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  • Fro

    Question about FRO. I've been paying cs now sine dec/2010 never missed payment. Now that the ex cannot get anything but cs she wants to take me to fro. Do I have a choice?? Reason why I dont want to go through FRO is that she lied at every chance and I always had evidence to prove the truth. I can see down the road costing needless payments and being a nightmare every time something does not go her way. Is there anyway I can stop this? Your advise will be greatly apreciated.

  • #2
    I'm not fond of the FRO but what happens is, you pay the FRO, not her. There is nothing for her lie about. "He didn't pay me last month!" Ummm, sorry, he doesn't pay you, he pays the FRO.

    The FRO means that you have even less direct contact with her than before. Just make sure you understand what is going on and when the payments switch over. Get a file number and call the FRO and make sure you are in the loop. What could happen, you pay her for October, and then find the FRO has started charging you that month too.

    If something like that happened, while I would call the FRO and get their word on it, I would more likely just take the ex to small claims court, showing proof she cashed the cheque and showing proof you paid the FRO. Keep detailed bank records, get copies of the cashed cheques from your bank, make sure you write on the cheque "Child Support for Sept."

    Once it is in place, make sure you stay on top of updating your court order according your income each year. When you get to the point when you think the CS should end, start the process ahead of time.

    Always remember the FRO does not make decisions, they enforce existing court orders. There is no use arguing with them unless there is some technical problem like they charge you twice for one month or something. If you need something changed, you go through the courts.

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    • #3
      fro

      I understand how fro works. Is there anyway to stop this from happening as I always paid evry month for 2 years now . I want to know if in our final agreement I can take it out. I dont want to pe part of this system as they seem to charge you for anything and everything. I will have to get a court order that will cost me money again and again has she lies constantly. Seems like systeme is based on trying to suck us dry of our hard earned money.Like I said any way of not having start at all???

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      • #4
        Going to the FRO is her choice. You can have it written into the agreement and filed with the courts that the FRO won't be used, but she can still go FRO, this just forces you to go to court because she breaks the agreement. In which case she says, ok, I don't agree anymore because he was late last month, etc. etc.

        I don't get what you mean by "she lies." Once you are with the FRO, she can't lie. You pay the FRO, that is that, you don't deal with her anymore. She is far more likely to lie if you pay her yourself.

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        • #5
          FRO can only take from you what the court order states.
          FRO also seems to be 3 months behind.
          So if she chooses to go to FRO/Sends them the court order...it will probably be 3 months before she sees any money from them.
          It hits you when they take the money for 3 months, but after that they just take the normal monthly....it isn't that bad...
          I prefer FRO to be involved because it protects me from my ex lying, saying I haven't paid her child support again, as it is all on record through FRO now.

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          • #6
            As long as you have always paid her currently by cheque/have copies of those cheques you are fine.
            In my case, I paid my ex with a mix of cheques and cash(I thought I could trust her at that point---stupid!).
            Then she went to FRO and lied saying I had never ever paid her and wanted to get them involved.
            Fro automatically takes their word, she succeeded at scamming me out of $4,000.
            The copies of cheques I did get that proved some of the support I paid had to be dealt with through lawyers. (FRO will only reimburse you if she admits you paid her to them--my ex ignored all of FRO's letters regarding the cheques I sent them, proving I paid her---so they know she is a scammer/but can't do anything unless she admits it...they told me if we end up in court, they will send a letter, stating that she is uncooperative)

            So now for me having FRO involved...it is a bonus...because she can't ever lie and say I haven't paid her again.

            I currently only give her cheques for monthly babysitting expenses....that way if she ever lies on that...I can get the copies of the cheques from the bank to prove I paid.

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            • #7
              fro

              Thank you for your answers. She basically wanted post dated cheques for a year but her lawyer who won nothing through out the negotiations planted the seed so she could win on something. Like I said FRO is another arm of the system that as its hands in your wallet. So I guess even do I've been pating every month for the last 2 years there is nothing I can do about it, Is that correct??

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              • #8
                That's correct. As Mess said - she's a lot more likely to lie w/you dealing w/her direcly. If, as you say you have always paid on time, every time, you should see this as a bonus - it streamlines pymts and cuts out the bulls*it. Is it b/c you don't want your employer involved? I don't understand, based on your assertion that you pay CS on time, what the problem is. It seems, that the "problem" is her -- well, having FRO handle the pymts eliminates "that problem" - one would think :/

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                • #9
                  You can pay the FRO directly, they do go through the employer by default but you can make arrangements to pay them yourself.

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                  • #10
                    Yes when FRO sends you the paperwork...there is a section that you can fill out for them to take the money out of your bank account.
                    (I Prefer it coming from my work though because I don't want FRO having my bank information)
                    My ex is making A LOT of work for the office ladies at my work with all this FRO stuff.....I just shrug my shoulders at the office ladies, saying "That's what happens when you have 2 kids with someone"
                    and their response is always "NO...we see everything she is taking from you, we know everyone's business here regarding that and none of the other men are paying this much, having this many problems...your ex is a b!tch!" (Nice hearing that come from other women!)

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