Divorce - why me? why us? What the hell could I have done to avoid this complicated mess? It's over, so why can't I get over it? I ask myself these questions in the wee hours of the night with my only company being the mounting stack of bills and this awful sense of injustice .....
According to the so-called experts, it takes one year for every five years of marriage, to get over the divorce. Not good!
Life isn't supposed to be easy, it's about struggling and hard work and learning how to adapt to difficult situations. We are sent here to learn a lesson - challenges that would improve our eternal souls. Or is it something we did that angered the being upstairs (God) and now we are stuck here in Hell until we've figured it out? it would explain why there is so much injustice on Earth no?
Whatever the case may be, divorce happens for a reason - it's up to each person to accept the lesson, learn from it and move on. It doesn't matter how evil-corrupt-unfair or crazy we may perceive the Ex to be, each spouse contributed in some way to the demise of the marriage ... Same could be said for marriages that DO work, it can't be accomplished with only one spouse making 100% of the sacrifices.
The moment a person stops participating in the "blame-game" is when real progress can be made, otherwise expect to be in and out of court for a very very long time. Remember, lawyers profit from our bitterness and our children pay the price.
I forgive the TWERP and myself - no, I will not be wasting 5-6 years to get over it .... And how do you handle this Victory Garden of emotions? I've tried therapy and all that, didn't help very much. Only thing that works for me is patience, prayer and time.
Jan
According to the so-called experts, it takes one year for every five years of marriage, to get over the divorce. Not good!
Life isn't supposed to be easy, it's about struggling and hard work and learning how to adapt to difficult situations. We are sent here to learn a lesson - challenges that would improve our eternal souls. Or is it something we did that angered the being upstairs (God) and now we are stuck here in Hell until we've figured it out? it would explain why there is so much injustice on Earth no?
Whatever the case may be, divorce happens for a reason - it's up to each person to accept the lesson, learn from it and move on. It doesn't matter how evil-corrupt-unfair or crazy we may perceive the Ex to be, each spouse contributed in some way to the demise of the marriage ... Same could be said for marriages that DO work, it can't be accomplished with only one spouse making 100% of the sacrifices.
The moment a person stops participating in the "blame-game" is when real progress can be made, otherwise expect to be in and out of court for a very very long time. Remember, lawyers profit from our bitterness and our children pay the price.
I forgive the TWERP and myself - no, I will not be wasting 5-6 years to get over it .... And how do you handle this Victory Garden of emotions? I've tried therapy and all that, didn't help very much. Only thing that works for me is patience, prayer and time.
Jan
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