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My partner's ex-wife wants my money honey!

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  • My partner's ex-wife wants my money honey!

    Hi there, I (female) seem to be the target of my new partner's (male) ex-wife. She wants copies of my financials, here are some facts that I think you might need to give me some words of wisdom...
    • We live in Ontario
    • I have lived with my new boyfriend since May 2015
    • He has a full time job
    • They have had 2 case conferences already
    • They have a final court order dated 7 months ago
    • Child support, section 7 expenses and spousal were determined in final order
    • My new partner pays his support on time, nothing outstanding
    • Ex wife wants to re-open final order for various odd reasons and in the case conference paperwork she is requesting my financials


    Question 1
    If my partner and I have lived together since May of 2015 are we considered common law? I've heard that it's 1 year living together and I've heard it's 3 years living together... this answer would be good to have as she is referring to me as his "common law" partner.

    Question 2
    Am I obligated to supply my financials just because she has asked for them? Or should I leave out my financials and let the judge request them if he see's fit.

  • #2
    Unless your partner is claiming hardship, your financials are not required.

    If he has a lawyer, they can properly word the "get bent" response to this request.

    Again, your financials are not required if your bf is not claiming hardship. Period. The end.

    Comment


    • #3
      As far as I know, there's no reason for her to have your financial information unless there is an issue with child support such that either your boyfriend or his ex-wife are claiming that "undue hardship" is preventing them from fulfilling their child support obligations, in which case the finances of other household members become relevant.

      So depending on what the "various odd reasons" are, you might be required to provide your financial information, but most likely not. Don't just hand it over unless your boyfriend's ex's lawyer provides a reason (which your boyfriend's lawyer vets).

      As for common-law status, see here:

      Living with a partner: know your rights and responsibilities – National Association of Women and the Law

      Comment


      • #4
        Thank you rockscan and stripes...

        it's extremely frustrating and frightening to have a woman in 2017 asking to see another woman's financials. I have two boys of my own that I support and she knows this, which makes her request for documentation even more absurd. She has more formal education than I do, she lives with her parents without household expenses and yet she comes to me for possible assistance. There is no "undue hardship" mentioned in her case conference brief... she's just looking for more money to stay home and not work... it's disgusting.

        Comment


        • #5
          If your bf is making his support payments and has no issues with increasing it when his income increases then there is no issue.

          Shes probably trying to get under your skin. Dont let her. Your household income has no impact on her unless your bf cries broke and cant pay support.

          Learn to let a lot of what is said go. Otherwise you will make yourself crazy. You are now public enemy number one in his divorce. Ignore ignore ignore.

          Comment


          • #6
            You're right rockscan... ignore. thats the exact advice I would give someone in my position. Thanks for the reminder.

            Comment


            • #7
              "it's extremely frustrating and frightening to have a woman in 2017 asking to see another woman's financials.... it's disgusting."


              Yeah, we men wouldn't know anything about that. ��

              Comment


              • #8
                Hi piggybanktoex... I hear ya! I know that men traditionally end up with the sh!tty end of the stick with regards to finances, child access and generally having to defend and fight for their rights. Some ex's are deadbeats and need to be dealt with, however, the majority are just trying to do the best for their children and themselves. Provided that there are no extreme circumstances I'm frustrated that fully capable women are "gold digging" rather than doing what it takes to make a new life for themselves. That's what I meant by "disgusting" above. I am standing by my bf who is currently going through one disaster of a divorce, and I'm assuming by your handle, you've had your challenges as well.

                This thread is related to the scenario that (hypothetically speaking) you are living with another woman and your ex wife is coming after her finances now because she is not satisfied with what you already give her. Or, on the flipside... (hypothetically speaking) your ex wife is living with another man and he comes after your income to support his kids.

                I just wanted to know if she was legally able to ask for my financials... that's all this thread is about.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Offhand, I would try and provoke the ex into launching a motion to get your financials. Tell her rudely in person that she is a moron for thinking that she has any chance of seeing your financials, and that you actually make about 600k a year.

                  When she loses the motion, you get to hit her for costs, and that goes a long way towards shortening frivolous litigation.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Question 1
                    If my partner and I have lived together since May of 2015 are we considered common law?
                    Filing for taxes - 1 year
                    Claiming spousal support - 3 years (or having a child together, and living together in relationship of permanence)

                    Question 2
                    Am I obligated to supply my financials just because she has asked for them?
                    No. Your partner's response to her request can be, "I do not have access to my girlfriend's finances. She doesn't want to provide them and won't give them to me for this litigation". If his ex wants to see your documentation she would then need to serve you with a motion to disclose them.

                    Comment

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