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  • Medical Benefits

    So case conference last week...and on consent I now have sole custody, primary residency and full-table CS since my ex no longer sees or contacts our kid. However, I went to fill a prescription for her this weekend and found out that he's dropped her off all medical benefits which is covered in our SA. So of course, I had to pay the full cost for the medication she needed.

    I'm going to ask my lawyer to send a letter telling him to reinstate benefits and provide me with proof or I'm filing a motion and asking for full costs but is there something else I should/could do? I'm so irritated right now because I was just in court last week.

    It just never ends.

  • #2
    Originally posted by Pursuinghappiness View Post
    So case conference last week...and on consent I now have sole custody, primary residency and full-table CS since my ex no longer sees or contacts our kid. However, I went to fill a prescription for her this weekend and found out that he's dropped her off all medical benefits which is covered in our SA. So of course, I had to pay the full cost for the medication she needed.

    I'm going to ask my lawyer to send a letter telling him to reinstate benefits and provide me with proof or I'm filing a motion and asking for full costs but is there something else I should/could do? I'm so irritated right now because I was just in court last week.

    It just never ends.
    Not sure how much credit is given to the SA but if there is a court order that he's to keep valid insurance benefits for child then he's in contempt. You could file a motion to find him in contempt.

    If he's to contribute to medical expenses then just send him the reciept. if he doesn't reimbirse you file the motion and seek those medical expenses and legal costs. I would send him the reciept and ask for a reimbursement regardless.

    Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk
    Last edited by trinton; 04-16-2017, 07:51 PM.

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    • #3
      Originally posted by trinton View Post
      Not sure how much credit is given to the SA but if there is a court order that he's to keep valid insurance benefits for child then he's in contempt. You could file a motion to find him in contempt.

      If he's to contribute to medical expenses then just send him the reciept. if he doesn't reimbirse you file the motion and seek those medical expenses and legal costs. I would send him the reciept and ask for a reimbursement regardless.

      Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk
      The terms of my SA is a signed court order and clearly specifies that my ex is to provide medical benefits to our daughter.

      I won't be sending any bills because he'd just ignore it...we don't communicate at all.

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      • #4
        Send the letter. Its clear in your agreement and he has a history of a-hole behaviour. You know he cancelled her benefits after agreeing to custody. Hes high conflict and wants to punish his kid.

        If he would only pull his head out of his ass he wouldnt have an issue!!

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Pursuinghappiness View Post
          The terms of my SA is a signed court order and clearly specifies that my ex is to provide medical benefits to our daughter.

          I won't be sending any bills because he'd just ignore it...we don't communicate at all.
          Then he's likely in contempt.

          The no communication part is problematic as there could have been changes to his benefits (provider changed, etc) that he's not communicating with you.

          You could just pull the trigger and file your contempt motion hoping he's done something intentional but I think it always looks good on you to try to be civil.

          You could contact him directly. Don't worry about him ignoring your communications or blasting you with something rude. That's what you want, it would likely only help you in your motion.

          If you guys don't communicate for good reason then probably best to have your lawyer send out with prejudice fax/mail/email with the bill to show the incurred expense and see what's going on with the benefits, threatening and moving forward with a contempt motion as necessary.


          Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk
          Last edited by trinton; 04-16-2017, 11:17 PM.

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          • #6
            Thanks everyone. I've asked my lawyer to send a letter but I'll probably have to file yet another motion.

            Its irritating because I was in court just last week. And after I got out of the drug store I was so ticked that I just dropped almost $200 bucks...after being told by the pharmacist that she had been removed from benefits...that when I closed the car door, I was venting and my daughter started to tear up. She already feels abandoned by her dad and the last thing she needs is me having a lack of self-control over my anger.

            I apologized profusely but I still feel like a jackhole.

            The good news is that I just read an article about how people like him often die early and alone....so there's that little ray of sunshine.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Pursuinghappiness View Post
              The good news is that I just read an article about how people like him often die early and alone....so there's that little ray of sunshine.
              That may not be as sunny as you make it seem to be unless he's court ordered to carry life insurance on child support and medical benefits for life, otherwise, it will be a very dark tunnel.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by trinton View Post
                That may not be as sunny as you make it seem to be unless he's court ordered to carry life insurance on child support and medical benefits for life, otherwise, it will be a very dark tunnel.
                Yes, that is in our order...although you can see how well he follows court orders.

