Too quiet in here

[Wanderer]

It feels like forever since I was waking up to a house full of good craziness.
Now I wake up and im completely alone. It leaves me with too much time to think.
I feel impending doom the minute I walk into my kitchen and realize that this day may be the day I have no choice but to realize I may never see, hear and feel my adopted children.
I want to punish myself by pondering on regretting ever allowing all three of them into my heart but than I stop feeling angry for a minute and force myself to remember how good I felt. All that love and good memories is what keeps me alive.
One day I hope I can drink my coffee without tears in it.

[standing on the sidelines]

I am not sure how old the kids are but never give up. When they are older they may seek you out and re-connect.

[LovingFather32]

Well first of all thank you for starting my day off with tears. Lol It makes me sad because i know exactly how you feel.
Going to bed without reading books, cuddles, etc....waking up to nothing but the sound of your heart beat ..beating way too loud.

Feb 15th/2014...the day I realized just how cruel this world can be. It changed me forever.

Always hold on to hope and never give up. The sun will shine again.

[Links17]

They say "kids are resilient" but they go through much worse. Time heals.

[SadAndTired]

Hugs to you.

[Janibel]

Aww, I understand how you feel - things where not supposed to happen this way. Empty-nest feelings are quite normal and made worse by this being so sudden. It's the risk that all step-parents face ... not easy at all.

Give yourself plenty of time to grieve. ((HUGS))

[Wanderer]

Thanks everyone. Hugs to you too.

[Mike62]

Here's a big warm hug.

[Wanderer]

Thanks Mike62[emoji4]


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[Mike62]

Wow. Your timing is great. Your happy face icon arrived at a low point. So thanks for the pick-me-up.