another summer holiday rant.
My partner and I are a blended family - 3 kids, 4 parents, 2 step parents, a billzillion grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins from Canada and abroad. It takes a spreadsheet to sort the whole summer out. We start with the other parent that's the most difficult, then work with the other other parent, then update the spreadsheet, book camps, book vacations, and share the spreadsheet with family members so they can book events that involve and don't involve the kids on the right days. He has 50/50 and I have all but every second weekend (dad's choice he had more, but gave it up) but we go 50/50 for the summer.
So this year we started in April - got the other parents on board, booked camps, sorted out events and we're all good.
Well one of the other parents isn't happy now. She asked for an early pick up on a day 2 weeks ago (sure no problem, kids miss a day of camp but its for a good reason) then 2 days before she sends a note that demands not the early pick up she asked for the previous week, but a pick up now the evening before (the day following the ask). Which didn't work for us. So it was respectfully declined for the evening pick up (we had plans) and agreed still for the early morning pick up the following day.
We she threw a fit. Sent emails stating he was a "dickhead" etc... Truth is if she had asked for it the week before when she asked for the early pick it would not have been an issue, but we had plans and weren't willing to change them for her lack of planning. (She wanted to kids to pack for the weekend, she knew they were going away when they were with her last (they knew for months they were going away that weekend), but made it his issue that she hadn't gotten them to pack before his week started)
So the fallout from this is that she's now throwing the rest of the agreed to schedule out the window. The entire summer was split with both parents having equal time with the kids, however we had a 2 week chunk of time in the middle of the summer so that we could go to a cottage, and we've booked the other week off to chill out and stay local and do local things.
The "new" schedule she's proposed (because she's been told if she messes with the cottage week she'll have to pay the loss we suffer as a result of not being able to go) is that she'll "allow" the kids to go to the cottage, but he has to give up 2 of his weeks this summer to make that happen. This is blackmail and so so so not in the best interest of the kids. So in a 6 week period, she'll have the kids for 4 weeks, and he'll have 2 (but not the 2 that had been agreed to).
Aside from the cottage we've got plans on weekends without the kids, which we'll now have them and will have to cancel ($500 cancellation fee), change all the camps for August (if we can change - depending on space, and there may be penalties for changing those as well). Plus the PITA of having to do all this last minute when this was all agreed to in APRIL.
ARGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! HOW IS THIS IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE KIDS!??!?!?!?!??!? What's the recourse??
My partner and I are a blended family - 3 kids, 4 parents, 2 step parents, a billzillion grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins from Canada and abroad. It takes a spreadsheet to sort the whole summer out. We start with the other parent that's the most difficult, then work with the other other parent, then update the spreadsheet, book camps, book vacations, and share the spreadsheet with family members so they can book events that involve and don't involve the kids on the right days. He has 50/50 and I have all but every second weekend (dad's choice he had more, but gave it up) but we go 50/50 for the summer.
So this year we started in April - got the other parents on board, booked camps, sorted out events and we're all good.
Well one of the other parents isn't happy now. She asked for an early pick up on a day 2 weeks ago (sure no problem, kids miss a day of camp but its for a good reason) then 2 days before she sends a note that demands not the early pick up she asked for the previous week, but a pick up now the evening before (the day following the ask). Which didn't work for us. So it was respectfully declined for the evening pick up (we had plans) and agreed still for the early morning pick up the following day.
We she threw a fit. Sent emails stating he was a "dickhead" etc... Truth is if she had asked for it the week before when she asked for the early pick it would not have been an issue, but we had plans and weren't willing to change them for her lack of planning. (She wanted to kids to pack for the weekend, she knew they were going away when they were with her last (they knew for months they were going away that weekend), but made it his issue that she hadn't gotten them to pack before his week started)
So the fallout from this is that she's now throwing the rest of the agreed to schedule out the window. The entire summer was split with both parents having equal time with the kids, however we had a 2 week chunk of time in the middle of the summer so that we could go to a cottage, and we've booked the other week off to chill out and stay local and do local things.
The "new" schedule she's proposed (because she's been told if she messes with the cottage week she'll have to pay the loss we suffer as a result of not being able to go) is that she'll "allow" the kids to go to the cottage, but he has to give up 2 of his weeks this summer to make that happen. This is blackmail and so so so not in the best interest of the kids. So in a 6 week period, she'll have the kids for 4 weeks, and he'll have 2 (but not the 2 that had been agreed to).
Aside from the cottage we've got plans on weekends without the kids, which we'll now have them and will have to cancel ($500 cancellation fee), change all the camps for August (if we can change - depending on space, and there may be penalties for changing those as well). Plus the PITA of having to do all this last minute when this was all agreed to in APRIL.
ARGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! HOW IS THIS IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE KIDS!??!?!?!?!??!? What's the recourse??
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