Hi All,
I’m a newlywed. Been married for 7 month and we dated for 5 years. I’m in my early 30’s and we are already thinking about splitting up, I feel embarrassed L
We never lived together and now that we do it’s a constant battle. I’m no saint but my wife is so anal about keep up appearance, so much so that I feel uncomfortable in my own house; God forbid I leave the TV remote on the sofa instead of the “remote tray”!
The major issue (and I knew this going in) I have nothing in common with her family, it’s come to the point that it annoys me to even hear the point of views. My wife wants me to be close to her family and I explained to her that I don’t have anything in common so it’s hard for me to sit there for hours at a dinner table (it’s an Italian thing). If I don’t go I’m accused of being rude, if I go and only stay 3 hours it’s because I'm rude. She wants to have dinner at her parents once a week. I totally disagree since I think we should focus on me and her and not our parents. My wife sees her parents 4 times per week (she works nearby), I think it’s great for her to go there at lunch but don’t force me to go there. If I tell her I’m stopping over at my dad’s to say hello or to get a bite to eat she gets upset and thinks it’s rude to not go together. We had a huge fight a few weeks ago where she said fine you go to your family’s place and I will go to mine. It’s not really what I want. I just want to have to option to not go if I’m exhausted. Example. She wants to go to dinner at her moms on a Wed. night and I agree to go. However if I happen to have a terrible day at work or drained of energy and don’t feel like being in bumper to bumper traffic for well over 1 hour, I want to be comfortable enough to call and explain the situation and how I’m going home (15min from my work) and I will go by another day. I don’t have that option. If I do that I will have a 4 hour argument when I get home. Furthermore, she calls her mom every night to say goodnight, as if she is having a sleep over and needs her permission (this is after she spent a better part of the day talking to her)?
I’ve lost the urge to be with her, I feel like I’m always waiting for the next fight. We can be great for 5 days and then one of us wakes up on the wrong side of the bed and all hell breaks loose.
Its driven me to the point of having an “emotional friend” and ex girlfriend that I dated and we have always reminded friends. We broke up because our religions where different and her parents didn’t approve. I didn’t want her fighting with her family so against her wishes I broke up with her. I know turning to someone else for emotional comfort is wrong (nothing has happened physically). The idea of being single and on my own has crossed my mind and I feel guilty. I’m unhappy.
Sorry for the long winded story but I have not spoken to anyone due to the fact that we have not been married a year yet. I feel like a failure and I’m very embarrassed. Again I’m no saint but I lost the urge to make it work and simply waiting for D-Day L
I’m a newlywed. Been married for 7 month and we dated for 5 years. I’m in my early 30’s and we are already thinking about splitting up, I feel embarrassed L
We never lived together and now that we do it’s a constant battle. I’m no saint but my wife is so anal about keep up appearance, so much so that I feel uncomfortable in my own house; God forbid I leave the TV remote on the sofa instead of the “remote tray”!
The major issue (and I knew this going in) I have nothing in common with her family, it’s come to the point that it annoys me to even hear the point of views. My wife wants me to be close to her family and I explained to her that I don’t have anything in common so it’s hard for me to sit there for hours at a dinner table (it’s an Italian thing). If I don’t go I’m accused of being rude, if I go and only stay 3 hours it’s because I'm rude. She wants to have dinner at her parents once a week. I totally disagree since I think we should focus on me and her and not our parents. My wife sees her parents 4 times per week (she works nearby), I think it’s great for her to go there at lunch but don’t force me to go there. If I tell her I’m stopping over at my dad’s to say hello or to get a bite to eat she gets upset and thinks it’s rude to not go together. We had a huge fight a few weeks ago where she said fine you go to your family’s place and I will go to mine. It’s not really what I want. I just want to have to option to not go if I’m exhausted. Example. She wants to go to dinner at her moms on a Wed. night and I agree to go. However if I happen to have a terrible day at work or drained of energy and don’t feel like being in bumper to bumper traffic for well over 1 hour, I want to be comfortable enough to call and explain the situation and how I’m going home (15min from my work) and I will go by another day. I don’t have that option. If I do that I will have a 4 hour argument when I get home. Furthermore, she calls her mom every night to say goodnight, as if she is having a sleep over and needs her permission (this is after she spent a better part of the day talking to her)?
I’ve lost the urge to be with her, I feel like I’m always waiting for the next fight. We can be great for 5 days and then one of us wakes up on the wrong side of the bed and all hell breaks loose.
Its driven me to the point of having an “emotional friend” and ex girlfriend that I dated and we have always reminded friends. We broke up because our religions where different and her parents didn’t approve. I didn’t want her fighting with her family so against her wishes I broke up with her. I know turning to someone else for emotional comfort is wrong (nothing has happened physically). The idea of being single and on my own has crossed my mind and I feel guilty. I’m unhappy.
Sorry for the long winded story but I have not spoken to anyone due to the fact that we have not been married a year yet. I feel like a failure and I’m very embarrassed. Again I’m no saint but I lost the urge to make it work and simply waiting for D-Day L
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