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  • Child Care receipts: seems like something isn't adding up

    My Husband has been receiving invoices for Child Care fees via email. Their Daughter attends a child care provider within her school. For some reason they have always been forwarded from the X's boyfriends work email and we believe that they are created by the boyfriend using his work's invoices because it includes things like, 'Order Number, Sold To, Ship to, Ship Date, etc.'

    My Husband asked X to please provide him with a copy of the original invoices from the Day Care, as well as a copy of the receipts each month. She cannot provide either. Is she not required to provide one of the two? She insists that she does not receive receipts from the provider, that they give her a bill and she makes the payments, that she only receives the tax receipt. Is it just us or does something not sound right here? How come we cannot have a copy of the original invoice? Why does the boyfriend forward a copy he has created?

    Would it be within my Husband's rights to go to the school and request a copy of receipts? This would make things easier.

  • #2
    I would contact the school directly and see what information he can get from them. They can at least tell him how billing is generally done for the childcare. Always best to go right to the source to get the truth.

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    • #3
      I guess it can't hurt to try. I imagine if X get's wind of it though she'll declare WWIII

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      • #4
        Yes, this is correct.

        Bills for fees are issued monthly.

        Big licensed daycares almost always just offer one legal tax receipt at the end of the year.

        Parents lose them if they are issued monthly and it is a big pain in the butt for daycare to reissue them at tax time.

        I would simply keep the receipts from ex and then ask that the final official tax receipt be issued in his name for the portion he paid or in both of their names if they both pay. At least he has something that acknowledges he gave her money.

        Now she needs to provide him an offical receipt for taxes. This should include the daycare's business number or if it is a private babysitter, a SIN number.

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        • #5
          We will make contact with the Child Care Supervisor on Monday. Thank you for the help!

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          • #6
            Request a copy of her income tax return, not just the NOA. The return will detail the amount of child care she paid, and the tax refund she should have received as a result. The father should not be paying based on the total amount, he should be paying a share of the amount after the tax refund. He has every right to know the after tax cost.

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            • #7
              RLS: do you think your husband's ex could be dishonest?

              What a concept! (ex husband dishonest). Wow!

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              • #8
                Keep us posted on the outcome of this.
                I have ranted numerous times about my own situation with this on here.
                My ex does not send our kids to a licensed daycare facility. She sends them to a lady's house that babysits.
                Ex wants me to pay her monthly but refuses to provide a receipt addressed to her signed from the babysitter proving that she has paid a monthly amount to someone.
                Our agreement states that ex will pay the babysitter and provide me with a receipt on a monthly basis, I then calculate my proportional share and am to pay her within 20 days of being advised by the amount.
                Then it goes on to say that we will also each obtain a separate receipt at the end of the year from the babysitter.
                (I guess for tax claiming purposes...BUT I do not have shared or 40% access with the kids...so I don't get to claim anything..which means for me receiving a receipt from the babysitter is useless as I have never paid the babysitter/never been billed by the babysitter and can't claim anything on taxes)
                I *think* I should be entitled to 12 monthly copies of receipts addressed to my ex signed from the babysitter with the amount she charged ex/proving ex is paying this monthly bill that I reimburse her my proportional share for.

                We had a 4 way lawyer meeting to settle this--make the amendment regarding it...all of that was explained to ex that she needed to provide me with those monthly receipts. This was supposed to start in January 2011....for that whole year I have received no receipts.
                My lawyer informed ex's lawyer of the problem twice...still no proper receipts were given to me (ex did give me 3 receipts Jan/Feb/March--but they were receipts she wrote out herself to me for the amount I paid ex----why would I pay ex to babysit our own kids??? )

                Now ex just e-mailed me asking me to give her the break down of what I paid every month so babysitter can write me a receipt
                I told ex that I do not require a receipt from the babysitter--as I never paid the babysitter any money/was never billed by the babysitter...and I can't claim what I've paid on taxes.
                But I do require 12 monthly copies of receipts to ex from babysitter proving that ex was paying someone/see if what I've paid matches up correctly.

