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  • Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
    why do you think that her having a job gives her less of a chance for 50/50?
    Where did he say that?

    His ex is saying that her unemployment should be cause for getting sole.

    LF32 is looking for 50-50, and doesn't believe he should be denied 50-50 based on the crime of him having a job.

    LF32, I'll apologize in advance if you have blocked this one too.

    Comment


    • Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
      While I agree that it's a person's choice whether or not to work, when it becomes a legal tactic for custody then it becomes an issue. My ex has in her affidavit: "I will be staying home for the next 2 years. I will not be placing D3 in school for the next 2 years. D3 has an attachment issue and can only be away from me for spurts at a time.

      (Note: D3 has never asked about her mom .. nor to even call her on any visit).

      My point is .. she has a degree. She can get off welfare and get a job if she chooses. But why would she? Then no LAO. Then no Welfare. Less CS. Less chance of 50/50 (IMO). All Im saying is why use every financial assistance program in Ontario when she doesn't have to? Court tactics.

      My lawyer says the same thing as Stripes. "Judges are cognizant that parents work". Guess Im just nervous a judge will say what Links just said above.

      Paris:
      Lawyer tells me not to just register D3 without mothers knowledge. That I'll look like a jerk.

      Dinky:
      Catholic school board offers a great French immersion (half day eng/half French) and catchment area is large.

      I'm very nervous to see what will happen next Monday at SC.
      maybe strait you can apologize to me now for you lack of reading??? He didn't say that she would have less chance of sole and the whole paragraph dealt with the mothers reasons.

      Comment


      • Well, why would I apologize for asking a simple question?

        I was genuinely asking "where he said it". You provided a quote that clarifies it, so I will thank you for providing it.

        Not sure why I should apologize for asking a question that you then answered.

        Comment


        • Originally posted by Straittohell View Post
          Well, why would I apologize for asking a simple question?

          I was genuinely asking "where he said it". You provided a quote that clarifies it, so I will thank you for providing it.

          Not sure why I should apologize for asking a question that you then answered.
          instead of being all over me about where did he say that, you should of taken then time to read his post that I was responding to.

          You then put down how his ex said she should get sole based of the fact she doesn't work. How LF32 shouldn't be denied 50/50 because he works. Yes that maybe true but it had nothing to do with the post I was responding to and the assumption that LF32 made in that post.

          Comment


          • The wonderful world of cyberspace. Sometimes we miss stuff. No biggy.

            I have a workable parenting plan and good supports. But that's ex's argument. Why would childcare look after D3 before her? That's her case.

            Im saying .. she would need childcare too if she got a job .. then that couldn't be her case for why 50/50 wouldn't work. So ... she's deciding not to work for the next 2 years. She put that in black and white. Why? For positioning. She's "always available".

            Stripes made good points though about role models, etc.
            Last edited by LovingFather32; 11-24-2014, 09:31 PM.

            Comment


            • Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
              instead of being all over me about where did he say that, you should of taken then time to read his post that I was responding to.

              You then put down how his ex said she should get sole based of the fact she doesn't work. How LF32 shouldn't be denied 50/50 because he works. Yes that maybe true but it had nothing to do with the post I was responding to and the assumption that LF32 made in that post.
              I wasn't "all over you", I was outlining my understanding of what was in the thread.

              I clearly missed it. I clearly asked for you to show me where it was.

              Not sure what else I am to do. Enjoy your evening.

              Comment


              • My ex leveraged her unemployment to get sole custody temporarily, we will see in a few months what happens.

                Comment


                • Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
                  The wonderful world of cyberspace. Sometimes we miss stuff. No biggy.

                  I have a workable parenting plan and good supports. But that's ex's argument. Why would childcare look after D3 before her? That's her case.

                  Im saying .. she would need childcare too if she got a job .. then that couldn't be her case for why 50/50 wouldn't work. So ... she's deciding not to work for the next 2 years. She put that in black and white. Why? For positioning. She's "always available".

                  Stripes made good points though about role models, etc.
                  Isn't her degree only good in Quebec? Not sure how long it would take to retrain as a paralegal in Ontario but be prepared in case she requests you pay for her retraining.

                  I know that many times people have been on here complaining their ex is using daycare instead of letting them look after the kids when they are available. My personal opinion its better for a parent to look after the kids when available but that's me.

                  As for role models, that's a tough one. I grew up with alcoholic, pack a day smokers for parents. I don't smoke and have a glass of wine every couple of months. My mom didn't work till I was 16. I am not a big believer in role models. A person is in charge of their own life and to blame the father or mother etc for how they turned out is a cop out. Its their excuse for not trying harder in life. No one can say that a stay at home parent is better then a working one. It all depends on the people.

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
                    Isn't her degree only good in Quebec? Not sure how long it would take to retrain as a paralegal in Ontario but be prepared in case she requests you pay for her retraining.

                    I know that many times people have been on here complaining their ex is using daycare instead of letting them look after the kids when they are available. My personal opinion its better for a parent to look after the kids when available but that's me.

