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Is there a max distance seperated wife can take child

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  • Is there a max distance seperated wife can take child

    I am currently living with my wife, seperated and in the inlaw suite downstairs, been like that for 14 months. We will be selling the house this spring, and we agered on that.

    I hear from friends that she is planning a quiet quick move to a location 4 hours from here, where roads become dangerous and impassable through the mountains at times in he winter, she is planning on registering them for school and getting things setup right away(guess that will help her get away with it easier).

    What is the best thing to do to keep her close to my/our current location, 2 kids 5 and 14, she does not have a very good job or any kind of training or education for any serious kind of career or job, we have lived here for 30 months now, my job is secure good paying, but it requires on call 24/7, and could be away up to 40 hours at a time some times....until my seniority becomes better. I can not really spend enough time at home with kids(due to work) to try for full custody or similar but would like the kids to stay close to where they are.

    My family is all on the prairies, I am in BC, so getting help from family is a bit difficult for looking after the kids...for now.

    Any ideas very much appreciated and this forum is great!

    PS...The 14 year old just got through a change in schools and is finally settling down on her grades after being a bada$$ trying to situate herself here...don't want her doing that again and the 5 yr old is pretty sensitive to change...

  • #2
    There is no limit per say, a parent can move any where they want. However, the kids should remain within a reasonable distance to both parents so that they can maintain a meaningful relationship with both parents.

    First, your ex should advise you in writing of her plan to move and where. This notice should be provided 30-60 days a head of any move. Once you are provided with the notice, you respond in writing advising her that you disagree with her plans to relocate the child as you don't believe it is in the childrens best interests and does not allow you an opportunity for meaningful parenting time.

    Should she do a midnight move with the kids, the very next morning you get your lawyer to file an emergency motion to have the kids returned to their familiar location, interm custody any parenting time for the ex. A parent can move anywhere they want, but one can't unilaterally move the kids anywhere they want if their move would have a negative impact on the other parents ability to spend meaningful time with the kids.

    What have you negotiated for parenting time? I assume if you are near the end of the process, you have brought this up. You should be documenting all that you do for the kids. If you cook dinner, help with homework, tuck them in at night, get them off to school etc. You need to show that, even though your work is on call, when you are around you are an involved parent.

    Your job sucks from a parenting perspective. But, it is what it is. If you had 50/50, you'd just get care providers to help with the kids when you are working. If you are out of town for a long time, well the ex should be provided the opportunity to care for the kids. If they refuse, you should find reasonable care providers on your own.

    But the most important thing is to be involved as much as you can be. Document your time with your kids and what you do. Make sure you are spending quality time with them. And should your ex try to move without your consent, file a motion in court to have the kids returned. Or, try and pre-emptive strike of requesting that a clause be put in the agreement restricting each parent from relocating with the kids outside of their current school district.

    Just know that there is no guarantee that the ex won't be allowed to move with the kids. Should this end up in court the ex will have to provide argument that the move is in the kids best interests. That could mean she is able to get significantly more meaningful employment, she will have a better support stucture (family) around her etc. The caselaw on point is Gordon v Goertz (search canlii).

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by HammerDad View Post
      Just know that there is no guarantee that the ex won't be allowed to move with the kids. Should this end up in court the ex will have to provide argument that the move is in the kids best interests. That could mean she is able to get significantly more meaningful employment, she will have a better support stucture (family) around her etc. The caselaw on point is Gordon v Goertz (search canlii).
      And, just in case you think there is any maximum distance, the supreme court in the Gordon v Goertz case allowed the mother to bring the kids to Australia.

      Can't get much farther than that

      Comment


      • #4
        OP, I put together a thread that addresses the vast majority of your questions and provided new and fresh jurisprudence on the matter of parents wanting to move out of a child's habitual residential jurisdiction.

        I hope it addresses your concerns and questions.

        http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...sidence-14033/

        Comment


        • #5
          Thankyou, I don't think she cares, will not agree to any mediation etc....her way or the highway...I will have to do some reading and planning even if planning won't stop her...too bad the only reason she is dragging the kids away is because there are more men in the big city to choose from :-(

          Thanks for the tips and links!!

          Comment


          • #6
            From Denis v. Oborowsky, 2006 SKQB 486 (CanLII) CanLII - 2006 SKQB 486 (CanLII) the judge ruled that 40 minutes drive time wasn't unreasonable to drive the kids to school in a shared custody arrangement (alternating weeks).

            [29]...The petitioner currently drives to Saskatoon daily for employment purposes, and the roughly 40 minutes it takes to drive from Rosthern to Saskatoon is not so far as to make it impossible to have the children continue their normal seven-day rotation with the petitioner in Rosthern while attending school in Saskatoon. Many children in rural settings spend that amount of time on a bus to get to or from school, and even in the City of Saskatoon, there will be instances where parents are separated and living in different parts of the city where a 20-minute drive is not out of the question. Even before the move to Rosthern, the petitioner was driving these children across the city to attend school.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by minefield View Post
              From Denis v. Oborowsky, 2006 SKQB 486 (CanLII) CanLII - 2006 SKQB 486 (CanLII) the judge ruled that 40 minutes drive time wasn't unreasonable to drive the kids to school in a shared custody arrangement (alternating weeks).

