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  • #16
    Billie - The intake form is available online if you want to take a look at it.

    Ministry of the Attorney General - Intake Form for Custody/Access

    The judge does have to order it. I didn't waste my money with having my lawyer help me fill it out.

    Its hit and miss with any court documents, sometimes judges read it, sometimes not. My lawyer always gives me the *lowdown* on the judge, and gives her opinion on whether or not the judge will have read the documents provided. Both female judges have read the documents in my case - Thank goodness.

    FWIW - All exs medical documents were ordered to be released to me due to child safety so don't be surprised if your ex goes down that path but you could always request the same.

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    • #17
      If he requested medical documentation I have nothing to hide. I have been seeing counsellors, but I have already recieved glowing reviews and letters from them stating that I am coping very well with the situation and doing everything I can to help my daughter.

      If this does happen I will be requesting his medical documents. He was seeing a Pschychiatrist and I don't know if he was ever dignosed. I suspect he either is bipolar or may have borderline-personality disorder. Regardless, it would prove that he indeed does have clinical depression , as he claims that he was never depressed. If he goes down this road then he is taking a big chance. I really don't get why his lawyer would tell him it was a good idea???

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      • #18
        If you are getting close to what you want in terms of custody, access and support, and are not concerned that the child would be in danger, then there is no reason to get the OCL involved. You simply draft an agreement and have him and his lawyer sign it or propose ammendments. If they propose unreasonable changes or won't sign but have no valid reason, then you make a motion for what you want in court. If what you want is based on a status quo that he has accepted and if he has no grounds for opposing it, then you should get what you want and he will be ordered to pay court costs.

        My wife had the OCL involved twice and the investigator was very professional, and this is what eventually led her ex to agree to joint-shared custody. He had accused my wife of being mentally unstable, but after two psychiatric evaluations, two OCL investigations and a bunch of illegal and immoral tactics on his part, he ran out of room to keep opposing it.

        We are now dealing with FRO and trying to get them to fix the mess they made of this case since my wife changed from being the payor to the payee.

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        • #19
          Grover, I have already sent him 2 offers that were very reasonable and pretty much status Quo. I filed for custody and had an emergency motion where an order was made for joint custody with 50/50 time and gave me the responsibility for health, counselling and ordered him to give consent.

          He has no reason to even proceed with the court because he is not going to get anything more that 50/50 and joint custody (which is what we have) Getting the OCL involved is a waste of time and taxpayers money, and it will only end up either recommending SQ or something more in my favour.

          I only have some small concerns that he may end up emotionally abusing her like he did to me. But I don't think it will happen ( he realized what he was doing to me and has not treated her that way, to my knowledge). Yes, it's possible, but if it is going to happen it will, regardless of how much time she is with him. That possiblity will not do anything to change the situation. I don't feel that having the OCL involved will be of any benefit to him and not likely to benefit me.

          I am reluctant to go to court to have FRO involved as well. This year I am paying the offset amount, but his wage has increased and it is likely that he will have to pay me next year. I don't want them involved since there is good chance that our wages will change again and I know how hard it is to make changes with them. Just not worth the hassle.

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          • #20
            If you are happy with the status quo, then just reply that you disagree with his opinion on getting the OCL involved and suggest that he sign the proposed settlement. If he refuses to sign, then the status quo will work for now. If he wants to go to court to ask for OCL involvement, just come with a good argument that while you are not opposed, you don't think it is necessary. He will likely be ordered to pay costs for bringing the case to court when it was not necessary, or you could choose to file a cross motion to implement your latest offer, based on his lack of any substantial response.

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            • #21
              I'm thinking that if we actually get to trial he could possibly end up paying a lot of my costs. I offered him joint custody and 50/50 from the beginning!

              I did tell him when he brought up the topic of the OCL that I did not think it was necessary.

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