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  • Matrimonial Home question regarding mortagage payments after spouse moved out

    Here is my current situation,

    Husband has moved out and rented a townhouse, leaving me and our children in the matrimonial home. My living expenses are currently higher than his, as our mortgage payment is $700 more per month than his new house rental amount, and also his house rental INCLUDES utilities!

    Right now, we are in the process of getting our separation agreement done. So far we have been joining our paychecks together, and then leaving me enough money to pay the house bills, and then splitting the difference between us for gas money and groceries. I imagine he is using part of a bank loan right now to pay for part of his house rental.

    He is starting to ask about how we are going to start splitting fiances. All I told him was that eventually he will have to start making support payments to me. He makes almost double my salary. I will be getting spousal and child support. We are having 50/50 custody. In the end, according to the tables, we will both end up with approximately the same amount of money for net disposable income.

    Right now we both own the matrimonial home, and I am living here with the kids. Most likely, we will sell the home.

    *My question is:
    Up until we sell the home, am I responsible for all of the matrimonial home utilities, whereas we are BOTH responsible for half of the mortgage, taxes and insurance on the home?? How does this work, when I start receiving support payments from him? Does he give me the support payment PLUS half of the mortgage/taxes/insurance?

    Because to me it doesn't seem fair for me to be stuck here with the higher mortgage and both of us having the same NDI.

    Hopefully someone can explain to me how this works. Thank you!

  • #2
    Originally posted by Tawanda View Post
    Here is my current situation,

    Husband has moved out and rented a townhouse, leaving me and our children in the matrimonial home. My living expenses are currently higher than his, as our mortgage payment is $700 more per month than his new house rental amount, and also his house rental INCLUDES utilities!

    Right now, we are in the process of getting our separation agreement done. So far we have been joining our paychecks together, and then leaving me enough money to pay the house bills, and then splitting the difference between us for gas money and groceries. I imagine he is using part of a bank loan right now to pay for part of his house rental.

    He is starting to ask about how we are going to start splitting fiances. All I told him was that eventually he will have to start making support payments to me. He makes almost double my salary. I will be getting spousal and child support. We are having 50/50 custody. In the end, according to the tables, we will both end up with approximately the same amount of money for net disposable income.

    Right now we both own the matrimonial home, and I am living here with the kids. Most likely, we will sell the home.

    *My question is:
    Up until we sell the home, am I responsible for all of the matrimonial home utilities, whereas we are BOTH responsible for half of the mortgage, taxes and insurance on the home?? How does this work, when I start receiving support payments from him? Does he give me the support payment PLUS half of the mortgage/taxes/insurance?

    Because to me it doesn't seem fair for me to be stuck here with the higher mortgage and both of us having the same NDI.

    Hopefully someone can explain to me how this works. Thank you!
    NO he does not give you half of the mortgage/taxes/insurance once you have a separation agreement or support decree. He pays child support according to the table, and spousal support if you qualify(which is not automatic)

    The two of you will have to decide what to do about the house. The matrimonial home is split 50/50. You can try to buy him out, or you can agree to sell it and split the proceeds. But once the assets are divided, support begins and you are on your own to determine your lifestyle.

    Most couples go through a reset of their lifestyles when they divorce, for the obvious reason that they no longer have two incomes.

    Comment


    • #3
      Just wondering, what should happen in the meantime before we get the separation agreement? Would he still pay me the support table payments, BEFORE our separation agreement is in place?

      Right now we both own the home, it is in both of our names, so is he responsible for paying half of the mortgage and insurance? Both of our names are on the title. Is he responsible for paying half of the mortgage on this home until his name is no longer on the title?? Is that the defining factor of how long he will pay half???

      So I guess the idea is that, after the separation agreement is in place, if I have bought out his portion of the house, the title in is MY name only so I will pay the mortgage and insurance?
      Ie/I am wondering, as long as BOTH of our names are on the title of the mortgage will he be responsible for half of the payment of the mortgage and insurance on the matrimonial home? How does this work?

      What if our separation agreement is in place and we have decided to sell the house? I am responsible for paying the mortgage even though it is in both of our names? It doesn't really make sense that I would be stuck with the cost due to the fact that he moved out and essentially stuck me with living here.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Tawanda View Post
        Just wondering, what should happen in the meantime before we get the separation agreement? Would he still pay me the support table payments, BEFORE our separation agreement is in place?

