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  • #31
    Originally posted by SSlang View Post
    Hi. Thanks again for the words of advice. I have reached out to my EAP and I have a free counseling session next week. I also talked with some coworkers as they kind of sensed that something has been off with me. My manager has expressed concern but I haven't told him anything.

    I also texted some of the mom's in my area whom I chat to when picking up my kids from daycare. They have been very kind and I text with one mom quite a lot.

    I've been smiling and been really chatty lately at home, especially in front of the kids. My husband has been ignoring me but I continue to keep up my attitude.

    Thank you again and take care.
    its the whole fake it till you make it. If you keep try to keep a sunny attitude no matter how you feel, eventually it will be easier.

    I am not sure if the whole thing about trying to get possession of the house due to his affair would fly. If you bring it up in an argument then that isn't cruelty on his part IMHO. You say he texts her right in front of you, how do you know that?? Does he tell you or do you check his phone? Lots of people unfortunately have affairs and in fact I think there was a poster a few years ago where he was living in the basement and his ex had her bf coming over in the top part of the house where she was living. I don't think there was anything he could do about it but I am fuzzy on the details.

    Look at it this way, he will probably cheat on her and if karma works it will be with a friend of hers that she introduced him to.

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    • #32
      If your relationship begins with adultery, the one thing you know for dead sure about your partner is that s/he is willing to cheat on his/her partner. This never ends well, no matter how infatuated the partners are at the beginning.

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      • #33
        Originally posted by arabian View Post
        Adultery and mental cruelty (him blatantly bragging about EA and rubbing it in your face) sets you up nicely for exclusive possession of the matrimonial home. If you have irrevocable proof of the EA then bring the evidence to your lawyer and instruct him to file for an immediate motion for exclusive possession. You and your children shouldn't have to live this nightmare.
        That only works if the ex is doing it to be cruel. If they are arguing and the OP insults her STBX in some way, and he retaliates with comments about the affair, then it is all in the course of an argument and as such have no impact on a request for exclusive possession.

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        • #34
          yes - probably comes down to a judge's interpretation of "cruelty"; I don't think I'd want to be her STBX and leave things to judge's discretion. If kids are at any way exposed to this then I believe the OP could be successful in obtaining temporary exclusive possession of the matrimonial home. If I were her I'd file for that as well as an Order for immediate sale of home as well.

          Parties play "nice" with each other or the gloves can come off.

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