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  • Police incident report - seeking advice

    Hi everyone,

    This past weekend, ex and his wife got into a series of fights which escalated, and police were called to their residence. Kid and Stepsibling were present throughout. After police arrived, Stepsibling's dad (Wife's ex-husband) was called, and Kid and Stepsibling went to his house. I was out of town and couldn't get back immediately. I have had phone and text communication with both Kid and Step's dad and have confirmed that Kid and Step are safe. Kid is coming to me per the schedule tomorrow.

    I am trying to sort out the implications of this deterioration in conditions at Ex's house. My question for now: does anyone know how to obtain a copy of a police report? I would like more information on what happened and how serious the situation was. Kid and Step were hiding in the basement until the police arrived, so they don't have verifiable accounts (and they're just kids). I have talked to Ex, and his version is that it's all Wife's fault for acting crazy and he calmly called the police to "teach her a lesson". Needless to say, I find that account hard to believe.

    I don't know if any charges were laid. I would like to have some documentation of this incident in case more like it occur in the future. I do not intend to use this to harass Ex or Wife, I'm just worried.

    Any suggestions?

  • #2
    Originally posted by stripes View Post
    Hi everyone,

    This past weekend, ex and his wife got into a series of fights which escalated, and police were called to their residence. Kid and Stepsibling were present throughout. After police arrived, Stepsibling's dad (Wife's ex-husband) was called, and Kid and Stepsibling went to his house. I was out of town and couldn't get back immediately. I have had phone and text communication with both Kid and Step's dad and have confirmed that Kid and Step are safe. Kid is coming to me per the schedule tomorrow.

    I am trying to sort out the implications of this deterioration in conditions at Ex's house. My question for now: does anyone know how to obtain a copy of a police report? I would like more information on what happened and how serious the situation was. Kid and Step were hiding in the basement until the police arrived, so they don't have verifiable accounts (and they're just kids). I have talked to Ex, and his version is that it's all Wife's fault for acting crazy and he calmly called the police to "teach her a lesson". Needless to say, I find that account hard to believe.

    I don't know if any charges were laid. I would like to have some documentation of this incident in case more like it occur in the future. I do not intend to use this to harass Ex or Wife, I'm just worried.

    Any suggestions?
    Speaking from experience -

    The police report will be forwarded to CAS. The police are mandated reporters and if they are called to a home and there are children present, CAS will be notified. If you want to be proactive, contact CAS and inquire about which social worker will be handling this case. It could take time to run through the system, depending on the gravity of the parent's offences.

    Comment


    • #3
      You can also call and ask the police. For privacy reasons they may withhold it. You might have to do a freedom of information request. You could also ask to speak with the responding officers and/or their sergeant on duty. It might get you nowhere or it might get you answers. Worth a shot though!

      Comment


      • #4
        I believe Ms.Mom is correct, CAS will be automatically notified in a case of domestic violence with children present.

        I am so sorry your D had to go through that. It must have been very scary for her, and also very upsetting for you, being out of town and not able to be there in person for her. Hopefully she won't be traumatized by this. Maybe you can use this as a teachable moment as in what not to do when having a disagreement with someone else, and not letting disagreements escalate into violence.

        Anyways, my heart goes out to your D.

        EDIT: Just reread your post and I may have overreached. Not sure if there was actual violence or not. Still very scary for kids though.
        Last edited by PeacefulMoments; 07-04-2016, 08:02 AM. Reason: re-read original post

        Comment


        • #5
          Quick update:

          I went to the local police station and learned that I can request a "third-party report" of the incident through FOIPP procedures, which is time-consuming and costly. However, because I have the address of the incident, I was able to get the name and badge number of the officer in charge of the response to the incident. I was advised to leave a voice message asking him to call me, as officers feel more free to speak about safety concerns in person/phone than in writing. I'll see what I can find out, including whether there is any CAS follow-up. At the moment, I don't know whether this was a violent incident or just more drunken yelling and fighting between Ex and Wife. Ex's mental health and addiction issues have been spiralling downward in the last few months, and I'm concerned about the direction this is heading.

          Comment


          • #6
            The individuals involved can request a copy of the report, but a third party cannot easily get a police report. When the involved party requests a copy the incident is edited to remove any information about the other party.

            It is not easy to get a report that is complete.

            So if your ex asks for a copy, any information about his girlfriend will blacked out. Drunk, combative, whatever, you will not know.

            Comment


            • #7
              Because you're a parent of a child witness to the incident the officer may speak with you directly and let you know what happened. Putting things in writing complicates things. Your daughter will also be able to tell you her version of the events. Cops are good at assisting families going through this. Im related to a couple of them and they do take the time to speak with concerned parties.

              Comment


              • #8
                I finally got through to speak to the constable who answered the call and he was extremely helpful - gave me a detailed description of what had happened as well as his assessment of the level of risk of violence (very low, from what he saw). He also asked for some information about Ex and Wife to add to the file. He said child protection will be opening an investigation to confirm that the home is safe. Also, Kid is with me now and we've talked about the incident - she is pretty freaked out, but not panicky. I am very relieved. I have the information I needed, so I don't think the written report is necessary right now.

                Comment

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