I am new to this forum, and must say that it is excellent. I wish I had this resource when I was going through my separation 7 years ago.
To provide some history, after a very long (2+ years) litigation, EX and I finally settled the day before trail was to begin. The arrangement was joint custody, 50/50 access, and a provision for child support fixed at a specific value for a duration of 5 years to offset an un-equal division of assets. That order was later amended on consent & independent legal counsel so that child support be redirected to the child's RESP and expenses. In essence, ex pays very little, receives all tax and social benefits, and I cover all child care costs, and any excess monies go directly to the child's RESP for post-secondary education.
Now ex brings a motion forward, trying to re-open up all financial details in order to get more money and lump sum payments by trying to get retro-active child support, which was agreed to by way of a consentual court order.
I have some specific questions if anybody might want to chime in, since I am really stressed about this. I have considered going self-represented for some of these motions.
1) The Motion to Change was served prematurely; there was a clause in the original court order that no motion or application could be brought forward w/respect to CS until a certain date. EX has ignored this (as she does most items in the Court Order) and issued a motion a few months prior to that date.
On this basis, I was considering asking for a Procedural Motion to dismiss the application, ask for costs, on the basis that it is contrary to an existing order. Ex never asked for financial details (they have now been provided) and her and her counsel have not attempted to negotiate anything thus far, they started first with litigation.
Does that sound like a reasonable first step? Any feelings about the likelihood of success? My thought is that this would be relatively simple and I could be self represented.
2. I am fairly confident that no CS would be awarded retro-actively given it is clearly stated in the Order that this was meant to offset a division of assets.
3. I know that my agreement is un-conventional, where EX receives no money directly and on this basis she likely has a case. This was done to reduce acrimony, done on consent, and done with independent legal counsel (for which I paid). The reality is based on our incomes, I am already paying above child support guidelines, so effectively the only change she is requesting is that money is paid directly to her and she will do what she sees fit, she also wants me to just sign over the existing RESP to do as she pleases.
4. When we separated, my EX was very aggressive and played ALOT of games. Since the final order, she hasn't been much better. Most of this motion contains false allegations and arguments that simply are not true and for which I have concrete proof are lies and fabrication. She refuses to co-operate and follow the existing order (such as meeting with a parent-coordinator), alienates me from my child, and does her best to alienate him from my family. When we separated, the Judge told her quite simply that if this matter when to trail, it would likely result in a sole-custody situation and it didn't look so good for her. I firmly believed in a joint custody arrangement, but I have regretted that decision ever since.
I often think when dealing with bullies, a strong defense is a strong offence, and if she is trying to re-open the Final Order, then all bets are off and it is my opportunity to correct problems and breaches to the order.
I'd love to hear people's thoughts on this.
Sincerely,
To provide some history, after a very long (2+ years) litigation, EX and I finally settled the day before trail was to begin. The arrangement was joint custody, 50/50 access, and a provision for child support fixed at a specific value for a duration of 5 years to offset an un-equal division of assets. That order was later amended on consent & independent legal counsel so that child support be redirected to the child's RESP and expenses. In essence, ex pays very little, receives all tax and social benefits, and I cover all child care costs, and any excess monies go directly to the child's RESP for post-secondary education.
Now ex brings a motion forward, trying to re-open up all financial details in order to get more money and lump sum payments by trying to get retro-active child support, which was agreed to by way of a consentual court order.
I have some specific questions if anybody might want to chime in, since I am really stressed about this. I have considered going self-represented for some of these motions.
1) The Motion to Change was served prematurely; there was a clause in the original court order that no motion or application could be brought forward w/respect to CS until a certain date. EX has ignored this (as she does most items in the Court Order) and issued a motion a few months prior to that date.
On this basis, I was considering asking for a Procedural Motion to dismiss the application, ask for costs, on the basis that it is contrary to an existing order. Ex never asked for financial details (they have now been provided) and her and her counsel have not attempted to negotiate anything thus far, they started first with litigation.
Does that sound like a reasonable first step? Any feelings about the likelihood of success? My thought is that this would be relatively simple and I could be self represented.
2. I am fairly confident that no CS would be awarded retro-actively given it is clearly stated in the Order that this was meant to offset a division of assets.
3. I know that my agreement is un-conventional, where EX receives no money directly and on this basis she likely has a case. This was done to reduce acrimony, done on consent, and done with independent legal counsel (for which I paid). The reality is based on our incomes, I am already paying above child support guidelines, so effectively the only change she is requesting is that money is paid directly to her and she will do what she sees fit, she also wants me to just sign over the existing RESP to do as she pleases.
4. When we separated, my EX was very aggressive and played ALOT of games. Since the final order, she hasn't been much better. Most of this motion contains false allegations and arguments that simply are not true and for which I have concrete proof are lies and fabrication. She refuses to co-operate and follow the existing order (such as meeting with a parent-coordinator), alienates me from my child, and does her best to alienate him from my family. When we separated, the Judge told her quite simply that if this matter when to trail, it would likely result in a sole-custody situation and it didn't look so good for her. I firmly believed in a joint custody arrangement, but I have regretted that decision ever since.
I often think when dealing with bullies, a strong defense is a strong offence, and if she is trying to re-open the Final Order, then all bets are off and it is my opportunity to correct problems and breaches to the order.
I'd love to hear people's thoughts on this.
Sincerely,
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