Folks - my STBX (separated 2 1/2 years)and I wrapped up mediation and both received our memorandum of understanding. That was a month ago. As suggested by the mediator, we both forwarded our respective copies to our lawyer. I did immediately, and assumed my ex did as well.
I then was asked to sign off on the Form13-Financial Statement, and my lawyers office sent copies to the lawyer that my ex listed to both the mediator and I. The following Monday I get a call from my lawyers office stating that the lawyer she listed is not even retained by her. When I called my ex about this, she claimed surprise at the cost and concept of a retainer, and sought other options like Justice.net as well as a family layer her brother deals with.
She said she'd emailed a lawyer for retainer cost (Tuesday , I believe), and when I suggested Thursday that she should follow up, she blew me off and hung up on me. All through the entire process, she has had no sense of urgency or any desire to be knowledgeable on the process. It's been a half-*ssed effort to say the least, and everything's taken much longer than it should.
I honestly don't know if she's being deliberately obstructionist, or simply disorganized. I'm not asking for anyone here to tell me which, but I'm trying to get a feel for my options.
As I understand it, once the financials are sworn and exchanged by each party, one of our lawyers will draw up the separation agreement (we agreed to share the cost), then we file for divorce. This is the path I prefer, as it keeps costs down.
However, I do not want this dragging on. I just want it done so I can move on with my new relationship. I've been cooperative, generous and agreeable in negotiations thus far, but am frustrated by her delays. Should she be putting up roadblocks, I'm thinking of my plan B.
That Plan B would be to ask my lawyer to draw up the separation agreement based on the memorandum of understanding, and file for divorce. How would that work procedurally? I know she'd be very hard pressed to afford a legal battle, and I'm not keen on it myself, but I just want this over.
Thoughts....? Other options?
I then was asked to sign off on the Form13-Financial Statement, and my lawyers office sent copies to the lawyer that my ex listed to both the mediator and I. The following Monday I get a call from my lawyers office stating that the lawyer she listed is not even retained by her. When I called my ex about this, she claimed surprise at the cost and concept of a retainer, and sought other options like Justice.net as well as a family layer her brother deals with.
She said she'd emailed a lawyer for retainer cost (Tuesday , I believe), and when I suggested Thursday that she should follow up, she blew me off and hung up on me. All through the entire process, she has had no sense of urgency or any desire to be knowledgeable on the process. It's been a half-*ssed effort to say the least, and everything's taken much longer than it should.
I honestly don't know if she's being deliberately obstructionist, or simply disorganized. I'm not asking for anyone here to tell me which, but I'm trying to get a feel for my options.
As I understand it, once the financials are sworn and exchanged by each party, one of our lawyers will draw up the separation agreement (we agreed to share the cost), then we file for divorce. This is the path I prefer, as it keeps costs down.
However, I do not want this dragging on. I just want it done so I can move on with my new relationship. I've been cooperative, generous and agreeable in negotiations thus far, but am frustrated by her delays. Should she be putting up roadblocks, I'm thinking of my plan B.
That Plan B would be to ask my lawyer to draw up the separation agreement based on the memorandum of understanding, and file for divorce. How would that work procedurally? I know she'd be very hard pressed to afford a legal battle, and I'm not keen on it myself, but I just want this over.
Thoughts....? Other options?
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