        Right now we both own the home, it is in both of our names, so is he responsible for paying half of the mortgage and insurance? Both of our names are on the title. Is he responsible for paying half of the mortgage on this home until his name is no longer on the title?? Is that the defining factor of how long he will pay half???

        So I guess the idea is that, after the separation agreement is in place, if I have bought out his portion of the house, the title in is MY name only so I will pay the mortgage and insurance?
        Ie/I am wondering, as long as BOTH of our names are on the title of the mortgage will he be responsible for half of the payment of the mortgage and insurance on the matrimonial home? How does this work?

        What if our separation agreement is in place and we have decided to sell the house? I am responsible for paying the mortgage even though it is in both of our names? It doesn't really make sense that I would be stuck with the cost due to the fact that he moved out and essentially stuck me with living here.
        For spousal support, the onus is on you to prove you are entitled. There are many threads here on the board you should read, but in short, you have to show you sacrificed your career for his career, or for the family.

        He is under no obligation to pay table rates unless and until you have an agreement that says he does, or a court order.

        You both are responsible for the mortgage as both your names are on the title, and usually insurance and property taxes would also be included in that. The utilities would be your own responsibility. When his name isn't on the title, because you buy him out or sell the house, then he no longer has to pay mortgage, insurance or taxes on it.

        Understand that because you have the use of the house, and he does not, in some circumstanaces he could charge you occupational rent.

        Understand, you chose to stay there. You can if need be force him to sell. He can do the same to you.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Tawanda View Post
          Just wondering, what should happen in the meantime before we get the separation agreement? Would he still pay me the support table payments, BEFORE our separation agreement is in place?
          According to your initial post, you share custody. If that is the case, then you pay each other c/s. What that means in real life is you take the amount the high earning is supposed to pay to pay the lower earning spouse, and then subtract the amount the lower earning spouse from the higher amount, and the higher earning spouse pays that amount to the lower earning spouse.

          example using hypothetical numbers:

          He makes $100k. His c/s obligation is then $1000
          You make $50k. Your c/s obligation is $500

          1000-500=$500, which is what he would pay you in offset c/s.

          Right now we both own the home, it is in both of our names, so is he responsible for paying half of the mortgage and insurance? Both of our names are on the title. Is he responsible for paying half of the mortgage on this home until his name is no longer on the title?? Is that the defining factor of how long he will pay half???
          If he likes his credit, and for ease of numbers, he should continue to pay the mortgage. But as he is no longer residing there, insurance and all utilities would likely fall to you.

          As he no longer resides there, he can stop paying the mortgage. But it wouldn't make sense if that is going to kill his credit.

          So I guess the idea is that, after the separation agreement is in place, if I have bought out his portion of the house, the title in is MY name only so I will pay the mortgage and insurance?
          Ie/I am wondering, as long as BOTH of our names are on the title of the mortgage will he be responsible for half of the payment of the mortgage and insurance on the matrimonial home? How does this work?
          He is not obligated to continue to pay the mortgage. There is good reason for him to stop, but better reason to continue. So long as he is paying part of the mortgage, it entitles him to any growth in value in the house. If he stops, there is the valuation date at that point.

          As mentioned, there is also occupational rent you have to consider. You are living and have sole use of a place which you only own half of. You may want to look into issues relating to occupational rent.

          What if our separation agreement is in place and we have decided to sell the house? I am responsible for paying the mortgage even though it is in both of our names? It doesn't really make sense that I would be stuck with the cost due to the fact that he moved out and essentially stuck me with living here.
          Not sure what you mean here. If as part of equalization, the house has to be sold, the profit would be split accordingly. Unless you buy him out of the house, he is entitled to 1/2 of the profit from the sale.

          And as mentioned, spousal support is not a guarantee. Just because he makes 2x as much as you do, doesn't mean you are entitled. There are two ways to be entitled, compensatory (you sacrificed your career for the benefit of the family) and non-compensatory (he makes A LOT more then you). In both cases, you have to prove entitlement, unless he otherwise agrees.

          Comment


          • #6
            Thanks Hammerdad for your response.

            Here was my question,
            Right now we both own the home, it is in both of our names, so is he responsible for paying half of the mortgage and insurance? Both of our names are on the title. Is he responsible for paying half of the mortgage on this home until his name is no longer on the title?? Is that the defining factor of how long he will pay half???

            What I meant was this. So I should probably decide as soon as possible whether I would like to sell the house? Then, in the separation agreement we would state we are selling the house. The house title would be under both of our names until it is sold?? H would start making support payments to me. On top of that does he also contribute half of the mortgage monthly amounts until the house is sold? Or do I pay it with my support payment.

