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  • #16
    stoop,

    it appears they got an emergency motion date. Voice your concerns in your affidavit clear and concise to the Judge. Attach your written letter. Judges try to rule with caution in mind.

    lv

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    • #17
      thank you very much LV

      Comment


      • #18
        Hi everyone it's stoopid1 again.

        It's official that I have to report to family court friday @ 10:00am without a lawyer and on 2 days notice.

        In the history section of her affidavit there are 26 items listed and of those only 9 items are about my daughter going to japan. There are 4 items that are general info like married, kids, divorced blah blah. So this now leaves thirteen items about me. These 13 items are lies and put in there as her twisted version of the truth, they have nothing to do with the japan trip and everything to do to make me look bad and I must say she did an outstanding and superb job at it.

        If a judge reads her statement and believes it to be true, they are going to come out ready to tear me a brand new behind. therefore I desperately need to file an answer to her affidavit so that the judge will have a chance to see that everything she says in her statement is not truth before they come out ready to kill me. The ex is a master at twisting and lieing to make me look bad. For a time she had my own parents believing her crap.

        I'll be there without a lawyer, my nerves are shot, I'm a horrible speaker and I go blank when I'm stressed right out so you can see what a wonderfull experience this will all be for me on friday. Does any one know how to file an answer on my own and before friday when I'm on the hot seat. I'd really appreciate advice on this. I don't know how to go about it.

        My other question would be if I would be permitted to use telephone conversation recordings or transripts against her? As well as to messages left on my answering machine? I'll be up late so anyone who can help will be God sent.
        thanks, stoopid

        Comment


        • #19
          stoop,

          you have to complete your own affidavit. If you don't agree with the paragraphs and statements, you can rebut the statements or tell your own version of events.

          In regards to the telephone and recorded transcripts, you can refer to them

          ie: party x said this on such and such a date, The conversation was recorded.

          The time for filing an affidavit is usually 2 days before the motion.

          Remember that the other issues were thrown in to throw you off track. A curve ball so to speak. Don't lose focus of the primary issue.

          You can get a blank affidavit form here "form 14A"
          http://www.ontariocourtforms.on.ca/e...mily/index.jsp

          in either pdf or word format.

          If you don't have ms word, go here and download open office . Its free! You can use it to manipulate word docs.

          http://download.openoffice.org/2.0.2/index.html

          For the affidavit writing, take a look at this post for some tips on same.

          http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/d...hlight=heresay

          Normally the motion material are to be served well in advance. Seems like they are trying to ambush you on this.

          lv

          Comment


          • #20
            thank you LV

            Sorry for not responding sooner, for the second night in a row now I've been up past 3:00am to prepare for friday. Thanks to your post Lv I was able to write up my answer last night and got everything done at the court house as well as served her lawyers secretary with the answer. I could never have got this done without you. I think I'll most likely lose tommorrow at least I can say I did my best to protect my daughter. Thank you thank you thank you. I'll post the results of tommorrows events asap.
            stoopid1

            Comment


            • #21
              stoop,

              you don't really know what is going to happen on the motion. Judges tend to rule on the side of caution when matters involve children.

              I think the Judge will most likely have made its opinion on how they are going to rule just by the paperwork submitted.

              Attending at the courthouse is good, you will be somewhat at ease tomorrow. You will have some bearings. When addressing the Judge stand and remember to refer to the Judge as "your honour."

              To help you feel somewhat at ease, picture the Judge sitting in their underwear. They say this is a good technique when giving speeches. A friend of mine whom is a member of toastmasters told me this tip.

              Court room attire, I recommend you do where a suit and tie. Appearance and perception is everything.

              You have done everything you could have done in consideration of the circumstance. As a parent, you have done your duty to protect your child from possible harm.


              Best of luck tomorrow

              lv

              Comment


              • #22
                I don't know if you'll get this message in time but:

                1. Most courts have duty counsel available. You should go in a bit early and track one down to see what legal help you can get.

                2. I'd at least try to get an adjournment. If it's possible to get another court date prior to the scheduled departure for Japan, I think you'd have a good chance of getting the adjournment. If there is time for an adjournment you may also want to question your spouse to find out more details about the trip to Japan.

                GOOD LUCK!!
                Ottawa Divorce

                Comment


                • #23
                  well it's over

                  Hi, I just got home and I lost. The judge is permitting the trip to Japan. I can't believe that someone can sign a legal affidavit full of lies and get away with it. I wasn't able to produce anything I had because it hadn't been submitted with my answer. Thanks for all your help, I'll write more after work.
                  stoopid1

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                  • #24
                    Sorry to hear. I'm curious to know what happened...
                    Ottawa Divorce

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Hi everyone,

                      well needless to say I'm pretty exhausted having slept only 10 hours since Tuesday. I lost today in court but I was in a no win situation anyway because my daughter would have hated me if I'd been successful in blocking this trip.

