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  • mediation

    My ex is finally seeing the light and is agreeing to look in to mediation. His lawyer is telling him that if he files a claim against me the court will order mediation (since neither of us will be represented) and it will be free.

    I've been told we will have to pay.

    Anyone know the correct answer here?

  • #2
    I opted for mediation about a year ago in order to get some access to my kids as my ex just moved out of the house one day while I was at work.
    I did not want to start down the road with the court due to horror stories I had heard.
    In any case, we agreed to a local mediator that was recomended by the FLIC (Family Law Information Center) in our local courthouse.
    It cost us (me) $200 per hour for the mediation.
    I have since suggested to go back to mediation in order to finish up our separation agreement, but I have requested that the mediation be timed per "issue". That is to say we will spend 4 hours talking about spousal support, as an example. Then if we can't agree the mediator becomes an arbitrator whose decision is final and binding on us.
    I have proposed this because the other party does not really understand the process of bargining or mediating and since I am the one that is paying for it, I would like some resolution.

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    • #3
      Wow. That's a fantastic idea. Do they actually do that?

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      • #4
        Sure.
        It is much less expensive than going to court.
        I would suggest that you utilize the services of a lawyer in preparing for the mediation.
        They can give you guidance on what and how to prepare any "evidence" and other documentation.
        They might help you prepare an "agenda" in order to focus your time and efforts towards your goals.
        You will also want to get independent advice as to what actually goes into the agreement.
        Generally the mediator will charge a little more per hour for the "arbitration" portion of the job. However, if you were to spend 10 hours mediating 5 topics (2 hours each), that would be about $2,000. Maybe another 5 hours at $250 per hour for the arbitration ($1,000)
        Maybe another 10 hours with your lawyer ($2000?) So for $1500 (half of the $3000) plus another $2000 you could have a separation agreement in place and not have to see the inside of a court. Not only could you save money and time, but you and your ex have worked together on an agreement and not relied on others.
        Hopefully it would be a "win/win" situation.

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