            I apologize in advance if I am not making any sense.

            I guess the bottom line of what I am asking is, "Is he responsible for paying half of the matrimonial home mortgage up until the very point that his name is taken off the title of the house."

            Comment


            • #7
              I guess the simplest answer is - no. Without a court order requiring him to pay 1/2 the mortgage, he is not obligated to pay. He can walk away just like any other individual who chooses to abandon their house (like so many did in the States during the financial crisis). Edit - but, as mentioned above, there is good reason for him to continue. It makes sense to keep numbers moving forward and staying entitled to any growth in value. And also keeps the occupational rent argument fairly one-sided in your ex's favour. Edit again - also if, he wants to keep his credit he would continue to pay.

              If in your agreement, he agrees that you are entitled to SS and will pay SS and offset C/S, that is all he has to pay. You don't get SS, C/S and 1/2 the mortgage paid. You have to pay your bills with that money. He has his own bills to pay.
              Last edited by HammerDad; 03-26-2014, 03:45 PM.

              Comment


              • #8
                I think the replies you received answered your question, but perhaps they are not the answers you seek.

                1. Yes he is responsible to pay 1/2 the mortgage if his name is on the ownership
                2. No you pay the utilities
                3. He can charge you occupational rent
                4. The proceeds from the house are split 50/50
                5. Spousal support is,not automatically given so it is not wise to keep saying you will get it. And do not rely on it.
                6. Joint custody with 50/50 shared access means you will get an offset amount of child support not the full tabled amount.
                7. Do the math, do not count on the child support or spousal support when determining your new lifestyle.
                8. Oh and keep,the house looking nice, as you will want to make as much money from it as possible. So if you do,anything to,the house keep the receipts.
                9. Split all bank accounts asap. Until you separate all joint debt is split 50/50

                Think,that covered all,the answers.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Thank you so much everyone for your replies! Things are getting a lot clearer for me.

                  What I am confused most about is this,

                  He makes more than twice as much as I do for his salary. (I have taken a little bit a career hit as I chose to be a stay at home mother for a few years). If we were to split our joint accounts right now, and our paychecks started going into our own account, I do not have enough money to cover the mortgage for this house and all of the bills, groceries, gas, etc. I would need him to start making support payments in order to afford everything.

                  But I do not know exactly how much support I would receive, because we do not have our separation agreement in place yet. I have a rough idea based on the divorcemate table amounts, yet as everyone has mentioned, these cannot be trusted, as there is a low and high range of amounts, and I do not know how much/if any spousal support I will receive.

                  So before the separation agreement is in place, how do I determine how much support he would pay me? Would I just work that out with my husband?

                  Thanks again!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Tawanda View Post
                    Thank you so much everyone for your replies! Things are getting a lot clearer for me.

                    What I am confused most about is this,

                    He makes more than twice as much as I do for his salary. (I have taken a little bit a career hit as I chose to be a stay at home mother for a few years). If we were to split our joint accounts right now, and our paychecks started going into our own account, I do not have enough money to cover the mortgage for this house and all of the bills, groceries, gas, etc. I would need him to start making support payments in order to afford everything.

                    But I do not know exactly how much support I would receive, because we do not have our separation agreement in place yet. I have a rough idea based on the divorcemate table amounts, yet as everyone has mentioned, these cannot be trusted, as there is a low and high range of amounts, and I do not know how much/if any spousal support I will receive.

                    So before the separation agreement is in place, how do I determine how much support he would pay me? Would I just work that out with my husband?

                    Thanks again!
                    Neither of you are going to be able to afford the lifestyle you had before, that's a fact. You are going from two incomes paying for all that stuff. Now you will have one income and both of you will have to pay for all that stuff.

                    Most people cannot continue to live in the house they were in when married.

                    You need to figure out what YOU can afford without any support. That is your new reality. Your ex is also going to have to do the same.

                    As mentioned because your income is lower you can expect to receive some child support.

                    In my case I make almost double my ex and I pay her around $500 / month in child support. I stood firm that she was not entitled to spousal even though she had taken time off work to be with the kids. And again I make almost double what she did. She received $3000 extra cash as part of equalization to account for what little support she could have been entitled to had she proved entitlement.

                    It is a huge adjustment in finances. No more eating out, cutting back on cell phones, cable, internet, etc.

                    Hope that helps.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Tawanda View Post
                      Thank you so much everyone for your replies! Things are getting a lot clearer for me.

