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  • Ex Wife hates new Wife

    Newly married, well, 5 years. Ex wife does not know ex wife in any capacity. Moved back to Canada after a work hiatus of two years. Brought new wife here...she is a teacher. Ex wife is furious and will not allow our son to be in new wife's presence and is exhibiting severe pas tenancies

    I have a strong legal defense that claims that ex cannot keep me from my son due to her own personal feelings about my new wife. She adamantly refuses to allow me to see my son due to my new wife. She is making up stories about my new wife. What can I do here, people? How is this possible that the word of a jealous ex can do this much harm?

  • #2
    Your lawyer is correct.

    You are allowed to associate with whomever you want, so long as those people don't pose a reasonable threat to the child.

    What does your court order/agreement provide for parenting time with you and the child? How old is the child?

    When you were out of the country, did you continue to exercise your parenting time?

    If you have a court order with a specified parenting time schedule, and the ex unilaterally denies access, you need to take them to court for contempt. You file for contempt and progressively ask for more penalties/changes. First you ask for makeup time and costs of action. The second time you file for contempt you ask for makeup time for lost parenting time, an enforcement order so the police can get the child and also costs. The third time you file for contempt you ask that custody be changed so that you are the custodial parent, failing that counseling for the child, increased parenting time, makeup time for lost parenting time, an enforcement order and costs of the action.

    But you need to advise your ex that you plan on exercising your parenting time, that they cannot unilaterally alter the court order. That should they refuse to provide you with the child for your parenting time, you will deem it a denial of your parenting time and will seek the appropriate remedy in court.

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    • #3
      Unless your new wife has a criminal background of child abuse/neglect, no, your ex-wife has no legal recourse to keeping the child away from you.

      That said, maybe if you could figure out WHY your ex is behaving this way, you could make some headway with her. From your brief description, it sounds like you left your son's life for several years, and now want back in as though you never abandoned him? I can see why your ex would be reluctant to give you access even if a new wife wasn't in the picture.

      Did you cheat on your ex-wife with this new partner? She could still be angry about that, and feeling that now your new wife is stealing her child just like she stole her spouse (you).

      Did you ignore the child in the past in favour of the new relationship? She could be worried that the child would feel like a third wheel and be emotionally hurt.

      Did you have no access for the entire time you were gone? You just gallivanted off out of the country and ignored your child? She could be feeling like you only want to see the child when it's easy for you, now that you have a new partner to help with childcare, and is trying to protect the child from being hurt. She could also be angry that she did the single mom thing for years without any help from you, and you only want to parent now because you have someone to help you.

      In other words, is her problem really with your new wife, or is it actually with you and she's just using the new wife as an excuse? Start by asking for access that would be just you and your son, and not involving your new wife. See how she reacts.

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      • #4
        Even if your wife is a pedophile, your ex-wife would have to PROVE she was a direct risk to your kids... so the bar is HIGH....

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