                      For the last 3 nights, my fiancee and I have been up until 3:30am getting things ready for court today and we had everything we needed to shine true light on all the lies in the ex's affidavit only to be told we couldn't use any of it because it wasn't submitted with the answer. That was a hard lesson learned.

                      I had to sit there while the ex's lawyer told lie after lie ( not his fault, he's going on the ex's info ) and I couldn't prove my case. I don't really blame the judge for ruling as she did either in view of the evidence she saw.

                      they tried to get $1000.00 court cost from me as well but the judge said no. She believed that I hadn't been informed of the contract before it was signed.

                      the next thing now is a case conference on july 11th to determine new child support amount I owe. I'll start a new thread with those details. It'll be good for a laugh and you'll know then why I'm stoopid1.

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        I'm so sorry that things didn't work out for you in court today. I too would have done everything in my power to stop this trip. Your daughter is far to young & impressionable to be getting involved in something like this. I take it from your post that you lost on a technicality, because your paper work was not in order??? That's heartbreaking. Maybe some of the other members with more legal knowledge would know of another route to take. It may not be too late. Now is the time to scrape, beg & borrow some money, to get the advice of a lawyer. Get use to being sleep deprived I can only image if she does end up going that you will be up all night with worry until her safe return.

                        Comment


                        • #27
                          stoop,

                          Sorry to hear that. You mentioned

                          For the last 3 nights, my fiancee and I have been up until 3:30am getting things ready for court today and we had everything we needed to shine true light on all the lies in the ex's affidavit only to be told we couldn't use any of it because it wasn't submitted with the answer. That was a hard lesson learned.
                          When you say answer, did you not file an affidavit of your own?

                          Take a look at this rule as listed in the Family law Rules

                          http://www.e-laws.gov.on.ca/DBLaws/R.../990114a_e.htm

                          Rule 14 motions

                          OTHER MOTIONS


                          14 (6) Subrule (4) does not apply to a motion,

                          (a) to change a temporary order under subrule 15 (14) (fraud, mistake, lack of notice);

                          lv

                          Comment


                          • #28
                            thanks

                            hi Grace, LV & Jeff

                            thanks for taking time to post. I think it's pretty much game over for me. She leaves on the 26th. All I can do at this point is pray and I still can't believe this is really happening.

                            I sort of had a lawyer because with Jeff's post I was able to get duty councel for 10 minutes before we were called in. The duty councel never had a chance to finish reading the affidavits before we had to go in. This young girl was awsome for the amount of time she had to prepare, I was really impressed with her and she tried her very best. My ex had our two daughters attend court today as well. The one going to Japan went into the court room and the duty councel had the Judge ask her to leave the court room. My daughters wouldn't even look at me and were brought there as ammunition against me if need by the ex. I'm certain they were well rehearsed also.

                            The first thing the Judge asked was if we wanted to adjourne this motion. I said that we were ready to argue the motion today before I realized I couldn't use all the material we stayed up for three days to put together.

                            Hi LV, yes I did file an affidavit of my own but I would have had to attach exhibit A, exhibit b and so on. I didn't know that ( stoopid1 remember ).
                            I thought the judge would ask me questions and I'd be able to respond with hard proof against her claim. I had emails, tape recorded telephone calls, photo's and written transcriptions of recorded phone calls. I thought I could produce these items on the spot but I was wrong .

                            Thanks jeff for the duty councel post, it was a huge help even though the outcome wasn't what I had hoped for. All of you are so awsome to take time to help me and much appreciated

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              I can't believe it is happening either. My thoughts and prayers are with you, but quite frankly I don't think that will be enough to protect your daughter. I always believed that the Judges ruled on the side of caution and clearly this didn't happen in your case. As far as having your daughters attend court, its a legal "tactic", which I have become too familiar with. Bring the kids to court to let the Judge see a "face" to the story, then have them leave before all the "ugly affidavits".

                              It is so sad in your case that you didn't, couldn't afford to have a lawyer represent you. They know the ropes and would have had your proof properly presented.

                              I still hope & pray that somehow this trip can be stopped. Like you said in an earlier post there are many reputable agencies in Canada & the US that she could pursue her dreams.

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                hi Grace

                                Hi Grace

                                I wasn't able to afford a lawyer. If I could ultimately it would be Jeff. I'm self employed and my income is down half from last year. I've only made
                                $10 000 in the last 7 months and thats not good. Business is slow everywhere around here due to the economy. I'm in such bad shape that I qualified for legal aid to get my child support order varried in july 2006.
                                Life certainly isn't fair. I'm getting a bit tired of being hit below the belt by this woman.

                                Comment

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