                But if he croaks, I'm fine with assuming the full responsibility of financially taking care of our kid(s). Its pretty much what I do now anyway.

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                • #9
                  I don't have them offhand, but I have read many cases where a parent has dropped a kid from benefits, and the judge generally orders that the impetuous parent is then 100% responsible for the consequent increase in health related expenses.

                  It obviously sucks to have to motion right after just being in court, but if you whack somebody's pocket book enough it will eventually get them to do the right thing.

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                  • #10
                    Amusing Update

                    So I thought I'd provide an update to the latest stupidity since its funny.

                    So my lawyer sent a letter over to the ex's lawyer essentially warning him that he better re-instate our kid back on his medical benefits per our SA. His lawyer then responds that she IS on his benefits, however, the company he works for is investigating me for insurance fraud because he's pretty certain that I'm using her name to obtain un-prescribed medication.

                    The un-prescribed medication that I'm apparently committing this fraud for...

                    wait for it...

                    Birth control pills!

                    So here's the story. In my family, women have severe iron issues. My daughter was having issues with feeling faint, nauseous, sleepy/low energy and started developing rashes. So I took her to the doctor and the doctor prescribed the same pills I use to limit menstrual cycles so that she's depleting less iron. So we're on the same prescription...which is the only medication either one of us takes. When this initially happened, I told her to explain this to her dad at the time but she refused because she knew he'd fly into a rage without listening to the reason the pills were prescribed. And because I knew she was right...I told her that it was up to her whether to tell him or not.

                    So his brilliant conclusion was that I was illegally using her name to get bc pills...despite the fact that I make more money than he does and have my own benefits package from my employer. Makes sense right?

                    Sooo...I had my lawyer send over copies of both prescriptions and explain to him that his reasoning is bull because you can't just cut her off of one prescription...and that he needs to re-add her to benefits.

                    And he responded that he doesn't believe my explanation (and apparently, I know how to create pharmacy receipts in my home office for fake scripts). To him, it apparently makes sense that I need two prescriptions for the same bc pills...you know, in case I get knocked up with twins right? I mean everyone knows that there's a lot of bc pill junkies out there running wild.

                    Anyway, my awesome husband and I finally decided that its not worth the legal bills to pursue and too risky for my daughter not to be covered...so we're adding her to his government medical benefits once she starts school.

                    I'm just still shaking my damn head at the nonsense I have to deal with because of this idiot. I truly hope his benefits company calls me up or sends me a letter due to this supposed fraud investigation I'm under so I can send them a flaming response. More likely, he's just lying and cut her off because he's a cheap tool.

                    The only plus side was that my lawyer and I laughed about it for 30 minutes which was pretty fun...just sucks that I have to pay for the stupid letter.

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                    • #11
                      hilarious

                      What an idiot! Hope he's spending megabucks on his lawyer to pursue this.

                      Of course a simple note from the doctor and pharmacist would shut them down in a nanosecond.

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                      • #12
                        OK, well he's grasping to cause problems.

                        Why did you have to pay for her prescription if she's on your benefits too?

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                        • #13
                          You could also ask for proof from the insurance company that shes still on his benefits (its a simple screen capture) and a statement from the company that they are investigating. I have a feeling hes making this investigation up.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by paris View Post
                            OK, well he's grasping to cause problems.

                            Why did you have to pay for her prescription if she's on your benefits too?
                            Who's got the earlier birthday here? If you have benefits as well then the person with the earlier birthday has to claim the expenses first.

                            Does child have documented (lab test results) showing iron deficiency ?If so, you could use that to justify birth control pills for iron deficiency.

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                            • #15
                              Most insurance companies have changed the "first birthday" rule. For separated divorced couples, it goes parent with residential first, spouse of residential parent second, non residential parent third, spouse of no residential last. If you have joint physical custody (ie kids go back and forth 50/50) then its birthdays. This is how my benefits company, my partners benefits and his exs benefits work and they are three of the big ones.

                              You may want to check with your benefits company regarding their policy on "coordination of benefits".

                              Comment

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