Long time lurker, first time poster.
Background: Ex and I have 50/50 joint custody of D4 with a judge-signed custody agreement. D4 has been attending the same daycare/preschool since turning 1. Shortly after split, Ex moved less than 2km away from my home. Both Ex and I work 3 km away from the neighbourhood.
Last year, Ex moved without notice to suburb, 24 km away from my home, in a different municipal district than is in the custody agreement for D4's agreed residence. I had no complaints at the time as the preschool and transition arrangements were not changing, thus D4 still would mostly be in her habitual residence. Ex still works in the same location near the current daycare.
Ex now insists that preschool be changed to a preschool near their new residence. Ex also strongly suggests school should be there too.
Ex also says that if we don't agree, they will just split to the new preschool for their parenting time while I retain the old preschool, which not only would be a disruption to D4's routine (two daycares) but would increase our costs by $500 monthly each. Once Ex claimed they would do this unilaterally, I involved my lawyer.
I am getting inconsistent reasons justifying this proposed change to the status quo. Originally it was due to the daycare facility being "older", and that the teachers at the current daycare were in many cases "ESL" (not kidding) where Ex would prefer native English speakers. Now, after a couple months of back and forth, the Ex is claiming the current preschool is negligent and D4 is being emotionally and/or physically harmed by attending. There is no such evidence to my knowledge. Daycare has notified us about the odd shoving match when arguing over a toy, or tantrums during class transitions. Ex is trying to turn these relatively minor incidents into a case against the preschool. Ex has been combative with the daycare administrators over this subject, even threatening legal action if they tried to provide counselling or evaluation services for D4.
Lawyers have now exchanged two letters over the disagreement, and Ex's lawyer is insisting on mediation "immediately", "or else" they will unilaterally move to new preschool on Ex's parenting time.
I'm not sure what is there to mediate: this feels like an ultimatum in the guise of "you're not communicating". We are communicating, Ex just doesn't seem to like the message, or that I insist on email communication and not face-to-face.
Thoughts? Is this a losing battle because it is on Ex's time (subject to Section 7 adjustments)? Or if Ex unilaterally moves D4 to the new daycare, should I file an emergency motion to block the disruption that I feel is not in D4's interests? Just looking for other opinions to compare to my counsel's.
Background: Ex and I have 50/50 joint custody of D4 with a judge-signed custody agreement. D4 has been attending the same daycare/preschool since turning 1. Shortly after split, Ex moved less than 2km away from my home. Both Ex and I work 3 km away from the neighbourhood.
Last year, Ex moved without notice to suburb, 24 km away from my home, in a different municipal district than is in the custody agreement for D4's agreed residence. I had no complaints at the time as the preschool and transition arrangements were not changing, thus D4 still would mostly be in her habitual residence. Ex still works in the same location near the current daycare.
Ex now insists that preschool be changed to a preschool near their new residence. Ex also strongly suggests school should be there too.
Ex also says that if we don't agree, they will just split to the new preschool for their parenting time while I retain the old preschool, which not only would be a disruption to D4's routine (two daycares) but would increase our costs by $500 monthly each. Once Ex claimed they would do this unilaterally, I involved my lawyer.
I am getting inconsistent reasons justifying this proposed change to the status quo. Originally it was due to the daycare facility being "older", and that the teachers at the current daycare were in many cases "ESL" (not kidding) where Ex would prefer native English speakers. Now, after a couple months of back and forth, the Ex is claiming the current preschool is negligent and D4 is being emotionally and/or physically harmed by attending. There is no such evidence to my knowledge. Daycare has notified us about the odd shoving match when arguing over a toy, or tantrums during class transitions. Ex is trying to turn these relatively minor incidents into a case against the preschool. Ex has been combative with the daycare administrators over this subject, even threatening legal action if they tried to provide counselling or evaluation services for D4.
Lawyers have now exchanged two letters over the disagreement, and Ex's lawyer is insisting on mediation "immediately", "or else" they will unilaterally move to new preschool on Ex's parenting time.
I'm not sure what is there to mediate: this feels like an ultimatum in the guise of "you're not communicating". We are communicating, Ex just doesn't seem to like the message, or that I insist on email communication and not face-to-face.
Thoughts? Is this a losing battle because it is on Ex's time (subject to Section 7 adjustments)? Or if Ex unilaterally moves D4 to the new daycare, should I file an emergency motion to block the disruption that I feel is not in D4's interests? Just looking for other opinions to compare to my counsel's.
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