I am at the point where I am considering getting out, finally.
Only been married 3 years, but things have been getting worse in terms of general not getting along, but there has been ocassional violence. I have been pushed into walls a few times, once in a fight I called him an idiot and he pinned me to the bed by my neck, fist to my face, saying he'd kill me if I ever called him an idiot again. We stayed together, tried to make it work... then 2 nights ago we went out, came home and started fighting about stupid stuff (i.e. him not snowblowing the driveway, saying that *I* should have shoveled it myself after I'd come home from work, despite him being home all day)... anyways, he was yelling at me, I was sitting down waiting for him to shut up, and he decided to come at me, pushed me back into the wall so hard my head bounced off it, then choked me for about 10 seconds while yelling at me. Then said I'm apparently 'the reason men kill their wives then kill themselves'. Then asked me to leave the house so I 'wouldn't see what happens next'. He left the room, I heard him dragging things out of the closet, where his gun cabinet is. I called 911.
So I think I probably have enough to claim domestic violence to get the hell out of this shit sooner than waiting 1 year. But if I do claim it, am I going to have to get a lawyer, 'prove' things, fight it out and drag things out moreso than if we just go our separate ways for a year? Will it be messier and more difficult for me, I wonder?
I am HOPING I can get him to agree on a separation agreement between just us two, bring it to a lawyer and have it filed to cut down on costs, and then potentially file the divorce paperwork ourselves too. Am I crazy to think that can be done smoothly if I claim domestic violence?
Thanks in advance.
Only been married 3 years, but things have been getting worse in terms of general not getting along, but there has been ocassional violence. I have been pushed into walls a few times, once in a fight I called him an idiot and he pinned me to the bed by my neck, fist to my face, saying he'd kill me if I ever called him an idiot again. We stayed together, tried to make it work... then 2 nights ago we went out, came home and started fighting about stupid stuff (i.e. him not snowblowing the driveway, saying that *I* should have shoveled it myself after I'd come home from work, despite him being home all day)... anyways, he was yelling at me, I was sitting down waiting for him to shut up, and he decided to come at me, pushed me back into the wall so hard my head bounced off it, then choked me for about 10 seconds while yelling at me. Then said I'm apparently 'the reason men kill their wives then kill themselves'. Then asked me to leave the house so I 'wouldn't see what happens next'. He left the room, I heard him dragging things out of the closet, where his gun cabinet is. I called 911.
So I think I probably have enough to claim domestic violence to get the hell out of this shit sooner than waiting 1 year. But if I do claim it, am I going to have to get a lawyer, 'prove' things, fight it out and drag things out moreso than if we just go our separate ways for a year? Will it be messier and more difficult for me, I wonder?
I am HOPING I can get him to agree on a separation agreement between just us two, bring it to a lawyer and have it filed to cut down on costs, and then potentially file the divorce paperwork ourselves too. Am I crazy to think that can be done smoothly if I claim domestic violence?
Thanks in advance.
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