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What forms of payment are accepted for child support in Ontario?

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  • What forms of payment are accepted for child support in Ontario?

    Hello All,

    The first two paragraphs of this are just backgrounder information so you understand the picture and what I am getting at. if you want to get straight to the point just read the last paragraph.

    I am having serious problems with my "daughters mother" with respect to access to my infant daughter. She is unfortunately holding it against me and refusing me access to my daughter because I filed for custody of her as I don't see her as being a fit parent.

    Anyway I haven't seen my daughter in nearly 6 weeks and after discussing things with my lawyer I have voluntarily started paying child support as of this month. Because of her pathetic record for cashing cheques (I had given her two cheques different times before and she sat on them for about 6-8 weeks before cashing them after constantly complaining about money) I refuse to give her a cheque and it is too expensive to constantly give her a certified cheque or money order.

    I decided as I bank with TD and her with RBC that I would pay by an INTERAC email money transfer which I have paid her on two separate occaisions before and she has accepted. She has now sent me a text message saying she can't receive the payment and that she wants me to pay by cheque through her lawyer which I have refused as I have already sent the email transfer. Will the courts uphold this form of payment as I have solid proof that it has been sent to her or will I be forced to send her a cheque/money order?

    Any help is greatly appreciated.

    Regards,

    Stemmy!

  • #2
    email money transfer is fine, just print the screen that comes up as soon as you make the transfer, and keep the email confirming the acceptance of the transfer.

    I did that for a long time. Even used those documents for proof to the CRA when my SS claim was reviewed.
    Last edited by dadtotheend; 06-19-2010, 08:57 PM.

    Comment


    • #3
      If she has been able to accept email payments previously, there is no reason you should now start sending cheques. Keep all receipts of money sent to her with the comments, if you can add them "for child support month of --------". My husbands ex tried to say all money he paid was a gift so protect yourself.

      Comment


      • #4
        Another note, if you've sent it by email transfer you get a notification immediately when it gets deposited. If for some reason there is an issue with it not getting deposited you can also cancel it online.

        If she's having financial issues is it possible her account is overdrawn? That's pretty much the only reason I could see her not wanting to have money deposited directly into her account.

        Comment


        • #5
          Thanks for the information dadtotheend. She claims she cannot accept email money transfers but I sent her 2 last fall within a few weeks of each other and although it took her a week she had no problems receiving them. I have printed the particulars out and made sure it was specified as "child support for the benefit of ___ for June 2010" since she has another child who is nearly 11 who she uses as a chess piece.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
            If she's having financial issues is it possible her account is overdrawn? That's pretty much the only reason I could see her not wanting to have money deposited directly into her account.
            She is fine financially she just likes to create a distress situation for herself. she only owes $35K on her mortgage for a $250k house and has a decent work related disability pension coming in plus child support for her nearly 11 year old pawn (I think of him as my son but unfortunately everytime she kicked me out I couldn't see him either and she would dangle that carrot in front of me whenever she could)

            At one point she had about $10k in her savings account and was complaining so much that she couldn't afford something I just got sick and tired of the bs and just paid it even though it wasn't my responsibility.

            She's just trying to get me to crack to make me look bad but fortunately I have nearly 1000 pages of emails, msn, text and pin messages from her to show what she is like and hopefully I will be able to subpoena medical records as well to show she is not fit both physically and mentally. What a difficult situation. She won't let me see her for my FIRST fathers day today either.

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            • #7
              I'm sorry you don't have your little one today.

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              • #8
                Is there an interim access agreement for the child? If not, you should start pushing your lawyer to file an emergency motion NOW. The longer you wait, the harder time you will have arguing.

                In the absence of an order, you should be paying her TABLE OFFSET amounts. Email money xfer should be fine. If she doesn't have a computer or the internet, then she can take her butt to a local library for 15 mins and do it that way.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by NBDad View Post
                  Is there an interim access agreement for the child? If not, you should start pushing your lawyer to file an emergency motion NOW. The longer you wait, the harder time you will have arguing.

                  In the absence of an order, you should be paying her TABLE OFFSET amounts. Email money xfer should be fine. If she doesn't have a computer or the internet, then she can take her butt to a local library for 15 mins and do it that way.
                  Hello NBDad,

                  She proposed allowing me Tues/Thurs for 2hr and every other Sunday for 3-4 hours but I have to jump through flaming hoops on one leg to get it. She is saying I can't take her to my parents house (where I am living) because of the smoking. I am the biggest asshole around when it comes to smoking and would never have my daughter around it. My parents made the house smoke free on my arguments before she was born that she wouldn't be here otherwise. I am trying to get it setup though my lawyer now. and have instructed him to seek an emergency motion otherwise. She's a real treat....

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    She proposed allowing me Tues/Thurs for 2hr and every other Sunday for 3-4 hours but I have to jump through flaming hoops on one leg to get it. She is saying I can't take her to my parents house
                    How old is your daughter? Is she breastfeeding? If she is NOT breastfeeding, then there is NO REASON you cannot have 50-50 access time. If she IS breastfeeding, then anytime after 12 months, there is no reason. (Make SURE you have it well documented that you are agreeing to LESS TIME in the first 12 months ONLY due to the breastfeeding and wanting your daughter to have the best start in life). You should be able to increase the time after about 6 months, as the child should be starting on solids then and you should be able to take her for a greater amount of time.

                    As long as you are ok with her proposed arrangements, then go nuts...if you actually WANT to be involved...push the 50-50 time NOW.

                    Also, as long as you aren't endangering the child, she doesn't get a vote on where you take the kid. Your time = your time, her time = her time. Unless it places the child in danger...neither of you get a say when it's on the other's clock.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by NBDad View Post
                      How old is your daughter? Is she breastfeeding? If she is NOT breastfeeding, then there is NO REASON you cannot have 50-50 access time.

