Hi everyone! I am a new member 2 this website. This is my 1st post. I wanted 2 share my story with u all and look forward 2 receiving your replies. Well, i have been married for a little over a year now. And soon after the marriage, when i moved in with my husband into my in-laws house, shortly after troubles began with me and my in-laws.
My father in-law is very controlling and dominating. He is constantly interfering with our lives and has made my life hell! He controls my husband’s money, as in his bank account and gives him allowance money 2 spend from his own earnings! This has created issues between me and husband and our spending. Starting from grocery shopping 2 eating out etc. His dad always wants an account of everything we did and what we spend where. And on top of all of that he likes 2 complain and criticize on our spending. And the sad part in all of this is, that my husband cannot speak up 2 his father and set some clear boundaries for us.
There r many examples like the one i just mentioned where my in-laws constantly meddle with our lives. But the problem is that my husband doesn't see it like that. Instead he is accustomed 2 the way his dad is and doesn't see anything wrong in his behavior. And he is 2 scared of his dad 2 speak up and say anything 2 him. Thus, this has been an ongoing problem in our relationship.
I've tried 2 address this issue among other issues numerous times but 2 no avail. And things only seemed 2 pile up over time, to a point that i could not take it anymore.
Since a little over 4 months, we have been living separately and i have finally decided 2 take the huge and difficult step of considering 2 divorce him. I spoke 2 him about how i was feeling, and that i was beginning 2 consider divorce as a probable course of action in the near future. And he recently told me that he also feels that getting a divorce seems like the only solution left at this time, since moving out and having our own place is out of the cards for him. Since he feels he cannot turn his back on his parents and have his own life with his wife. And i certainly cannot go back 2 the house and live with my in-laws.
Now that we r at this crossroad, the reality of the situation has really hit home for me and i am finding it very hard 2 let go off him and our life together. Knowing that we love each other and want 2 be together, but cannot seem 2 be able 2 come 2 a compromise which works well for both of us.
I would really appreciate some feedback from anyone who can relate 2 my situation and what i am feeling and offer me some advice. I feel like i am in a bind at the moment, any suggestions would be a great emotional help..thanks!
My father in-law is very controlling and dominating. He is constantly interfering with our lives and has made my life hell! He controls my husband’s money, as in his bank account and gives him allowance money 2 spend from his own earnings! This has created issues between me and husband and our spending. Starting from grocery shopping 2 eating out etc. His dad always wants an account of everything we did and what we spend where. And on top of all of that he likes 2 complain and criticize on our spending. And the sad part in all of this is, that my husband cannot speak up 2 his father and set some clear boundaries for us.
There r many examples like the one i just mentioned where my in-laws constantly meddle with our lives. But the problem is that my husband doesn't see it like that. Instead he is accustomed 2 the way his dad is and doesn't see anything wrong in his behavior. And he is 2 scared of his dad 2 speak up and say anything 2 him. Thus, this has been an ongoing problem in our relationship.
I've tried 2 address this issue among other issues numerous times but 2 no avail. And things only seemed 2 pile up over time, to a point that i could not take it anymore.
Since a little over 4 months, we have been living separately and i have finally decided 2 take the huge and difficult step of considering 2 divorce him. I spoke 2 him about how i was feeling, and that i was beginning 2 consider divorce as a probable course of action in the near future. And he recently told me that he also feels that getting a divorce seems like the only solution left at this time, since moving out and having our own place is out of the cards for him. Since he feels he cannot turn his back on his parents and have his own life with his wife. And i certainly cannot go back 2 the house and live with my in-laws.
Now that we r at this crossroad, the reality of the situation has really hit home for me and i am finding it very hard 2 let go off him and our life together. Knowing that we love each other and want 2 be together, but cannot seem 2 be able 2 come 2 a compromise which works well for both of us.
I would really appreciate some feedback from anyone who can relate 2 my situation and what i am feeling and offer me some advice. I feel like i am in a bind at the moment, any suggestions would be a great emotional help..thanks!
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