This is so hard! I am trying to embrace all the wonders of being alone for the first time in forever, trying to revel in eating only melba toast and artichoke dip for supper if I want...all that stuff.... I just feel so lost. I have a completely uninspiring job, so I get no personal satisfaction there (at least it's not soul-destroying like my previous career was). I have read every book I can stand to read (for now), I'm sick of going for walks, I don't want to go shopping...
My ex appears to be loving the single-and-alone life. He has the marital house and so he is in familiar territory, whereas I'm not, but I don't know if that is the secret to his contentment or not. Of course, he has said that he was a lifelong bachelor who's plans were spoiled by ME, so I suppose he's just living his dream now .
It just seems like everywhere I look, everyone has a life. Well I guess I have a life too but I feel like I'm rotting away. I really thought that, once everything was settled and I was single, I would open up into this beautiful butterfly kind of a thing.... no so! And, to be clear, it's not a new relationship that I want (definitely not - friends would be okay), except maybe with myself.. How on earth do I go about learning to live with myself and for myself!? Something tells me that I am in a good position - 40, educated, no kids (I guess that's good... only myself to look after, anyway), financially "okay", absolutely free to do anything I want - why cant' I make this work?
Thanks everyone. I feel like such a burden here. I've searched the net for other possible forums where maybe my "whining" might fit in better, but I keep coming back here. There is something about all the personalities here that makes me feel, well, NOT alone.
My ex appears to be loving the single-and-alone life. He has the marital house and so he is in familiar territory, whereas I'm not, but I don't know if that is the secret to his contentment or not. Of course, he has said that he was a lifelong bachelor who's plans were spoiled by ME, so I suppose he's just living his dream now .
It just seems like everywhere I look, everyone has a life. Well I guess I have a life too but I feel like I'm rotting away. I really thought that, once everything was settled and I was single, I would open up into this beautiful butterfly kind of a thing.... no so! And, to be clear, it's not a new relationship that I want (definitely not - friends would be okay), except maybe with myself.. How on earth do I go about learning to live with myself and for myself!? Something tells me that I am in a good position - 40, educated, no kids (I guess that's good... only myself to look after, anyway), financially "okay", absolutely free to do anything I want - why cant' I make this work?
Thanks everyone. I feel like such a burden here. I've searched the net for other possible forums where maybe my "whining" might fit in better, but I keep coming back here. There is something about all the personalities here that makes me feel, well, NOT alone.
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