                    As for role models, that's a tough one. I grew up with alcoholic, pack a day smokers for parents. I don't smoke and have a glass of wine every couple of months. My mom didn't work till I was 16. I am not a big believer in role models. A person is in charge of their own life and to blame the father or mother etc for how they turned out is a cop out. Its their excuse for not trying harder in life. No one can say that a stay at home parent is better then a working one. It all depends on the people.
                    Actually, it's proven that past childhood experiences and parental role models play a large role in future development. Your aversion to alcohol is a prime example.

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
                      Actually, it's proven that past childhood experiences and parental role models play a large role in future development. Your aversion to alcohol is a prime example.
                      I really don't believe that stuff. I am who I am because this is who I decided to be. If my parents were such I big influence on me then I would of turned out like them. I had my issues in my teens but I realized the path I was on and changed my life. I am my own person due to my beliefs etc.

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
                        I really don't believe that stuff. I am who I am because this is who I decided to be. If my parents were such I big influence on me then I would of turned out like them. I had my issues in my teens but I realized the path I was on and changed my life. I am my own person due to my beliefs etc.
                        Your personal experience isn't the rule..... Thats what studies, statistics and sociologists are for. Sure you turned out ok because not everybody is the same but 9/10 people (or whatever the stat is don't ). It is a supported statistical truth - you are the 1/10 congrats. Personally, I feel the same way as you but that isn't the case with many otehrs.


                        I know that many times people have been on here complaining their ex is using daycare instead of letting them look after the kids when they are available. My personal opinion its better for a parent to look after the kids when available but that's me.
                        Agreed but caring for the kids shouldn't inhibit them from trying to get full-time work.

                        Comment


                        • "I really don't believe that stuff"


                          Believe it or not .. every behavior you have is learned. The microsystem that taught you it was your family. Peers took over the teaching process when school started.
                          Your hippocampus holds your memories, many unconscious, which is why you may feel your parents had nothing to do with the person you are today.

                          If you read up nature vs. nurture literature you will be surprized to see that both contribute heavily to the person you are, whether you like it or not.
                          Last edited by LovingFather32; 11-24-2014, 11:51 PM.

                          Comment


                          • Goldilocks not having a JOB is something to touch on, but it's all in how it's presented (I assume) it's more of a side issue.

                            The primary test...is the CLRA "act as a parent" (which includes the domestic abuse crap)

                            Passing the "act as a parent criteria", is added too....what's in the best interests of the child

                            Poor folk (system manipulators) (deadbeat dads that don't pay support) still can be custodial parents and deadbeat dads are entitled to access.

                            But here.... somebody tried to get the upper hand in child custody, it's impossible to gloss over, and that same person is maintaining the battle lines.
                            Working LF32 and welfare recipient mom.. being equal as too "best interests of the child" makes a Judge look for a deciding factor... the "friendly parent" the one that'll promote contact and access to the other parent.

                            Here Goldilocks has a problem ...no access for 7 months until it's imposed by Court Order.

                            Goldilocks (the desperate gambler) has no fixed address..no status quo..her bags are always packed for Quebec ..and she'll throw some type of parenting plan together ( which is a big mistake)

                            Where's the job? or retraining? or daycare when a job is obtained, the future school for D3, extended family involvement, doctor (no doc in 7 months but has a walk in clinic), dentist, even a present address!......this is where a Judge after a few questions will poke holes in EX's parenting plan......playgroup that's all EX has

                            EX is in transition...it'll be clear to any Judge that the EX .. NOT having a job, sitting on welfare, with a free lawyer, continuing the conflict.. THAT to the EX games are more important than the child's best interests.

                            It's doubtful the SC/TMC judge is going to understand why settlement hasn't happened between parties particularly after the Motion.

                            Of course the only way or excuse the OP can use...is using the same old tired victim position and that the Motion Judge..."got it wrong"...(big mistake number 2)

                            OP can't "fight the decision" but they can play games and fight indirectly by ignoring past Judges..and making a run for Trial,

                            The Motion Judge spent a long time deliberating the matter...he got it right.

                            It'll be interesting to see how creative the SC/Judge will get

                            TOOT the new promotion. extra benefits.....plus time off..HORN....always appear to want settlement.
                            Last edited by MrToronto; 11-25-2014, 01:20 AM.

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                            • Evening

                              "...My ex has in her affidavit: "I will be staying home for the next 2 years. I will not be placing D3 in school for the next 2 years. D3 has an attachment issue and can only be away from me for spurts at a time...."

                              I think LF32's ex is going to make a huge blunder if she uses the child's "attachment issue" as an excuse to stay home/not return to work. OMG is she going to use this excuse when the child is old enough to go to grade school? IF this is in her affidavit I wonder why no one zeroed in on this. IMO this is yet another indication of mother's mental health not being quite all there.

                              Congratulations on your new job LF32!

                              Comment


                              • Um, as a taxpayer, this pisses me off. Why does she deserve to stay home on welfare while countless other parents with kids who have "attachment issues" go to work? Shoot, my nieces and nephews all had "attachment issues" and their moms detached them and went back to work. Its called life! I really hope the judge sees through this. It just never ends with this woman!

                                Comment

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