What is the effect of a domestic assault conviction on my chances for custody

[DadInNeedOfHelp]

Hi, can someone speak to my chances of joint custody in light of a single domestic assault conviction. I admitted immediately to it.

Please don't judge, there is a lot to the story, too much to go into here.

Thanks

[standing on the sidelines]

how long ago did it happen, were the kid(s) around when it happened, what steps have you taken to make sure it doesnt happen again, any previous record?

[arabian]

if you have enrolled yourself in anger management i think it would help. My ex did that at the recommendation of the police.

[mom2three]

Isolated incidents tend to be 'the straw that broke the camels back' and judges see it all the time.

Anger management classes is an awesome idea. It would probably be one of the best things you do for yourself.

As for affecting custody, it is unlikely, unless the other party whoops it up into a high conflict issue.

The act was not directed at the children, and it was an isolated incident. But, it will be part of the consideration of the best interests of the children IF your situation ever gets that far. How much weight a judge would place on one incident is anybody's guess though.

[DadInNeedOfHelp]

It happened on Feb 2, 2012, yes the kids were around. I plead guilty immediately, took the PARS course voluntarity, i am attending in 'caring dads' and 'Anger Mangement for Parents'.

I have no previous record what so ever.

[SadAndTired]

What I find sort of amazing is that orgy Dad who wants to be a part of his child's life gets vilified but this man, who admits to assaulting someone in front of his kids, gets a pass??

To me, a sexual act with consenting adults doesn't equal bad parent.

If the OP could have a "single" domestic assault, maybe that anger could be directed to a child.

[standing on the sidelines]

who says this guy is getting a free pass?? He admitted guilt ( i take it there was a police charge), took the steps to correct his behaviour and has no previous record.

To the OP you are taking the right steps but no one can say for sure how things would turn out for you.

[mom2three]

What I find sort of amazing is that orgy Dad who wants to be a part of his child's life gets vilified but this man, who admits to assaulting someone in front of his kids, gets a pass??

To me, a sexual act with consenting adults doesn't equal bad parent.

If the OP could have a "single" domestic assault, maybe that anger could be directed to a child.

Not everyone vilified him.

We need to take a good hard looks within ourselves before we begin to judge another person.

OP: keep doing what you are doing. Be kind and compassionate to the other parent. Be the best Dad that you can be. And never forget that WE are all human and do incredibly stupid acts; you do your best to apologize to those you hurt, learn to forgive yourself and shut out those that judge you.

[SadAndTired]

SOS, I didn't mean in real life, I just meant in responses from the board.

And yes, M23, I didn't say everyone at all and I totally agree with what you said above. I do believe people make mistakes and can learn from those. I am not saying that the OP in this thread cannot be a great Dad. I am just commenting on the responses in this post versus the other.

[DadInNeedOfHelp]

thank you all for your responses.

My wife left me with the kids while I was at work about a month ago. Complete surprise to me.

She said CAS made her do it, but noone at CAS has given me anything in writing stating what their concerns are. I have taken it to the Director level to try and get a response.

I am fearful I have been painted in a certain light to CAS by my wife. I am fearful that if I get a lawyer to file a motion for access/custody, that if CAS does have an issue with my access my children, that the motion will blow up in my face.

So right now I am sticking with trying to get a written position out of CAS but i fear that the longer i wait to file the motion the worse off my chances of access/custody are.

[DadInNeedOfHelp]

SadAndTired, its your type of hypothecial's that are throwing me under the bus, 'maybee it could be directed at a child'.

You don't know me, or my situation. I am a very involved father, with a wife who has mental health issues, which have only recently become very clear to me.

I have admitted my wrong doing and am trying to do right by my family.

Jerk

[standing on the sidelines]

It happened on Feb 2, 2012, yes the kids were around. I plead guilty immediately, took the PARS course voluntarity, i am attending in 'caring dads' and 'Anger Mangement for Parents'.

I have no previous record what so ever.

did you mean 2013??

[DadInNeedOfHelp]

no - 2012, i plead guilty, was discharged, crown appealed, received suspended sentence and prob.

[DadInNeedOfHelp]

during 2012, my wife came back, but it was strained to say the least, I was afraid to even look at her the wrong way. If I disagreed with anything, she was on the phone to anyone who would listen.

[SadAndTired]

SadAndTired, its your type of hypothecial's that are throwing me under the bus, 'maybee it could be directed at a child'.

You don't know me, or my situation. I am a very involved father, with a wife who has mental health issues, which have only recently become very clear to me.

I have admitted my wrong doing and am trying to do right by my family.

Jerk

I am not trying to throw you under the bus. I witnessed family violence as a child and can't tell you how impactful it is on children. Even just one episode.

I am glad to hear that you are seeking help and hope that it was just a single episode. If your ex has the mental issues you are claiming, the kids will need you more than ever.