My divorce became final last month after three years of separation. I have my kids 50/50 (week on/off) and the arrangment is working well. There was a lot of mud slinging and nonsense during the whole thing with my ex using allegations of child mental and physical, abuse, alcholism, and drug use. I was constantly on the defensive but at the end of the day the courts saw that I was none of those things and "awarded" me my kids 50% of the time.
Time has passed but my bitterness at the court system has grown as I hear of other parents going through the same shit that I did. The stress on the children, parents, family members and the financial strain is too much. I think many of you will agree that the family courts are designed to drain as much money as possible from families with little to no regard for the outcome.
In most cases I believe the judges know the decision they are going to make in regards to custody and access very early in the proceedings but they still allow the lawyers and their clients to nit pick and make accusations and untimately drag things out.
I don't claim to know the ins and outs of the family law system and I know that every case is different but I think the way things are done now needs to be revisited.
Why can't a standardized approach be used that sets specific deadlines for lawyers and clients to appear for a case conference, another date for division of assets and property, custody and access, and finally support determination. Why are these things taking longer than a year or two to figure out? Why is 50/50 parenting not assumed from the very start of legal proceedings?
I'm just ranting but our family law system put a lot of strain on my finances and probably my health from stress, when the parenting arrangement was a no brainer from the start. In almost every case there is one party that is the aggressor and the courts spend too much time listening to and catering to these people.
Like I said, just a rant but I feel really bad for people that are just entering the family law system. If your ex is out to get you, you have a long road ahead.
Time has passed but my bitterness at the court system has grown as I hear of other parents going through the same shit that I did. The stress on the children, parents, family members and the financial strain is too much. I think many of you will agree that the family courts are designed to drain as much money as possible from families with little to no regard for the outcome.
In most cases I believe the judges know the decision they are going to make in regards to custody and access very early in the proceedings but they still allow the lawyers and their clients to nit pick and make accusations and untimately drag things out.
I don't claim to know the ins and outs of the family law system and I know that every case is different but I think the way things are done now needs to be revisited.
Why can't a standardized approach be used that sets specific deadlines for lawyers and clients to appear for a case conference, another date for division of assets and property, custody and access, and finally support determination. Why are these things taking longer than a year or two to figure out? Why is 50/50 parenting not assumed from the very start of legal proceedings?
I'm just ranting but our family law system put a lot of strain on my finances and probably my health from stress, when the parenting arrangement was a no brainer from the start. In almost every case there is one party that is the aggressor and the courts spend too much time listening to and catering to these people.
Like I said, just a rant but I feel really bad for people that are just entering the family law system. If your ex is out to get you, you have a long road ahead.
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