Decision making re child's medical treatment

[Lindsay]

Some of you may be following the Tina Carlsen case.

Case tests roles of parents, doctors

Carlsen's doctor alerted Child Protective Services at least three times after Carlsen sought to treat her son with natural remedies instead of surgery. The child's parents asked to see another physician, but Dr. Nicole Becker stayed involved...

Baby Riley to have surgery

Judge John McCarthy said he is convinced that the surgery is in the best interest of the child, Riley Rogers....

The parents may also have trouble trusting doctors because when their baby was born, they were told they should "take him home and love him" because he would live for only a few weeks, their attorneys said.

I was interested to see whether any of our members have run into a similar (and hopefully much less extreme) situation.

How do our members feel about following the advice of their children's physicians? In what situations would you insist on a second opinion? In what situations would you deal with a possibly serious illness yourself without the advice of a physician?

[logicalvelocity]

Lindsay,

Fortunately, I have complete faith in the physicians that are involved in my son's life. They answer every question I have. At some point you have to trust a medical professional. If I do have any doubt, I would seek a second independent opinion.

lv

[DadofTwoGirls]

I am in a situation today regarding this subject. My 8 year old daughter has been sick for three weeks not with a fever and cough. She has lost 9 lbs and was very slim to begin with.

I have taken her to the Dr three times. She went to her mom's Mon without a fever but she became more sick again today and had to be picked up from school.

Her Dr called me yesterday to see how she was doing. After explaining, she said to bring her in if she doesn't improve. Now she is worse.

I think she should have gone to the Dr or the hospital today. Her mom is saying she will take her Fri. This is against my wishes and what the Dr recommended.

I told ex what Dr recommended and I asked the Dr to call her directly.

I am very worried about my daughter. A flu-like illness for three weeks is troubling which is why the Dr called. Now the ex is going to delay taking her back to get looked at.

Question:

Is there any way I can force the visit to the doctor tomorrow - Jan 11?

There is a history with a lack of reasonable judgement when it comes to the children's illness and the ex's decision making process.

Would it be worth it for the sake of one day? My thought is that first, she should have gone today and second, by seeing the Dr tomorrow, she might be able to see a specialist before the weekend.

Any points of view would be appreciated.

[DadofTwoGirls]

Update:

After the last post, I contacted the doctor and received the results of the chest x-ray confirming pneuomnia in my daughter.

After explaining the communication challenges in the parenting arrangement, the Dr called my daughter's mom directly. The end result was that she took my daughter that day for a re-assessment.

All is well except my other daughter now has pneumonia also.

I find it frustrating when my kids' medical care is not being taken care of as I see as appropriate and necessary. But, at the end of the day, as long as they are cared for in a reasonable way then it's all good. Even if I don't agree, I must consider the ex's intended course of action in these matters and assess that against the objective and not against my assessment of her or her judgement.

In this case, I remained objective and even though my ex sent a last little dig at me when agreeing to go to the doc immediately, I didn't take the bait and engage in an emotional exchange.

From the start of this, my objective was to get my daughter to the Dr ASAP and the objective was achieved. The girls are doing ok and they are being closely followed by capable physicians.

From this experience I will take the lessons learned and keep them for future use.

Cheers