Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Separation

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Separation

    What is the best way to get in writing that my daughter resides with me? There is currently no separation agreement. I want to get this done asap.

  • #2
    Write it down?

    Comment


    • #3
      Through a lawyer? I need it in place to protect her.

      Comment


      • #4
        Hoping,

        Without more information, no one here will be able to help.

        Why does your daughter need protection? Who does she live with most times now? Does the other parent have contact? Live in the house?

        Hard to know what to do without more info.

        Comment


        • #5
          hold it. In a previous thread you said that the child resides with the father.

          http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...divorce-20529/

          Comment


          • #6
            She did reside with her father up until January 16 of this year. She is having issues in that environment with her step mother, showing aggression towards her younger half sister and other children. CAS has been involved once already and the issue was resolved. However they fear(my ex and his gf) that the issue may start again. Therefore we all felt it was best for her to come and live with me. At least with me she can get the support and attention that she needs. I don't want him to come back later changing his mind and wanting her back. Lately he has nothing positive to say about her. Her dad lives 94km away. He has contact with her via visitation like I did before. It is in her best interest to be with me and I want to get it in writing so that I know he can't just take her because he has a change of heart.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Hoping582 View Post
              Therefore we all felt it was best for her to come and live with me.
              So you worked together as parents to come up with a solution. It is commendable that you both were able to focus on your child rather than the fight.

              It is in her best interest to be with me and I want to get it in writing so that I know he can't just take her because he has a change of heart.
              Oops, I guess I was a little bit to hasty in commending you on your cooperation. So you temporarily have the child (7 days by my count) and you are hoping to find a way to make that permanent and irreversible?

              My guess: You didn't like paying the child support, and have decided that it would be much better to be on the receiving end of the cash.

              Comment


              • #8
                Child support has nothing to do with it. When issues came up starting last August I had offered on 2 different occasions to take her and he said no. Then all of a sudden they can't handle her anymore. Like I mentioned before CAS has been involved once already with him and his gf. They fear it will happen again and they will lose both children. For them it was easier to move her out than try and correct the situation.

                They are the ones that approached me about her moving here. When my daughter tells me over and over that she just gets screamed at by his gf, what else am I supposed to do?? She needs stability and that is something that he cannot give her. To him she never seems to do anything right. He never has anything positive to say about her. She is a 7yr old child and her own dad doesn't believe anything that she tells him.

                Comment


                • #9
                  So the situation is as follows, if I understood correctly:

                  1. Child lives with OP
                  2. CAS get's involved, they agree to you have the child
                  3. You want proof that child is with you

                  Is there not something in CAS records that the children are now with you? Is OP going to deny that children are with you? If you're simply afraid of him coming back and saying he wants the child, you can just say "Our child is showing improvement and doing well with the new regime. I want to continue this regime." You may wish to file an application and seek interim custody. Without a court order, I'm afraid he can refuse to return the child, and file an application in his jurisdiction and seek interim custody.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    The child in question is ours. The other one is from his current gf. After the first CAS episode they had thought they would get through it and he said no to her coming here. They fear of another one coming which was why she was released to my custody. I plan on calling a lawyer tomorrow to discuss the situation. Hopefully I can at least get an agreement made up that will now show that she is in my primary care as nothing has ever been written before.

                    I don't feel that she would at all benefit if she returned to his residence. If her own father won't listen and doesn't believe her I don't feel it's safe for her to be there.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      be very careful about the use of the word "safe."

                      Do you believe your child is in danger?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Write out what you and Dad agreed to (you and Dad have agreed to vary your court order concerning Kid's residence. You both agree Kid will reside primarily with you as of January 16 2017). Put an official-sounding title at the top, like "Memorandum of Agreement". You and Dad both sign it in front of a notary or commissioner for oaths so that your signatures can be witnessed.

                        This won't prevent Dad from changing his mind, but it shows what his intention was at this point in time, in case you do end up in some sort of conflict over where Kid should live.

                        If you can't prove that Kid is in danger at his house, and if your divorce order/legal separation agreement says that Kid resides with him, it will be hard to justify keeping Kid at your house if Dad changes his mind and wants Kid back.

                        Comment

                        Our Divorce Forums
                        Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
                        Working...
                        X