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  • Child Support/custody and Moved in..

    Hi,
    Long story short my 16 year old son has moved in with me. I am the Payor of CS to the Mother....my daughter still lives with her. Am I to just continue to pay her the full monthly amount or does it change with circumstance. Also, she is using FRO and comes directly off my pay. Thoughts?!? Ideas?!?

    Is there a waiting period for this? She has told the kids 6 months before I would get any money back. Should I expect her to offer some of the CS to me now.

    I went through (still in) bankruptcy and live off $1600 a month...Rent is $720 plus hydro ....now son here full-time. My standard of living is far below hers.

  • #2
    You file right away.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by turboty View Post
      Hi,
      Long story short my 16 year old son has moved in with me. I am the Payor of CS to the Mother....my daughter still lives with her. Am I to just continue to pay her the full monthly amount or does it change with circumstance. Also, she is using FRO and comes directly off my pay. Thoughts?!? Ideas?!?

      Is there a waiting period for this? She has told the kids 6 months before I would get any money back. Should I expect her to offer some of the CS to me now.

      I went through (still in) bankruptcy and live off $1600 a month...Rent is $720 plus hydro ....now son here full-time. My standard of living is far below hers.
      In bc here I asked the family maintenance enforcement agency about that kind of a situation, they told me to let them know if there is any court action to do with the child support they are enforcing, they can access the records of any orders or pending applications and may suspend support payments. In my situation I am the reciever of payments.

      You should file a motion with your court file number to change that it is definetly a change, talk to your fro case manager about the situation.

      Comment


      • #4
        How long ago did your son move in with you? If it was only a month or two, I would hold off seeking any change in CS because the situation could be transitory (could go back to Mom), especially with teenagers who are notoriously back-and-forth). Where I live, the unofficial rule seems to be that if a change in residence lasts for six months, it's considered permanent and it's appropriate to change the CS arrangements.

        You also don't want it to look like you are encouraging Kid to move in with you in order to reduce your payments - important to show that Kid is living with you for other reasons. If you wait a few months and don't hurry to file for a change, it's clear that you aren't bringing Kid to live with you for financial reasons.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by stripes View Post
          You also don't want it to look like you are encouraging Kid to move in with you in order to reduce your payments - important to show that Kid is living with you for other reasons. If you wait a few months and don't hurry to file for a change, it's clear that you aren't bringing Kid to live with you for financial reasons.
          Why does it matter if you are getting kid to live with you for financial reasons? Offhand, I believe that most people who fight for more than 60% custody are doing it almost entirely for the money. If you are getting all the kids, then you can flat out bribe them and there is nothing wrong with that.

          This is a case of split custody, not shared. I think the case law is pretty settled for split custody. This is where offset for one kid happens. No need to prove some moral high ground. So, some caution maybe because judges don't always follow the law, but not too much. I would get mom to sign forms to change CS pronto, and if she doesn't I would motion immediately. By the time the motion is heard the six months will have passed, and any money that is paid before you start the motion you won't be recovering.

          Comment


          • #6
            Because its with FRO i would err on the side of updating. Or at least withdrawing since mom will need to pay dad. By having it come off his paycheque its not fair since he is incurring costs by having the kid there. As long as they agree a set amount of CS monthly and it will be paid, it can be worked out together. Even if kid goes back to mom, cs will be adjusted accordingly.

            Comment


            • #7
              I'd change the CS right away to the proper offset system for having one kid at each house. This is a 16-year-old boy we're talking about. That's a LOT of food to pay for when the money is still going to the other house.

              Comment


              • #8
                still think it's relevant how long the kid has been living at Dad's house - if it's been a week or two, the situation could easily flip-flop and he could be back and Mom's, or moving between the two houses. This is a teenager we're talking about after all. If the kid has been there for months, it's more likely a permanent change.

                Also not clear - whether the son used to do 50/50 and is now 100% living with Dad, or whether he used to be 100% with Mom and is now 100% with Dad. This makes a big different in terms of CS.

                Comment


                • #9
                  I would start the process now to change the CS... if it is deducted off the OP's cheque, they are going to need a new court order... Mom obviously isn't agreeing to this change so he would need court. At 16 the kid can decide where to live, so I don't think the whole waiting period is necessary because if he says he wants to live with Dad full time, a Judge won't rule otherwise. The process will take some time, so start it now and by the time the end comes, it will be a longer time frame.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    ^^^^ Good point which I missed - if CS is being collected by a third party agency like FRO, by the time any changes get made, enough time will have passed that it will be clear whether Kid is staying permanently at Dad's or not. For some reason I was thinking the OP was paying CS directly to Mom.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      There is rule that says once child support is paid it is never clawed back. Not sure if it applies here as the logic is that the custodial parent is assumed to have "spent" the money.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Thanks for the info and advice...it has only been a couple of weeks and mom is in no way going to sign anything I give her. I will call FRO case manager and let her know. FRO will NOT waiver from any court order...even though in the court order it stated that they are to adjust accordingly...They can't do that because there is a number value on the order.....
                        Will check in with FLIC and see what forms I need and go about a motion to change CS. It would be nice if she would talk to me and work with me however she has chosen her path. Thanks again for advice.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          FRO may keep collecting from you, but may not pay it out to Mom if you tell them you are going to court over it. I have heard of this happening, that way they don't have to claw it back. If you dispute, Mom may have to prove to FRO that she is still entitled. Good luck!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Getting used.......

                            Quick update with case: I spoke with FRO case manager and she confirms that if mom sends a letter acknowledging son is living with me full-time they will adjust the amount based on the court order for my daughter.
                            Mom has been informed and will not do or sign anything and has now threatened to go after me for even more claiming I have not provided her for the past 3 years my Notice of Assessment. She never once in that time asked for them, and we would have to go to court to change the order as it had listed a yearly income for me.
                            She is also claiming that she hasn't submitted section 7 expenses, I asked what since neither child is in anything or in daycare as they are 14 and 16 yrs old. I tried to explain that we would have to go to court to change the CS, and I just have to assume that the last 3 yrs she had been comfortable and satisfied with the order. She now wants to get retroactive CS. I don't understand where she is coming from. Section 7 expenses should have been given to me at the time they were being used, not months or years later considering what they are?!?

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Does your agreement state you have to agree in advance to s7 expenses?

                              Also, you are obligated to advise when your income changes regardless of what your agreement states. You could calculate what you owe and agree to no cs until that amount runs out.

                              Unless she withdraws from FRO you will need a new order to change it.

                              Comment

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