reality check time.

Am I being an ass by following our agreement. Am I interpreting the agreement correctly. By changing their address the kids accounts that I opened and have signing authority over will now be her address.

I told her she could open an account at a different bank and this would solve the issue. Again I work for the bank in question so I'm not about to take my business elsewhere.

She is right it is a control issue. She is going to at some point attempt to register the kids for school in Orangeville IMO. I agreed to her moving to Orangeville and 50/50 with the understanding that all school and extra curricular activities remain in Brampton as it was her choice to move there.

Again please give your opinions on what you would do.

Thanks

[Pursuinghappiness]

First of all, I'm confused as to why the bank would agree to change their addresses to her address anyway.

See Blink's post

Regardless of how old they are, they can't just 'pick an address'. You'll note that when you sign any papers at the bank, you are swearing to the autheticity of the information and it is illegal to provide false information, whether she does it or they do it.

She can try to change the kids' addresses with the bank if she has her own accounts for them, but unless you've given her access to the children's current accounts, there is NO way she shoujld be able to have them change the information on your accounts for them.

She can go into the bank and TRY to change their addresses but she has no authority by which to do so...especially if you set-up the accounts and have signing authority.

If you work at the bank, ask them their policy. At the least, I'd imagine she'll be given a form that you'd have to sign. So just don't sign it. Having a vagina doesn't mean that she can just walk in and do this unless your bank has some very bizarre practices.

After you do that, you can send one simple message saying that you will honor the current agreement regarding the kid's addresses and simply ignore any future communication on the issue.

By the way: After she heads to the bank again and figures out she can't willy-nilly change the addresses...enjoy those messages...they should be extremely amusing because (no offense) your ex's wheel is still turning but the hamster is definitely dead.

[DowntroddenDad]

Personally, I would stick to your guns.

She is free to open accounts for them in Orangeville. Don't teach her that you will just fold if she screams loud enough.

[Pursuinghappiness]

By the way, if her concern is that she wants copies of the bank statements, you could just offer to send a copy with one of the kids on exchange day when you receive them in the mail.

[FB_]

Personally, I would stick to your guns.

She is free to open accounts for them in Orangeville. Don't teach her that you will just fold if she screams loud enough.

So that's the thing. I have account with my kids and their addresses are here.

She is going to open NEW accounts in Orangeville. However the address is per customer not account and a customer can have only one address.

I do know they wouldn't release any cash to her without the separation agreement.

That's the thing.... All the kids id with an address is my address. Although I guess that's limited to their health card. Nothing else has an address.

[FB_]

By the way, if her concern is that she wants copies of the bank statements, you could just offer to send a copy with one of the kids on exchange day when you receive them in the mail.

That's the stupid thing.

They charge for statements, which I don't pay for as staff. Her account could be setup as paperless and only she would be able to see them on her online banking. I would not be able to see it because the account would not be attached to my profile.

She has been trying everything to get something in her address. She made me aware of this before we settled to I made sure to put this in the agreement. Which she signed willingly and with counsel.

The banker I spoke to said we could each open an account with our own signing authority so neither would have access to the other. All statements could be paperless and viewable only on our own online banking.

This is not acceptable to her.

I replied saying if she disagreed she could pursue section 5 "dispute resolution" in our agreement.

[FB_]

I also told her she could open accounts for the kids at another bank and I wouldn't interfere in any way.

[Rioe]

I would send a polite response that you feel changing their existing bank accounts is unnecessary confusion, especially since you work there, but that you encourage her to open new accounts for them at a new bank of her choice in her town, and you will be happy to sign whatever documentation is necessary to facilitate that, as well as the transfer of the balances, as per your separation agreement.

If she is unable to do so because their ID has your address on it (though I can't imagine that will come up), you can just shrug and say, "What an unexpected consequence of our agreement. Oh well. We tried."

She's just having a hard time letting go of arguing with you, I think. Any time she has any trouble with anything kid-related, it's going to be All Your Fault.

[Pursuinghappiness]

The banker I spoke to said we could each open an account with our own signing authority so neither would have access to the other.

Well since you already have this with the existing accounts, problem solved...lol...just ignore her.

If she is unable to do so because their ID has your address on it (though I can't imagine that will come up), you can just shrug and say, "What an unexpected consequence of our agreement. Oh well. We tried."

I agree although the kids are little so this won't even be an issue since they probably won't ask for their ID and even if they did...they pretty much only have a birth cert at this point and that doesn't have any address on it. She can just supply her own.

The only reason this might be a problem is that I'm not sure that you can open more than one RESP in any one child's name.

[ottawa_divorce_dad]

Well since you already have this with the existing accounts, problem solved...lol...just ignore her.



I agree although the kids are little so this won't even be an issue since they probably won't ask for their ID and even if they did...they pretty much only have a birth cert at this point and that doesn't have any address on it. She can just supply her own.

The only reason this might be a problem is that I'm not sure that you can open more than one RESP in any one child's name.

I don't believe this is accurate. Any number of people can open separate RESPs with the same child as a beneficiary. (Think grandparents, separated / divorced mom and dad etc). When contributions go into the account and ahead with a claim for the CESG contributions for the govt, they will only contribute up to the maximum permitted and hopefully in order of who contributed first in the calendar year. Ex if dad contributed the max amount in order to get max CESG in Jan, then when mom or anyone else contributes say in September, they would not see the CESG grant into their accounts.