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  • #16
    Originally posted by shellshocked22 View Post


    Basically, I think all women are a little (lot) nutty so the next one will likely not be much better lol.
    i really hope you were kidding about that remark.

    Comment


    • #17
      The situation you are in is not an easy one. I myself am fairly new to this forum, having separated in May from a 17 year relationship (9yrs married), but I can tell you that you will find a great deal of amazing advice on this forum.

      For my two cents, I would seriously recommend the personal counselling, if nothing else this will help you in the long run, getting your own issues resolved/managed/under control will help you and that may just lead to a better relationship with your wife and kids.

      Also, explore the marriage counselling, you owe it to yourself, your wife and your family to see if there is anything left to save. I know for myself, I had to go, I knew that I would never forgive myself if I did not try everything to save my marriage and family before it was too late. As it turns out, it was not the solution for us, but I still had to try.

      Stay strong, this will not correct itself overnight.

      Angie

      Comment


      • #18
        Originally Posted by shellshocked22

        Basically, I think all women are a little (lot) nutty so the next one will likely not be much better lol.



        Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
        i really hope you were kidding about that remark.


        I really don't think he was kidding.

        As all men are self-centred, egotistical, single-minded sex maniacs who only think of their own gratification and needs.

        Man was put on this earth to provide - and now they think they deserve thanks for their efforts - hahahahaha - for those that acutally make the effort.

        So - shut up shellshocked and get a life - and if you really worked your balls off - then you wouldn't be in the mess your in!

        Comment


        • #19
          Originally posted by punked View Post
          Originally Posted by shellshocked22

          Basically, I think all women are a little (lot) nutty so the next one will likely not be much better lol.





          I really don't think he was kidding.

          As all men are self-centred, egotistical, single-minded sex maniacs who only think of their own gratification and needs.

          Man was put on this earth to provide - and now they think they deserve thanks for their efforts - hahahahaha - for those that acutally make the effort.

          So - shut up shellshocked and get a life - and if you really worked your balls off - then you wouldn't be in the mess your in!
          I really hope you are kidding here, right ?

          Comment


          • #20
            Hello Billm:

            Well, I guess we'll have to agree to disagree. No offense, but I'm guessing the amount of CS and SS you pay is not that large given the salary you earn. Let's be clear that I'm not proposing that ex partners and kids be thrown to the curb with no support. It just upsets me that they are given an obscene amount (I won't tell you numbers but lets just say her "support" is more than most two wage families earn and that's with her staying home and watching tv all day.

            However, when the "higher wage earner" (have to be gender neutral of course) basically gives up a large portion of his/her free time, makes sacrifices to earn an above average income, spends years earning a post secondary degree rather than "partying" all the time, then excuse me, I think that person shouldn't be "robbed". Why do so many people in Canada think its right to discourage hard work ?

            I can appreciate some people think anyone who earns above average income doesn't "deserve" it and its right for the govt and family law to take it all away. Yes, I believe in the free market system where hard work is rewarded, call me crazy.

            Let me put it this way, let's say you took a job that was VERY stressful to you, required double the number of hours per week but had a big pay day. Your ex is getting more money in support than most families earn with two breadwinners. Furthermore, your ex then decides its not worth her time to work since you're giving her so much money its not necessary.

            Are you saying you don't think BOTH parents have an obligation to support their kids ? What is your response when a spouse basically says that they won't bother to get a job since you're giving them so much money they don't need to work but they appreciate you working so hard for them.

            Again, sounds like you are fortunate that your ex is prudent with the support money you have paid. Let's just assume you know for a fact that your ex is foolishly spending "child support" money on luxuries for him/her rather than the children. Are you REALLY fine with that ?

            Am I wrong to expect the "child support" to be spent on the children as opposed to indulgences for the ex ?

            Again, I'm think you're assuming all exes are wonderful, reasonable and wouldn't dream of wasting CS on themselves. You are very lucky you hvae such a perfect ex wife (I wonder why you guys got divorced, she sounds great by the way). Do you honestly believe all exes are that reasonable? Do you honestly believe the system is truly fair to the wage earner WHEN there is a HUGE gap in income. I agree if both partners make similar money THEN its not too bad a deal, I wish to hell my ex DID earn similar money to me then we could basically shake hands and call it a day.

            To those members who were foolish enough to work hard and have a spouse who didn't have a similar income, GIVE YOUR INPUT ! Do you think the system is as fair as our friend BillM thinks ? Do you think its right there be NO accountability as to how CS is spent. I would like to hear others in my situation give their thoughts.

            Yes, I'm outlining a worse case scenario, but I also think BillM is outlining a Best case scenario. Too bad the rose coloured glasses don't apply in my case but I'm envious of him though lol.

            Comment


            • #21
              Originally posted by WorkingDAD View Post
              I really hope you are kidding here, right ?
              TeeeHeee

              Of course I'm kidding.



              I love men .... they are sooo gullible. Even Justin Bieber can't manage to stay away from the "baby daddy" accusations

              I take comfort in the fact that men who pick "nutters" deserve "nutters"

              Comment


              • #22
                You,re actions and emotional feelings towards you spouse are probably a reaction to your not being able to cope with your situation financialy. Couple that with anger management issues and your a ticking emetional time bomb.

                You are just as responsible for your debt as she is. You are both financialy irressponsible. She spend, you say nothing. You spend, she says nothing.

                Best bet if your honest about YOUR situation and are ready to make changes but she isn't ??..... Get help for youself. Learn to manage you anger and your approche, you may see a positive change in her towards you and your ideas. If she is indifferent to your conserns about finances and is unwilling to make personal changes then its up to you to deside if you want to stay in a stressfull relationship.

                Don't forget. You have young eyes watching. Your actions and reactions are teaching your children how to cope with problems latter on in life.

                The stats are still proving it's an uphill battle for men to have equal rights in our Family Law system. SEEK LEGAL HELP BEFORE YOU MAKE ANY DESISIONS!!!!!

                Comment

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