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  • It makes no difference

    More than 40% of domestic violence victims are male, report reveals



    More than 40% of domestic violence victims are male, report reveals | Society | The Observer

    Family violence is everybody's problem. Hopefully future legislation will take these statistics seriously.

  • #2
    Intimate Partner Abuse Against Men

    I suspect that the Canadian statistic are lower than what the actual numbers would be in reality - many do not press charges for fear of legal repercussions, ridicule or simply give up because of the system itself being unresponsive to them.

    There is abuse of the system and apathy on either side of the fence. Having gone through it myself all I can say is this: If you are being abused, get help, make noise, document everything and press charges. Be patient, the process is slow and at times you will feel like giving up.

    If more people report these crimes, eventually the laws will change.

    Comment


    • #3
      What I am interested is what are the real stats based on "Serious harm".
      I agree a slap or punch is never acceptable (like NEVER).... but I think the reason police take one seriously or not is because they see women come in black & blue but maybe never see a man?

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Links17 View Post
        What I am interested is what are the real stats based on "Serious harm".
        I agree a slap or punch is never acceptable (like NEVER).... but I think the reason police take one seriously or not is because they see women come in black & blue but maybe never see a man?

        It's up to the individual who has been abused to first get medical help - have it documented and then decide whether to press charges or not. The police will take things seriously if the victim has evidence backed up by a doctor or credible ER staff. (this applies to men/women/children).

        As far as statistics are concerned, I would suspect that many people seeking medical help after a domestic incident don't admit to it out of fear or shame. If the abuse is of a psychological nature it becomes a matter of ''he says she says'' - which is practically impossible to prove.

        Best thing to do is cut your losses, get out of the relationship asap and look into getting some kind of therapy to deal with the aftermath.

        Comment


        • #5
          This article has corroborating references and statistics regarding violence and includes violence against men:

          The Facts About Violence Against Women | Canadianwomen.org


          http://www.statcan.gc.ca/daily-quoti...30225a-eng.htm
          Last edited by arabian; 01-19-2014, 11:03 AM.

          Comment


          • #6
            Thanks Arabian for ^^^ post. I'm sure it will be very useful to those seeking help or in depth statistics

            Comment


            • #7
              what are your thoughts on abused women punished by the court for coming forward with their abuse during custody battles?

              Comment


              • #8
                Courts might not have accepted the evidence of abuse. People cry "abuse" frequently thinking it will give them an edge in custody. Bringing false accusations against someone is, indeed, an offence that may be punished severely.

                Comment


                • #9
                  lately i found lots of real abused women pay for the other women who made false accusations of abuse. i agree that those women should even be sent to jail for their lies but would n't be fair for a truly abused woman with no choice to get justice at the end. the legal system should be specialized in this matter so no victim will be victimized again. a smart judge will make the difference unless they are too busy rushing over their cases to finish their day.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by health View Post
                    lately i found lots of real abused women pay for the other women who made false accusations of abuse. i agree that those women should even be sent to jail for their lies but would n't be fair for a truly abused woman with no choice to get justice at the end. the legal system should be specialized in this matter so no victim will be victimized again. a smart judge will make the difference unless they are too busy rushing over their cases to finish their day.
                    Unfortunately, this is impossible if you penalize women for making false accusations - you'll reduce the incentive to make the "real" accusations and unless it is EXTREMELY flagrant the system would prefer not to discourage abused women from coming forward by penalizing liars.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...ase-law-16809/

                      In order to understand whether domestic violence exists within a family it’s [sic] definition and effect must be stated clearly and comprehensively. Unfortunately the words “domestic violence” do and have defined a number of behaviours including isolated or rare incidents in a relationship – a push, a shove, rudeness, disrespect, and name calling all of which are unpleasant to those on the receiving end of these behaviours but which should not necessarily be accepted as an indication that the relationship requires judicial intervention. If these behaviours have no pattern of repetition and leave little if any lasting impact upon the recipient they need not be monitored with the same vigilance as will be the case when coercive control is involved. Counselling programs for persons who are “unpleasant” towards others may be quite different from those designed for persons who resort to abuse as a mechanism of coercive control.
                      Good Luck!
                      Tayken

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        what defines a coercive control?

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          As I understand it, coercive control is when you use violence or abuse as a way of forcing the other person to do (or not do) something. For instance, someone who beats their spouse for divulging marriage difficulties to a friend may be using violence as a way of forcing the spouse to remain quiet and not talk about problems. Someone who uses threats of violence to get sex is also exerting coercion and control. This is different from "explosive" violence, which occurs because the perpetrator is unable or unwilling to regulate his/her emotional outbursts and acts out feelings of anger or hostility through violence. Both kinds of behavior can co-exist in the same person.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Links17 View Post
                            Unfortunately, this is impossible if you penalize women for making false accusations - you'll reduce the incentive to make the "real" accusations and unless it is EXTREMELY flagrant the system would prefer not to discourage abused women from coming forward by penalizing liars.
                            ^^^ Very true, many spouses endure years of abuse simply for fear of not being taken seriously (men/women). As I wrote earlier police are hesitant to pursue the issue unless there are obvious signs of violence - often times victims will press charges and later drop them for various reasons. It takes a victim several attempts to muster the courage to finally get out ...

                            The risk of false allegations being made in order to gain custody or exclusive possession of the MH happens more than we know and I truly sympathize with anyone falsely accused.

                            Having said that, if there is a history of well documented problems - not just a one-time loss of self-control, chances are it's real.

                            Comment

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