                I don't understand how we can be required to pay monthly if we receive no monthly receipt as proof that they've paid??? If they wait until the end of the year to provide a receipt...then why can't we pay at the end of the year upon receiving that proof?

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                • #9
                  Because the invoices have been recreated and emailed to us via X's boyfriend's email, because X won't just simply give us a photocopy of the original monthly invoices from the daycare, we're led to believe that something is off. She wrote yesterday morning that she will bring a copy of the original invoice when meeting at halfway point to drop off D6...and she forgot to bring it with her. "I forgot. I will bring it Sunday." Does she have something to hide? Maybe, maybe not. We're wondering if this "original invoice" is just a copy of what the boyfriend emails us, or if it's the actual invoice from the daycare. We'll see Sunday...maybe.

                  As mentioned before, we will contact the daycare supervisor on Monday and see what information he can give us. Hopefully, he can put our suspicions to rest. We're hoping at least he can tell us how the monthly costs are determined. Is there only a charge for days when care was required? I know that many providers also charge for days when care was not required. If this is the case, then the monthly costs can easily be figured out.

                  MESS - My Husband and X split the costs of childcare 50/50. He was not aware that he should be paying half of the after tax costs. I guess there's a lot we need to learn. Geez. I can say with confidence, she's not going to take this without argument. I can imagine now the emails upon emails and text msgs that we're going to receive. Not fun.

                  KNACKERED - What is so difficult about providing a receipt from the sitter with the amount that X paid, you pay her your portion and she signs a receipt showing that you made that payment. Erg! I'm having a hard time understanding why these oh-so-simple matters have to be turned into something so difficult...I can only guess that they have something to hide. What other reason is there for the runaround? I wish I had some advice for you, Knackered, but as you can see, we're just as frustrated and trying to figure it all out, too. I can only share with you what's unfolding on our end and hope that it's of some help to you. Please do share what happens on your end.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by RLS View Post
                    Erg! I'm having a hard time understanding why these oh-so-simple matters have to be turned into something so difficult.
                    I know your question was rhetorical, but I'll answer anyway......

                    ...........because some individuals enjoy being a d!ck and creating conflict.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by firhill View Post
                      I know your question was rhetorical, but I'll answer anyway......

                      ...........because some individuals enjoy being a d!ck and creating conflict.
                      lol Yes, I understand that one might get a small thrill out of making things difficult for the other, but, at some point wouldn't they tire out? At some point you think they'd consider how much of their own energy and how much of their own time they've wasted with the pettiness and snap out of it.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by RLS View Post
                        lol Yes, I understand that one might get a small thrill out of making things difficult for the other, but, at some point wouldn't they tire out? At some point you think they'd consider how much of their own energy and how much of their own time they've wasted with the pettiness and snap out of it.
                        Unfortunately that is wishful thinking... One thing I have learned is that some people are happy just complaining and being miserable... Best way to deal with them, smile and move on!

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                        • #13
                          I go through a similar process once a year. Ex is supposed to provide all original invoices for business to me. Ex's g/f has a habit of providing photocopied invoices. I reject these. Why? Because Liquid Paper was invented back in the 1970s and is still readily available and used today.

                          Honest people simply turn receipts over. When people, like my ex, spend time attempting to reproduce receipts you can be sure they are not legitimate.

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                          • #14
                            ^ No, you never turn originals over to anyone. You retain originals for future audits.

                            Copies are fine. If you don't trust your ex and want them verified, take the copy to the service provider and have them intitialed as accurate. Or demand notarized copies. The last thing I would ever give my ex is my original, and I wouldn't expect an original from my ex. It's not a question of trust, it's a matter of your own diligence in maintaining your own records.

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                            • #15
                              We are only asking for a copy of the original invoice, not one that's recreated by X's boyfriend.

                              "Take the copy to the service provider and have them intitialed as accurate. Or demand notarized copies." Good idea, thank you.

                              Also, it's been brought to our attention that we are expected to pay our portion of the total AFTER tax deductions. Is this still the case if we only have access? And, how would this work if we are expected to pay our portion of the costs monthly? Any suggestions?

                              Comment

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