Well I haven't been a member long and only posted a few times, but with any luck I won't be needing more advice.
We had our Settlement conference last week. Originally judge accepted her lawyers (duty counsel) statement that we couldn't negotiate. Judge said he had been reading file and it needed a trial as soon as possible. We were sent to hall to fill out package. My daughters mother came to me asking to mediate. I had sent offers to settle no reply, I offered to mediate and she didn't want to all morning. Long story short (3 hours later) we had an agreement.
My daughters mother had custody and had continued to try to take away my access. She even withheld for months at a time. She from the start said because we were not married and I didn't know about my daughter until she was almost 1 that I wouldn't get anything. Its been a 10 year fight. up until this order I was only getting everyother weekend, and a mid week short visit. No Sunday overnights, no extension for long weekends, and minimal summer and holiday schedule.
OCL got involved recommended joint custody but wanted to decrease my access even more then the small amount I was getting.
I was able to get shared custody access is 50/50 or at least almost give or take a percentage or two, holiday schedule I wanted, and almost every point I was looking for regarding other issues in our situation. I lost a few things but in the long run they weren't the most important of the issues.
Our order is very complicated and ended up being 5 pages long, the written endorsement page is about 8. Judge was so happy we negotiated he took extra time, jokes were made, and he completely changed the rules of court that day!
Child support is a little confusing and not sure whats going to happen with that because I am still just paying the table amount. I have started to read that it seems most pay a different then table amount in a 50/50 shared time situation. I don't pay any s.7 expenses though so I guess I will have to look into how that all works....but for now I am just happy that I now have moved from about 25/75 time to a 50/50 time.
We had our Settlement conference last week. Originally judge accepted her lawyers (duty counsel) statement that we couldn't negotiate. Judge said he had been reading file and it needed a trial as soon as possible. We were sent to hall to fill out package. My daughters mother came to me asking to mediate. I had sent offers to settle no reply, I offered to mediate and she didn't want to all morning. Long story short (3 hours later) we had an agreement.
My daughters mother had custody and had continued to try to take away my access. She even withheld for months at a time. She from the start said because we were not married and I didn't know about my daughter until she was almost 1 that I wouldn't get anything. Its been a 10 year fight. up until this order I was only getting everyother weekend, and a mid week short visit. No Sunday overnights, no extension for long weekends, and minimal summer and holiday schedule.
OCL got involved recommended joint custody but wanted to decrease my access even more then the small amount I was getting.
I was able to get shared custody access is 50/50 or at least almost give or take a percentage or two, holiday schedule I wanted, and almost every point I was looking for regarding other issues in our situation. I lost a few things but in the long run they weren't the most important of the issues.
Our order is very complicated and ended up being 5 pages long, the written endorsement page is about 8. Judge was so happy we negotiated he took extra time, jokes were made, and he completely changed the rules of court that day!
Child support is a little confusing and not sure whats going to happen with that because I am still just paying the table amount. I have started to read that it seems most pay a different then table amount in a 50/50 shared time situation. I don't pay any s.7 expenses though so I guess I will have to look into how that all works....but for now I am just happy that I now have moved from about 25/75 time to a 50/50 time.
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