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  • Scared of The Unknown...

    While awaiting some kind of interim support since March, my child and I are sharing a bed in a monthly 1 bedroom "corporate" stay apt. Sparseley furnished yet rent is eating up what little savings I have left.

    I've been looking for a better place and cheaper one than 2500.00 a month but since I've been a"homemaker" for 15 years, and, the fact im a wreck (just have been prescribed by dr. mild tranquilizers for accute anxiety attacks) finding a job or even looking for one to provide us w/ more funds is next to impossible. Would I even be able to function at a job is another story.

    Ive been searching for people in like situations or that live on their own and have thought about renting out perhaps their basement apts? or even some of their rooms to help with their own costs.

    I've looked around here for a posting like this but did not see any....wonder if there are any people that have considered this or know of any in my city....PM me since I want to keep my presence here anonymous.

    Thanks for anyones help in my nightmare..or personal jail I've found myself in!

  • #2
    Contact your local women's shelter. They are the experts in helping women and children. You don't need to be a battered woman to make use of their services. I was not beaten, but I was similar to yourself (married 20+ years, no job, 4 children and suddenly on my own) and they know all the resources that are available for you. They can get you onto waiting lists for co-op housing, and have the ability to move you up the waiting list since your housing situation is urgent. They know what direction to steer you for possible job training, etc. I cannot speak highly enough about the help I received from my local women's shelter! Give yours a call.

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    • #3
      thank you, i will try that. dont know though if driving to an appt. there in "his" mercedes benz will appear odd, I know it will make me feel very self-conscious.

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      • #4
        WHY are you paying $2500 a month for rent? That is ridiculous!

        Where do you live? I'm sure you can find a decent place for HALF that!

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        • #5
          No job and no work history, she probably would have trouble with landlords renting to her, especially large corporate places. She is essentially staying in a hotel. She could find a cheaper one, but in a decent neighbourhood close to schools? I agree she could do better, but I understand how she got where she is.

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          • #6
            In that case, I see the problem too. A women's shelter will probably be able to help best.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by scaredntired View Post
              thank you, i will try that. dont know though if driving to an appt. there in "his" mercedes benz will appear odd, I know it will make me feel very self-conscious.
              Nope. Don't let that phase you at all... you'd be amazed at what they've seen. You are a woman in need. They are not there to judge.

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              • #8
                You should definitely check out the women's shelter, but be prepared to accept having to take an apartment that is not Mercedes like i.e. $1,200/mth.

                Is your ex still in the home? Is there a reason why the child isn't at home? On the face of it, the home would seem to be a better place until you sort out your living arrangements.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Mess View Post
                  No job and no work history, she probably would have trouble with landlords renting to her, especially large corporate places. She is essentially staying in a hotel. She could find a cheaper one, but in a decent neighbourhood close to schools? I agree she could do better, but I understand how she got where she is.
                  That's exactly what Ive run into. Coupled with the already low vacancy rate. I only came here and had expected to stay only a week or so until I was able to find a more stable place. It was in essence a midnight move. Of course that was 4.5 months ago and alot of legal maneuvring has occurred by my ex and his band of lawyers which has resulted in no support and living off of savings.....

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by dadtotheend View Post
                    You should definitely check out the women's shelter, but be prepared to accept having to take an apartment that is not Mercedes like i.e. $1,200/mth.

                    Is your ex still in the home? Is there a reason why the child isn't at home? On the face of it, the home would seem to be a better place until you sort out your living arrangements.
                    ex owns home and everything else.....child is mine

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                    • #11
                      You mean that your ex is not the father?

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                      • #12
                        Definitely agree about contacting a shelter - also, check what assistance programs are available in your city. Ottawa has a slew of programs including emergency funding for women in need.

                        In the meantime, find a one bedroom in someone's basement or wherever. If you have the money for first and last, you'll get the apt.

                        I am so sorry that you are in this situation and that your ex is ok with his child living like this. It's not right and I have a few choice words for someone so callous...

                        Stay strong - this too will pass.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by scaredntired View Post
                          ex owns home and everything else.....child is mine
                          "the child is mine" Where is the father? Have you asked or gone after or receiving CS from him?

                          $2500/ month, I'm totally not understanding that one, I think that was already asked, but where are you living Downtown TO?

                          Maybe find another location, heck there should be no reason why you can't find something for half that amount or even less, pending your location.

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                          • #14
                            I would think after 15 years as a "Homemaker" you would be entitled to Spousal Support. Additionally, I presume you were common law - unjust enrichment.

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                            • #15
                              Possibly CS too. How can you afford $2500 a month for rent? Like someone said apply for co op housing and in meantime find a basement or something way cheaper. Kijiji.ca is one of the places where people look for and advertise rental properties.

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