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SC's, Motions and Trial's.. Oh My!

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  • #46
    No I don't plan on denying anything. I'm all about the fairness. But it should go both ways.

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    • #47
      Exactly, so assume she will and make those arrangements now. Expect she will say no. But!

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      • #48
        Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
        I really wish she'd allow some access on Valentnes or Family day. That hurts bad.
        Going forward, make sure you specify a long weekend clause for access.
        Family Day is just a typical long weekend.

        You could split it, but that seems cumbersome for both parents. Better to just state that if long weekend falls on a parents access weekend, that their time is extended to include the extra day. This is assuming you get an equal access schedule, which you should.

        Valentine's day. Probably just treat it as a regular access day (whichever parent has access that day, it's their day). It falls on a regular weekday most years.

        Certainly request March Break time. She will likely squash your request, but you asked. For future, insist on March Break access time, especially considering your employer. Everyday is a vacation day, for your lazy welfare ex.

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        • #49
          Good advice dad2bandm.

          Thank you.

          Just trying to figure out wording for March break request (and denial).

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          • #50
            For future order, you can split March Break, or alternate the years. My order alternates years.

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            • #51
              Honestly, whichever way you word it, likely won't matter for her. I'd expect outright refusal. Crossing fingers for you though. Your ex needs a court order schedule thrown at her...she ain't going to be reasonable until then.

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              • #52
                You are just building up a pattern of her never allowing extra time, even for special days, demonstrating that you need equal time and shared holidays written in a court order. Short term pain, but hopefully long term gain will come of it.

                Tell her that since your request was short notice for this coming weekend, that you'd like to give more advance notice of wanting more time over March Break. Suggest a couple of days attached to the weekend that's already yours to see if you can get D3 for six days in a row. With any luck you'll get an answer that this is too long for her to go without seeing her, which bolsters YOUR view that you should have 50-50 with no more than 5 days apart.

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                • #53
                  Originally posted by Rioe View Post
                  You are just building up a pattern of her never allowing extra time, even for special days, demonstrating that you need equal time and shared holidays written in a court order. Short term pain, but hopefully long term gain will come of it.

                  Tell her that since your request was short notice for this coming weekend, that you'd like to give more advance notice of wanting more time over March Break. Suggest a couple of days attached to the weekend that's already yours to see if you can get D3 for six days in a row. With any luck you'll get an answer that this is too long for her to go without seeing her, which bolsters YOUR view that you should have 50-50 with no more than 5 days apart.
                  Nice Rioe... Nice,

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                  • #54
                    March break is after the next SC.....(I think)

                    Guess Goldilocks picked the wrong time to prove she is hostile and won't work with you on access ( things that are good for D3).

                    Like someone posted...every day is a family day for a welfare bum.

                    Goldilocks has to be COURT ORDERED to do anything with regard to best interest of the child.

                    Thinks will heat up the closer the SC gets....Goldilocks will bring things to a BOIL

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                    • #55
                      Originally posted by Rioe View Post
                      You are just building up a pattern of her never allowing extra time, even for special days, demonstrating that you need equal time and shared holidays written in a court order. Short term pain, but hopefully long term gain will come of it.

                      Tell her that since your request was short notice for this coming weekend, that you'd like to give more advance notice of wanting more time over March Break. Suggest a couple of days attached to the weekend that's already yours to see if you can get D3 for six days in a row. With any luck you'll get an answer that this is too long for her to go without seeing her, which bolsters YOUR view that you should have 50-50 with no more than 5 days apart.
                      March Break is 16th - 20th.. and I have her that weekend following: 20th - 23rd. So should I ask her from Wed March 18th? Sounds reasonable right?

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                      • #56
                        Also . she will say she needs to bring her to playgroup ... or that she would prefer to instead of me. after all the playgroup is called mum stop

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                        • #57
                          I am not sure a out taking her to playgroup. You do not want to ligitmize something you are not consenting to, however, you donot want to deny your child something she enjoys.

                          By its name are you assuming it is only Moms then? I am not sure in the this say and age they can exclude Dads. Unless its for abused women?

                          Again there is no reason you cannot ask. You are asking for more time with D3 and as its March Break and usually this holiday is,shared either alternate years or 1/2 each then you are asking for no,less than any judge would award.

                          if you have on the weekend and also on the wednesday. You are really only asking for Thursday o/n and all day Friday. Not a lot. So ask and she shall deny and you will record.

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                          • #58
                            Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
                            Also . she will say she needs to bring her to playgroup ... or that she would prefer to instead of me. after all the playgroup is called mum stop
                            It doesn't matter what the playgroup is called. You are a parent, and it's important for you to be aware of your child's activities. If you are in town that day, you will bring her to the playgroup. Tell your ex that you'd like to see your daughter's little friends that she speaks so much about, so that you can possibly arrange playdates.

                            Plus, March Break is supposed to be a special break from routine. If you decided to take a vacation to Toronto for those six days, that overrides playgroups in my opinion. Many children's activities suspend for March Break anyways because there would be too many absences otherwise.

                            I hope you mention these potential arguments in the hopes of brainstorming counterarguments, and not because you actually believe them.

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                            • #59
                              I bring these issues up to be sure I am using good, effective wording, good rebuttals, etc
                              Everything I write to ex will be used in court. I'm constantly walking on eggshells.

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                              • #60
                                Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
                                She thinks that she's going to walk in to the SC and bury me for not consenting to group child counselling for children going through divorce. (Witness counselor for children who witness violence holding it. Many children there who actually witnesses violence. D3 has never). Ex describes this as just another playgroup that is healthy for her.
                                To be quite frank... This is a very common tactic that is taken by "domestic violence advocates". Judges see this tactic at least 2-3 times a day. Parent comes in suggesting an inappropriate therapeutic program for children who have been (or witnessed) "domestic violence".

                                Generally, a judge will NOT order a child to attend these "sessions" unless there is a criminal conviction of "domestic violence" or a finding of "abuse" in accordance with rule 24.(4).

                                You sir have neither a criminal conviction nor a finding made in accordance with 24.(4) and the simple argument your lawyer should be presenting is that neither of the conditions for ordering this "therapy" has been met.

                                It is as simple as that. The burden of proof falls on the requesting parent. Furthermore, very few (if any) medical practitioners will recommend children attend these ad-hock "therapy" sessions which have NO CLINICAL COMPONENT to them. If the child needs help and support then it should be provided by a LICENSED AND REGISTERED MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE HEALTH ACT AND OTHER GOVERNING LAWS.

                                I wouldn't focus on the best interests test as the counter argument. The counter argument is that therapy is medical intervention and if needed the family practitioner should first evaluate and provide a medical recommendation for therapy. Until such time that the primary care physician does not recommend it is not needed.

                                Many ill informed "domestic violence negative advocate lawyers" need an update on modern case law and the complexity of medical-legal-orders of this nature.

                                Good Luck!
                                Tayken

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