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Divorcing A High-Conflict Personality

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  • #16
    FWB...was not directing his post to an individual.


    He was saying that sometimes those that seek sole custody can be the HCP. This applies when there are two capable parents that are capable and involved.


    Everyone has there own definition of co-parenting. Some will ask or demand to be apart of every decision for the child even when the child is not in their care.

    His comment...Here we go again. Was because many personalize the subjects and comments on the forum and do not look at the subject in a general sense.


    It is normal for all of us to have our own expiriences.....

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    • #17
      I find it ironic how this thread turned out...

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      • #18
        http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...me-school-work

        Interesting read on HCP.

        A snippet....
        Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

        We recommend having a private working theory that someone may be an HCP. But be careful! Don’t tell the person and you don’t assume you must be right. Don’t ask them to look at the criteria to see if they spot themselves. We can guarantee this will make you an enemy. Instead, focus on strategies to help you be more effective in managing your relationship.

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        • #19
          my best advice is to get your lawyer involved - lawyers talking to lawyers, not exes talking to exes. I had a great divorce lawyer in Barrie who I relied on for everything during my divorce since I couldn't talk to my crazy ex like a normal person.
          Last edited by blinkandimgone; 07-05-2014, 03:05 PM. Reason: No trolling for business allowed

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          • #20
            Originally posted by BGalbr567 View Post
            my best advice is to get your lawyer involved - lawyers talking to lawyers, not exes talking to exes. I had a great divorce lawyer in Barrie who I relied on for everything during my divorce since I couldn't talk to my crazy ex like a normal person.
            ^^^ I note that your username (BGalbr) is very close to the name of the "great divorce lawyer" you are recommending for high-conflict divorces. Are you actually the lawyer him/herself? If so, I'd advise forum members to think seriously about whether they want to retain lawyers who troll for business on Internet forums by claiming to be happy clients. This isn't exactly a reliable or objective recommendation. A straightforward advertisement would be more honest.

            Mods, are there any policy or rules about this?

            And if the poster above is no relation at all to the lawyer in Barrie, I apologize for jumping to conclusions.
            Last edited by blinkandimgone; 07-05-2014, 03:08 PM. Reason: edited business ad and name

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            • #21
              Yes, there are policies against this, and i suspect you are correct, good catch Stripes. Follows the typical pattern of random commentary posts with no value to establish a number of posts before posting an ad trolling for business.

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              • #22
                Originally posted by BGalbr567 View Post
                my best advice is to get your lawyer involved - lawyers talking to lawyers, not exes talking to exes. I had a great divorce lawyer in Barrie who I relied on for everything during my divorce since I couldn't talk to my crazy ex like a normal person.
                Letting the lawyers deal with all communications between ex spouses can be extremely expensive and can make matters worse if one or both lawyers are combative.

                Some HC ex's will harass the OP's lawyer with useless micro-managing just to jack up their spouses legal bills - a strategy to 'wear them down' and gain an advantage that way.

                If the OP has legal aid and cares nothing about billable hours involved, your screwed? The courts wanting best interest of the children will maintain a lopsided status-quo even if it means an injustice to one of the parents.

                How can shared parenting work without a minimum of civil communications? This means that a HC spouse can control the procedure by behaving badly - and the courts seem to condone this...

                In my case, there is a criminal no contact order - zero contact since the date of separation. All communication has been via our lawyers. It is not only financially draining, it has been frustratingly slow and often times it has made a bad situation even worse.

                My advice to anyone dealing with a HC Ex, keep all communication to a bare minimum - but keep communicating. Once the lawyers become your mouth piece, misunderstandings increase in proportion to your legal bills!
                Last edited by blinkandimgone; 07-05-2014, 03:09 PM. Reason: removed business ad

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