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  • Hello everyone

    New to site and divorce. My wif and I split about 5 months ago. She left the home which we both own. We've been to court and am now paying support. I have yet to see my children because she won't even let me talk to them. She is now trying to have me thrown out of the place and they want to move back in until the property is sold. Everything is about her and my lawyer doesn't seem to want to do anything to stop her and her lawyer. She has told the kids her side and can't tell them my side. I feel hopeless
    Last edited by thisisunreal; 06-13-2013, 01:43 PM. Reason: more info

  • #2
    I wish you had read this forum 5 months ago because if you had, you would have been advised to have your children returned to the marital home via ex-parte motion at the time she took them.

    Do you have a lawyer? What part of the process are you in? You've been to a case conference I assume...anything else?

    She has told the kids her side and can't tell them my side.
    Neither one of you should be "telling the kids your side." The kids should be kept out of your marital dispute as much as possible.

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    • #3
      I didn't mean to say my side. Their mother and family have been filling their heads with garbage and now they hate me and don't want to see me. Motion after motion is driving me nuts. Pissing all the money down the drain. I believe in 50-50 split , but she says she wants to see me living under a bridge. She is in the process of having me removed from the home so she and move back in and be in control again

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      • #4
        wrong entry
        Last edited by thisisunreal; 06-13-2013, 02:27 PM. Reason: entered in wrong place

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        • #5
          Welcome to the forum and I hope that some of the posters here can help you out. Sorry for what you're going through.

          What would be helpful is if you listed what the motions you've had so far have been for and what stage of the process you're in now.

          Also what you've been legally advised so far. Basically, you need to give some basic information in order to get better advice from the posters who have knowledge that can help you.

          For instance, I'm confused because I'm wondering what grounds she's using to kick you out of your own home.

          How old are your children?

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          • #6
            Is there a court order that says you are/are not allowed to see your children?

            Is the house on the market now?

            Does your ex work and make enough to take on the full amount of mortgage/bills? Alternatively, is there a spare room/basement apartment you could move into to allow them to move back into the house so at least you can be with your kids again and demonstrate a 50/50 arrangement until it's sold?

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            • #7
              No there is no court order. I've listed property privately due to the size. She makes about $ 50,000 more than I do. The property is mortgage free. She is the type that would call police to try and screw me over. It's comes down to a control issue. She needs to be in control. If she feels she's not her and her lawyer dream up another motion
              Last edited by thisisunreal; 06-13-2013, 03:25 PM. Reason: more info

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              • #8
                Well, there's no doubt that you'll need to decide how to handle the marital home. A private sale might not be the best option, especially if its been listed for some time and hasn't moved...you may have to actually hire a real estate agent and get it sold.

                That being said, I can't see how she has grounds for exclusive possession unless she moved out based on an abuse situation that she reported. I'd imagine if that was the case though, she'd already in the house. Otherwise, I can't see how she can force you to move out of your own home.

                Unfortunately, the situation with the children is a hard one to solve given that they are older and able to decide on their own where they want to live. Brainwashing kids against a parent generally tends to backfire at some point but in the meantime, do your best to find a way to let your children know that you are there for them whenever they decide to see you or talk to you. Try to send messages to them by email or text once a week or so to let them know that you want to see them and/or talk to them and that you're sorry for the situation.

                Your lawyer should be impressing upon the courts the frivolous motions she's bringing, if that's what she's doing. Your lawyer can discuss the cost, etc. because there's a possibility that they can barr her from bringing more motions.

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                • #9
                  Control freak.

                  Thanks for your input. There where never abuse issues. The property was privately listed due to it being a farm(my business). Sign has been up for 2 days and I ready have people putting names in to bid. She has no idea what's involved in the business or what it's worth(neither does a company that sells homes in town)

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                  • #10
                    PH I think he's saying that he is in the the home ... she left with the kids but wants to move back into the house with the kids and kick him out. Is that correct surreal?

                    How old are your children? Assume this is a working farm of some sort? Do you own any other properties or homes?

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                    • #11
                      control freak

                      yes i'm in the home, Never forced anything and now since i've dug my heels in, it gets ugly. Let the kids come back till it's sold, not her. No i don't have any other property and it is a running family farm.

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                      • #12
                        Are the kids teenagers, possibly manipulated by your ex, and they have decided not to do access with you?

                        Or are they younger and your ex is just refusing to allow them to go?

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                        • #13
                          control Freak

                          The kids are between 13-17 years old. My ex buys them everything they want to keep them in control. 17 year old driving a 45000 dollar SUV to school (HMMMMMMM) What does that tell you

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