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    just wanted to say HI....and had a Q
    So...I have been separated for a month...my husband has told me I don't have a leg to stand on when it come to our home...we used his mother credit score to get a low mortgage rate....she singed to doc. with the lawyer one that the house can not be sold with out me...and that she was a renter and responsible for he mortgage.....we have two kids....his a steroid user...works for corrections... he wants me to leave....Not sure were I stand...been a home maker for ten years....
    Last edited by bern; 12-17-2009, 11:55 PM. Reason: added more info..

  • #2
    kinda hard to read

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    • #3
      I have been married for 14 yrs, my husband after a big fight that involved the police (he pushed me to the floor) I did not charge. He already had been to court regarding an assault on an inmate) we paid a fine which got him out of probation. Explained to the police officer what had happened, showed him the steroids that my husband has been on for the past 13yrs, so this time of the year its always hard to live with him. Believe me I know I am not perfect but I really do belief that this habit has coast me my marriage. And his mother living in our home for the past 7 yrs has added to it.

      He told me we are separated which was a month ago. When we purchased our home we used his mother credit score to get a good mortgage rate, ( 3 yrs ago)at the signing of the house the lawyer had her sign and agreement that she (mother in-law) was not responsible for the mortgage (three of us singed this document) and that she was a renter.

      What are my rights when it come to my kids and losing our home?
      I have been home with the kid for the past 11 yrs.

      I hope this is better.
      Thanks for any info…

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      • #4
        so whose name exactly is on the mortgage and title to the house?

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        • #5
          my husband and his mother are on the mortage.

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          • #6
            Doesn't matter who's on title. It's a matrimonial home.

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            • #7
              You are entitled to half of whatever your husband owns towards the home. You are also entitled to CS (if you have the kids) and likely will get spousal support. Don't let him bully you. Have you spoken to a lawyer?

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              • #8
                No. I have not spoken to a lawyer; He asked that we go to a mediator. I don't have the finances for a lawyer, he has taken what ever we had in the bank accounts out. I have RSP's in my name. He has told me that he can sell the house when ever he feels like it.

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                • #9
                  Well, please don't listen to your husband. It's a bit difficult to help you because most of us are in Ontario and not familiar with BC system.

                  You should contact a women's shelter and ask them to recommend methods for getting legal assistance. Here in Ont, there are offices in every courthouse offering basic help and information on family law on a walk-in basis, so I would hope you have something similar there. You need to get someone to give you some basic information for your own piece of mind, to reduce your stress and anxiety, so that your husband stops bullying you with these claims of his, and so you take the right steps and avoid costly mistakes.

                  Since your husband has a history of violence and drug abuse (steroids is drug abuse) you should strongly consider going to a women's shelter. At the very least they can provide you with basic advice on going through the system.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by bern View Post
                    No. I have not spoken to a lawyer; He asked that we go to a mediator. I don't have the finances for a lawyer, he has taken what ever we had in the bank accounts out. I have RSP's in my name. He has told me that he can sell the house when ever he feels like it.
                    NO, he can't. And if he does, you still are entitled to half of his share of the profit. Do you have legal aid (or something like that in BC). You may qualify. Look into it.

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                    • #11
                      NO. I am not in BC. I was wondering if anyone would know what would be better in my situation legal aid or queen’s law department. I did go down to the local family court house and asked some questions. I was advised not to see a mediator to get a lawyer. I am going to be asking for custody of our kids and to remain in this house, making the kids leave there safe zone feels like a punishment.

                      Thanks Bern

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                      • #12
                        I would look into both options. Does Queens offer help for everyone or just low income? My understanding of the law services provided by schools is that their cases are supervised. They may be able to help you out quite a bit.

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                        • #13
                          It's not been mentioned yet, but make sure you have the documentation on hand for exactly what was in the accounts when he drained them.

                          You are entitled to half. He cannot sell the home until things are done through the courts.

                          Couple things I've learned in my own headache of a custody fight:

                          1. Do NOTHING verbally. Email is your preferable method of contact.

                          2. Lawyer up if you can. See if you can find one whose willing to do a payment plan of some sort. (you may have to scrape together a retainer of some sort.) Legal Aid *might* be able to help.

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                          • #14
                            Hi,
                            I qualified for legal aid this past Wednesday. Queen’s legal aid, I will still call them on the 4th of January. Keeping both options open.

                            My question is how do I know if the lawyer is going to go all out for my kids and myself?
                            What question do I ask the lawyer to see if he/she is good or not?
                            I am also feeling very guilty for doing this with out consulting him.

                            Happy New Year to all,

                            Bern

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                            • #15
                              I was informed by legal aids this morning that I do not qualify due to my RRSP assets but they have asked that I withdraw $2,500 and sign an agreement that a percentage of the settlement goes to legal add.

                              My question is that if I am withdrawing my RRSP funds should I just get a lawyer and try to pay it on my own. Do they do Payment plans?


                              thanks for the help.

                              Comment

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