worried about kids

[scareddaddy]

I am very worried I have interm custody of my kids but am very worried about what the future will bring their mother is getting daily access and i feel that the court is concidering giving them back to their mother and pushing me out of their lives despite the overwhelming evidence that supports my case i am by far the better parent. I also am in a bad financial position because of all the court proceedings, i lost my job too. I just wish we could get it over with so we all could get on with our lives.

[Grace]

I hear you and feel for you. I too have been through the court system. Not a pleasant experience.

As for an interim custody order, it is my understanding that these orders are very difficult to change. What makes you think the courts will overturn this? Is it because you have lost your job. Are you actively looking for new employment?

[logicalvelocity]

scareddaddy,

Just an opinion

One thing to remember is that access is the children's right and also for them to have a meaningful relationship with both parent's.

You have interim custody of the children now because the court's have faith and trust you to carry out the children's best interest. It isn't about who is the better parent and this thinking promotes a winner/loser in the minds of the children.

Custody decisions are very difficult for a court to decide. Status quo is a very important consideration for the courts to consider especially if the children are doing well in a status quo regime, because it is evidence in itself. Courts are cautious and do not like to leave matters especially custody decisions to speculation.

Being laid off from employment is a circumstance that happens to many people. This alone will not prejudice the court's opinion of you. In fact it gives you an opportunity in the interim to be there for the children more often rather than child care etc.

I would do what you can to seek and retain employment. This circumstance does not make you unfit to parent your children.

[Jeff]

My experience is that a lot of people lose their jobs after they separate. This is normal. The economy can be capricious and people going through the stress of a separation may not be able to perform their best at work.

Your employment status will have little effect on the decision about custody.

There was a study done sometime last year in Ontario. I forget the exact stats, but something like 90% of all trial decisions on custody were identical to either the interim order or what the Children's Lawyer / custody assessor recomended.

[honey I'm home]

Hey sweetie

you don't say hold old the children are. Sometimes that makes a diff. and money does not make a family, love and togetherness, support of each other and the ability to hug. Don't worry to much about what the courts will do, cause the kids will get wind of it and then they will start to worry. Keep your head up and hug the kids, whatever happens that is something that no one can take from you.