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  • Exclusive Possession of Marital Home

    Even though I own the marital home, my 2bx has refused request for order of exclusive possession of the marital home. His lawyer stated this in a letter to my former lawyer. Do I need his consent? He has been physically and mentally abusive.

  • #2
    Did you own it before you got married?The house would be added to the assets and no doubt subject to equalization.It doesn't matter to the courts what he did to you unless you are looking for a restraining order.Im no expert but you should be able to sell the house....and have the money held pending equalization.Are there marital debts in both your names?Does he hold assets in his sole name?Think you need to elaborate a little bit more and there should be someone here to help figure this out.

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    • #3
      Murphy is correct

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      • #4
        If you are married, paper ownership of the matrimonial home is less important than its designation as the matrimonial home.

        He has indicated that he will not consent to being removed. Ask your lawyer to bring a motion for exclusive possession of the matrimonial home. If he has been abusive the police are an excellent resource for personal safety.

        Edit: He can refuse to give consent and, without his consent, you will need an Order.
        Last edited by OrleansLawyer; 08-10-2012, 05:32 PM. Reason: edit for clarity

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        • #5
          I have ownership of the house because that's what he wanted. In case his businesses failed, we wouldn't lose the house. We have debts but they could be easily paid. He has large sums of money in bank accounts solely in his name.

          Orleanslawyer, sorry I didn't make myself clear...he did move out after a letter from my lawyer. I'm now residing in the home. He was afraid of getting involved again with the police because of the abuse I'm sure. He is a very well known business man here.

          What I am wondering about, (while my lawyer is on vacation), is why would my husband feel he has authority to refuse an Order of exclusive possession of the home? I would like to have this as I'd have a better sense of security, especially since he wants more things out of the home even after he took a huge amount of things, large furniture, most of the antiques, etc. Even some of my personal things, like my brand new dresses never worn. Hmmm...
          Last edited by caranna; 08-10-2012, 07:06 PM. Reason: Edited for clarification

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          • #6
            Originally posted by caranna View Post
            I have ownership of the house because that's what he wanted. In case his businesses failed, we wouldn't lose the house. We have debts but they could be easily paid. He has large sums of money in bank accounts solely in his name.

            Orleanslawyer, sorry I didn't make myself clear...he did move out after a letter from my lawyer. I'm now residing in the home. He was afraid of getting involved again with the police because of the abuse I'm sure. He is a very well known business man here.

            What I am wondering about, (while my lawyer is on vacation), is why would my husband feel he has authority to refuse an Order of exclusive possession of the home? I would like to have this as I'd have a better sense of security, especially since he wants more things out of the home even after he took a huge amount of things, large furniture, most of the antiques, etc. Even some of my personal things, like my brand new dresses never worn. Hmmm...
            the problem is you do not have an order, all you have is a letter written to him from your lawyer and your lawyer cannot issue an order.

            Your ex doesnt have to do anything he wants to do, that is why you will have to take him to court and get an order.

            I know it sucks that he is being unreasonable but unfortunatly there is not much you can do unless he agrees or you take him to court.

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            • #7
              Standing is correct... you have no more right to that home than he does. It is considered mat property so if he wanted to he could move back in. If you want to secure the house, you need an order, a letter from your lawyer, is just that... a letter from your lawyer.

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              • #8
                Thanks. On his net worth statement, he put the entire value of the house as my property. I really didn't want this and did tell my previous lawyer about it. I had thought that we would equally divide the house value between us. Even if the house was divided equally, he would still owe me.

                I know why he is doing this...he wants to increase my assets so that he can save his bank accounts. He's also not being forthcoming with his assets, values of household items, etc. etc., and is lying about property that was stolen over 2 years ago. He has the stolen property listed as being in my possession, even though his lawyer knows better and I have the proof it was stolen.

                Oh well, it's all in part of the game I suppose. I hope my lawyer will not be too "nice" with him. I'm tired of being nice. It's not getting me anywhere.

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                • #9
                  It is considered mat property so if he wanted to he could move back in.
                  Matrimonial property is a misnomer. There are no property rights coming from a marriage; only an obligation for value arising from equalization of property and, in the case of the matrimonial home, a right of possession against the spouse on title.

                  On his net worth statement, he put the entire value of the house as my property.
                  If the house is in your name then that is correct; it is your property.

                  I know why he is doing this...he wants to increase my assets so that he can save his bank accounts.
                  If half the value of the house is attributed to him, you would either have to buy out his share or sell the house and split the proceeds. If you are going to sell the house anyways, you can pocket the money from the sale rather than half going to him and you collecting it back through equalization.

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                  • #10
                    Always get orders and don't waste your time many letters between the lawyers. They usually amount to nothing. The only usefulness they have is to show that you made and offer to settle from time to time.

                    Be sure to get a large interim order for spousal support - a large one at that. This will keep a fire under his butt and hopefully keep him from stalling.

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                    • #11
                      OrleansLawyer,

                      Thanks so much for your clarifications. I had thought about the advantages of having sole possession, and am much more comfortable with it rather than him having 1/2...it's just another tie to him I'd have to break.

                      I'm so appreciative of your advice and that of others on this forum. It's invaluable, priceless.

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                      • #12
                        Arabian, What is the difference between an order and a motion? I just researched these terms and am still not sure if they apply to the issues discussed here.

                        I'm all too familiar with those lawyer letters...for awhile his and my lawyers' letters would fly back and forth weekly. My lawyer was civil while his lawyers' letters were so nasty they were like a knife through my heart. They always seemed to be sent on Fridays. It was my to be ex's fix for the weekend.

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                        • #13
                          Order is something signed by the judge - the real deal

                          Motion is what you submit asking the judge for something. Hopefully a motion becomes an order.

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