                      What I am confused most about is this,

                      He makes more than twice as much as I do for his salary. (I have taken a little bit a career hit as I chose to be a stay at home mother for a few years). If we were to split our joint accounts right now, and our paychecks started going into our own account, I do not have enough money to cover the mortgage for this house and all of the bills, groceries, gas, etc. I would need him to start making support payments in order to afford everything.

                      But I do not know exactly how much support I would receive, because we do not have our separation agreement in place yet. I have a rough idea based on the divorcemate table amounts, yet as everyone has mentioned, these cannot be trusted, as there is a low and high range of amounts, and I do not know how much/if any spousal support I will receive.

                      So before the separation agreement is in place, how do I determine how much support he would pay me? Would I just work that out with my husband?

                      Thanks again!
                      As a rule I would suggest that you try to work wit the low end of the Divorcemate tables. To try and go in front of a judge and get more than the low end, you would have to prove why you need it. And going to court will cost you thousands if not tens of thousands and the process may take years. My ex was highly combative, but she was wise enough not to push this one.

                      If you cannot afford the house unless he contributes to the mortagage and pays you child support and spousal support, you can't afford the house.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        You have received some good advice. I am just going to add the following...

                        CS is easy to figure out. You take your salary, apply the CS tables that is what you owe him for CS, then you take his salary, apply the CS tables and that is what he owes you. You do not need a separation agreement or court order for that part. That is really easy.

                        As for Occupational Rent...you need to look into this. Basically what it means is you would be charged far market rent for that property. Lets say fair market value would be $1500 per month, that means you would owe him $750. Only $750 because he is 50% owner, as are you, so you only pay him half of the market rent.

                        So if your mortgage a month is say $1600, you both must pay $800, but remember, you owe him $750 for rent, so he would only owe you $50 a month for the mortgage.

                        If you use HammerDads numbers, in this case he would only owe you $550... this does not take into consideration any SS and you should not consider SS in this calculation. Really you should not even count on CS to make your budget, but that isn't always easy.

                        You can't expect him to pay for his own place, plus continue paying for the mat home, when he has no access to it and it is not your residence. Essentially you are now his tenant for a lack of a better term.

                        You should know if you can afford the house or not, again DON'T use CS or potential SS to do this calculation. If you cannot afford the house on your own salary, or to buy him out, I wouldn't waste any time putting the house up for sale. You don't need a separation agreement to do that if you both agree.

                        Remember... you are paying lawyers a lot of money. The more you two can agree one without lawyers, the more you will have financially in the end.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          In order for me to buy him out of the home, I would have to offset it with his RRSPs that he owes me. He has a considerable amount of investments, that I am entitled to half of. Enough that I could likely offset his portion of the mortgage with RRSPs. My lawyer also had mentioned that I could use some of the RRSPs toward my monthly mortgage payment. This idea, however, scares me a bit. As I am not sure it is the wisest to use my portion of RRSPs to go toward my house. For one thing, then I wouldn't have as much RRSPs of my own for retirement. On the other hand, if I used the RRSPs towards the house, the value is still there, only in a different form.

                          Does anyone have an opinion whether it would do me any harm to offset the mortgage buyout using RRSPs?

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            how much is owed still on the house and how much is it worth in todays market? I would talk to a bank first to see if you can even get a mortgage. Don't forget there are other costs like repairs etc that you will have to be able to afford to do.

                            Sometimes its just better to sell then start fresh.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Some of the advice you've received is correct; most of it is wrong.

                              Frankly, I'd make an appointment with your banker and let them know there is a separation in the works; and you will not be making any mortgage payments for the next few months. They won't power of sale for at least 4 - 6 months so you've got time to deal with the discussion/sale of mat home if necessary.

                              Stop paying taxes as well, if you pay them directly, cancel your pre-auth. Municipalities take forever to catch up to owners. Both of those big ticket monthly items will be divided at equalization/date of settlement, and you won't get any credit for paying them out of your own pocket - i.e, if he is not paying half of those expenses, you don't either. Save your money for your new place.

                              Do pay your utilities.

                              Insist on the payment of cs as of the day he left. You should be able to calculate that cs payment based on your respective salaries. Insist now on the payment of ss. Hasn't your lawyer passed this on to his? How long has the ex been out of the house? Send a letter now.

                              And for gods sake, no, don't draw from RRSP's to make monthly mortgage payments before settlement- that is a double hit to you personally.

                              PM me if you have questions.
                              Start a discussion, not a fire. Post with kindness.

                              Comment

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