                      As long as you are ok with her proposed arrangements, then go nuts...if you actually WANT to be involved...push the 50-50 time NOW.

                      Also, as long as you aren't endangering the child, she doesn't get a vote on where you take the kid. Your time = your time, her time = her time. Unless it places the child in danger...neither of you get a say when it's on the other's clock.
                      Hello NBDAD,

                      She is 8 months and not being breastfed. Due to her mom being on TONS of meds including morphine and others she was not able to anyway.

                      In my court papers before I retained a lawyer I asked for temporary custody because she is sick (my daughter is being well cared for but by her parents) and after she recovers then joint custody. I stated with her having primary residence but now that I know more about it I will probably go with shared custody so I have her close to 50-50 or more.

                      I am NOT OK with 4-8 hours a week access but the problem is she is withholding me access all together and I haven't seen my daughter in nearly 6 weeks (I asked for fathers day again yesterday and she denied me for my FIRST fathers day so yesterday was a very difficult day for me.) My lawyer advised me that if I don't accept something then the longer it goes on the more it looks like a power struggle between the two of us. Part of my argument is that she is power hungry and it's her way or the highway not what is in our daughters best interest.

                      I am self-employed and the nature of my business is cyclicle but for the most part I can work in the hours when my daughter is napping and or sleeping at night so I would need very little daycare and also have a good support system behind me. the problem is getting to court to prove all this.

                      Thanks for the assistance it is greatly appreciated.

                      Stemmy

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                      • #12
                        Yeah, kick the lawyer in the ass and get an emergency custody motion going. He is correct in the respect that the longer you allow this to go on, the harder this will be for you to argue.

                        You want 50-50 physical access, you want joint custody, she's denying you access to the child....put forward an emergency motion for custody and get that taken care of.

                        Make sure you are, and have been paying her OFFSET amounts of child support. The SECOND you have that interim order outlining access arrangements, FILE FOR CCTB/UCCB. With 50-50 you are entitled to it 6 months a year, and while you MAY want to play the nice guy and let her "keep it", doing so just adds more ammunition for her to claim sole custody and make things more difficult for you in the long run.

                        Good Luck, I know it sucks, but hang in there. It all comes out in the wash. Her denying access is going to be frowned upon BIG TIME by the courts...they hate those kind of games.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by NBDad View Post
                          Make sure you are, and have been paying her OFFSET amounts of child support. The SECOND you have that interim order outlining access arrangements, FILE FOR CCTB/UCCB. With 50-50 you are entitled to it 6 months a year, and while you MAY want to play the nice guy and let her "keep it", doing so just adds more ammunition for her to claim sole custody and make things more difficult for you in the long run.
                          NBDad,

                          Just want to clarify since I am new to this "game" Offset amounts would be assuming we both have sole custody and based on the other paying support based on their income correct?

                          Ex (Ontario) - If I made $35K I would pay her $325/mo and if she was at $25k she would pay me $211/mo so I would have to pay her $114. Am I thinking of this correctly?

                          If this is the case then she would actually owe me offset amounts as I do make less than her but it all depends on how the imputed income would work as I am self employed. I am pretty confident that my income would stand up in the event of an audit as I do accounting for a living but I can see her coming after me because she feels my income is too low. But it hasn't really changed much from the 2 years before I was with her either so it isn't a case of "hiding" money.

                          Also, If you don't mind me asking are you a lawyer or just know from being heavily involved in the process yourself?

                          Stemmy

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                          • #14
                            Just want to clarify since I am new to this "game" Offset amounts would be assuming we both have sole custody and based on the other paying support based on their income correct?
                            Correct. The child support tables are well documented (go Google Federal Child support tables or some such and it'll come up for you)

                            I am pretty confident that my income would stand up in the event of an audit as I do accounting for a living but I can see her coming after me because she feels my income is too low.
                            If it's a concern, get your last 3 years income tax returns and attach them as your financial evidence. Kind of hard to argue with income tax assessments.

                            Also, If you don't mind me asking are you a lawyer or just know from being heavily involved in the process yourself
                            The latter...wish it was the former. I'm in the wrong profession, hell I WISH I could charge like $400 an hour for MY time. My situation is retardedly unique, I'm in a much better position than 99% of the other fathers here.

                            I have a thread in the introduction forums that outlines a lot of it if you want a good read....I don't need TV, my ex provides hours of drama for all.

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                            • #15
                              Hey Stemmy,

                              I wish I had this advice when I just seperated.

                              I have been fighting the status quo for our children to get more time with their dad (me) while my ex is very well versed in making excuses on why I should not have more time. That contradict her own actions.

                              Get that emergency motion going before it is too late. Tomorrow if posible.
                              Progress Trumps Perfection.


                              Originally posted by NBDad View Post
                              Yeah, kick the lawyer in the ass and get an emergency custody motion going. He is correct in the respect that the longer you allow this to go on, the harder this will be for you to argue.

                              You want 50-50 physical access, you want joint custody, she's denying you access to the child....put forward an emergency motion for custody and get that taken care of.

                              Make sure you are, and have been paying her OFFSET amounts of child support. The SECOND you have that interim order outlining access arrangements, FILE FOR CCTB/UCCB. With 50-50 you are entitled to it 6 months a year, and while you MAY want to play the nice guy and let her "keep it", doing so just adds more ammunition for her to claim sole custody and make things more difficult for you in the long run.

                              Good Luck, I know it sucks, but hang in there. It all comes out in the wash. Her denying access is going to be frowned upon BIG TIME by the courts...they hate those kind of games.

                              Comment

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