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  • #31
    First off I am a therapist and that thread "thorns started" was not of her life, it was simply a story made up.
    Not to throw all therapists under the bus but I've never been a big fan...most of the ones I've known personally have more issues than a frog in a frying pan and you are a prime example.

    She thought she would find empathy, understanding, support, and maybe some ideas for her own ongoing case. She expressed to me that she had hoped in reading and being part of many discussions that it may benefit her. She thought it may give her more insight and comfort during all of this.
    What she didn't expect was all the mean, non supportive,judgemental comments made to one another.
    So basically, she wasn't expecting to hear the truth. This isn't a place for someone to come to get coddled when they're doing the wrong thing. Its a place sometimes that offers members a "reality check." And let me tell you from personal experience...for intelligent people, a reality check is FAR more helpful when going through the brutal legalities of a divorce than people saying "poor you" then rubbing your back and telling you "its ok" when you're doing the wrong thing for yourself and your kids.


    With saying this I wanted to see how the members in this group would respond to a person who sounded desperate, mentally unstable, depressed, possibly suicidal, out of touch with reality, and basically crying out for help.
    Have your whiny friend call a suicide hotline since you're clearly not qualified to help and its not the purpose of this forum.

    I would imagine most people were feeling much like my friend when they joined a group like this. Sadly I think some have lost their initial reason and are bitter, angry and resentful. It is understandable to feel these things, its just not fair to lash out at others because of your own built up anger.
    I came here for legal advice. Don't assume that YOU have any clue what anyone else thinks or needs when they come here. Most people find the help given on this forum very helpful and have successfully used advice here to move them along through the family law system.

    I would like to ask the moderator how one is to remove themself permanently from this group. If the information could be sent to "thorns" inbox she can deal with it.
    You can't...so try not to be "bitter, angry or resentful" when dealing with your guilt about your dishonesty towards the straight-forward members of this forum.

    Forgive my being candid but you really are a bad person and frankly, I hope this Thorns person gets a better friend and a better therapist in dealing with her personal issues.

    Comment


    • #32
      Personally, when ppl start impersonating other ppl on here (and we have seen it before) I find it very disturbing and a sad reflection on our mental health system. Cfto News ran an interesting segment yesterday about a pilot project in London, Ont to relieve the usual first responders of the burden placed on them when responding to individuals in emotional crisis.

      I believe it was tagged as "Emotional Rescue." Perhaps thorns should give them a call.

      Comment


      • #33
        No "therapist" would do this.
        Certainly no qualified, decent therapist (or person) would do this. Its also highly doubtful that any decent therapist or person would "borrow" someone else's log-in and password to do such a thing.

        I'm sorry but I find it pretty ridiculous that people come here expecting to get coddled when they're doing something legally foolish or potentially emotionally-damaging to their children.

        When I'm doing something wrong...I've always been very thankful when my friends and family have helped me out and told me the truth and given me constructive criticism. I truly have always despised when people, especially therapists, spend all their time telling someone everything they do is fine, ok and understandable when they're potentially damaging themselves and their children.

        Besides, this isn't a suicide hotline...its a divorce forum. This "thorns" person really needs to find better friends.

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        • #34
          I find it hard to believe that even a mediocre therapist would conduct an experiment on a public forum.

          As others above have stated, this is a divorce forum. You ask our opinions and we answer. I for one, certainly don't sugar coat my answers.


          Get over yourself. If you want someone to hold you hand go to the closest emergency department of your community hospital.

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          • #35
            Moderators - I believe "thorns" is requesting to be permanently removed.

            Comment


            • #36
              I happen to have friends, a husband and wife, who are both psychologists and therapists. She does therapy full time, he does part time teaching at univeristy, conducts research, and does some therapy.

              I don't even have to ask them to know what their opinion would be.

              And really, its easy for the OP to follow her request to "permanently remove themselves from this group". Simply don't log in, and create an inbox rule to send any emails from this site to their spam folder or trash. Problem solved.

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              • #37
                Maybe "thorns" can get one of her other personas (a computer savvy one) to re-direct her notifications. :/

                The "therapist" appears to have nothing better to do, maybe she/he can assist . . .

                Comment


                • #38
                  "thorns"

                  Does not comes across as a name (to me at least) that a therapist would choose.

                  I would expect a handle that does not invoke images of sharp pointy things that scratch and poke you when you walk by it.

                  Maybe 'fluffy pillow' instead? That would seem to be more in line with what appears to be your understanding of what therapy is about.

                  But anyways - this isn't a support group. Well, actually it is - for me at least. But I'm a realist, and take the occasional anger that gets thrown around for what it is... a part of the process of divorce.

                  You know the stages of loss/grief, don't you Mrs. Therapist? Certainly 'anger' is among them.

                  Seems like you should know that.

                  Comment


                  • #39
                    It is unlikely that Thorn is a real therapist. She is trying to cause some emotional distress to those that have upset her, by portraying herself as an outside expert qualified to issue a condemnation of our words.

                    Not that I would care if Thorn's was a "real" therapist, since I have little regard for the profession, but in this case I doubt Thorn even reaches that very low bar. She's just a disgruntled person who is about to get her ass kicked by family law.

                    I see no need to delete her posts, the responses to the story, real or otherwise, are important.

                    Comment


                    • #40
                      Originally posted by thorns View Post
                      Now I must say I was very curious to see how this group of people would respond to a post like that. First off I am a therapist and that thread "thorns started" was not of her life, it was simply a story made up..
                      Please don't come on here and make things up. This isn't a place for that. Respect the purpose of the board.

                      Members here are in very stressful situations, generally coming out of very toxic, high conflict situations. Often they need to blow off steam. Often they lose their tempers. Often they feel outraged if they read something that reminds them of how they are treated.

                      As someone who claims to be a "therapist" you should have some awareness of all of those things.

                      I guess I can understand where you are coming from. In your therapist role, you have to be open, and non-judgmental, and say supportive things. So you came hear to set up a scenario so that you could tear down people who answered you. You needed catharsis.

                      However if you are not, yourself, divorcing, you have come to the wrong place for catharsis.

                      Comment


                      • #41
                        Very true, Mess - although I don't think "thorns" is a therapist. More like a nut job.

                        Lol, I was playing around w/diff pics yesterday on my phone (for an avatar) and each pic I tried said "image failed." This morning I see that the beach I WISH I was AT, is my avatar!

                        Comment


                        • #42
                          I would think that a real, certified therapist would know how to use paragraphs.

                          Comment

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