              [29]...The petitioner currently drives to Saskatoon daily for employment purposes, and the roughly 40 minutes it takes to drive from Rosthern to Saskatoon is not so far as to make it impossible to have the children continue their normal seven-day rotation with the petitioner in Rosthern while attending school in Saskatoon. Many children in rural settings spend that amount of time on a bus to get to or from school, and even in the City of Saskatoon, there will be instances where parents are separated and living in different parts of the city where a 20-minute drive is not out of the question. Even before the move to Rosthern, the petitioner was driving these children across the city to attend school.
              It takes me 45 minutes to take my kids to school every day and that's within the city. Traffic is a bitch.

              Comment


              • #8
                It takes me 27 minutes, 29 if I get both red lights. I live in the country and drive my kids 3x per week to school. Sadly, my ex thinks this is unacceptable, though it's been status quo since we separated 2 years ago. I have a case conference in 2 week so I'll be able to address this a little better when a judge gives an opinion. I doubt it will be an issue.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Also, I would like to have full custody of my step daughter and daughter although I would be away from home a lot and need lots of extra care for them. Is there some paperwork or something I should do like file for full or joint custody ahead of time before she takes off with the kids, or does it matter, I would rather take care of it ahead of time rather than wait until she bolts with the kids and then have to call the lawyer up and start things rolling then to have the kids brought back or whatever would be possible....I am sure the lawyer would suggest whatever makes more money for him....I just want whats easier and cheaper of course!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by undersc0re View Post
                    ....I am sure the lawyer would suggest whatever makes more money for him....I just want whats easier and cheaper of course!
                    And when you say easier, you mean for the kids - that's the focus my friend in family court.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Is there not something that the OP can do to prevent the children from being registered to a new school? If they are currently enrolled somewhere now does the school board automatically enroll them for the next school year or does it require the parents to re-apply?

                      Will the school board accept an application with only one parents siganture?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Canadaguy View Post
                        Is there not something that the OP can do to prevent the children from being registered to a new school? If they are currently enrolled somewhere now does the school board automatically enroll them for the next school year or does it require the parents to re-apply?

                        Will the school board accept an application with only one parents siganture?
                        1. The parent can notify the school that their written consent is required to make any changes to the school registration and to notify them if there is any attempt to change the children in question's school.

                        2. The presumption in the absence of a court order stating otherwise in Canada is full joint custody. The OP may have to spell this out for the school but, most principles understand this.

                        3. The School Boards do not willy nilly transfer children between schools. All that is required to protect the children in question's school enrolment is a simple letter identifying that the children's school should only happen on written and normalized consent of both parents or an order of the court.

                        4. The school board can get their hands slapped under the Human Rights Code if they don't respect the joint custodial rights both parents have in the matter in the absence of a court order otherwise.

                        Good Luck!
                        Tayken

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Tayken View Post
                          4. The school board can get their hands slapped under the Human Rights Code if they don't respect the joint custodial rights both parents have in the matter in the absence of a court order otherwise.
                          If this did happen can the parent do the slapping?....say with that old paddle that they used back in the good old days?

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Canadaguy View Post
                            Will the school board accept an application with only one parents siganture?
                            Last year, my ex signed up my daughter for the catholic school board, while I signed up my daughter for the public school board. Neither board bothered to contact or verify the situation with the other parent.

                            Funnily enough, she denied registering my daughter in the catholic board, so I just got a letter from the board giving the date that the child was registered. She also yelled at me for registering the daughter in the public board, when she registered in the catholic board a month before I registered.

                            So, yeah, school boards are happy enough to use a single parent's signature.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by baldclub View Post
                              And when you say easier, you mean for the kids - that's the focus my friend in family court.

                              Easier on the kids...

                              So a long while later the ex is still here I have gone to court and have fought for custody primary care and control, she decides not to show for court and tells me she can't afford a lawyer and it a waste of time and money. She is moving 4 hours away with or without the kids, and keeping the childcare from stepdaughters father for gas money to travel back to visit the kids.......she has to find any half decent full time job first before she moves there.....

                              I have a home with her on the mortgage as well as her mother who lives here and refuses to leave and she is not paying rent etc....and she has easily lived here long enough rent and bills free to pay off any amount she helped out with money wise with this place....

                              She says she will not move until she gets her money back she put into moving into the place at the start a few years ago....she will not agree to selling it either....

                              I would like to stay here with the kids, without her in this house, or if necessary sell it and start all over to get rid of her, which seems like a pain especially finding an affordable place and all the costs involved just to move somewhere close enough to keep the kids in the same school with same friends etc....

                              What is the best way to get rid of the mother inlaw when the ex leaves? Annoy the heck out of her or get some sort of court order somehow to sell the place? Even if she does move I have to get her off the mortgage anyhow so I am assuming I have to sell because she is that kind of person that would fight anything and always seems to argue her way out and turn things around on everyone.....getting side tracked here anyways just want to get rid of ex and mother inlaw off the mortgage papers....and out of the house eventually....

                              Lawyer says wait until ex moves out and we will progress things along....just wondering if I can do anything else if anyone here has suggestions.....

                              The home, if sold would break even $$$$$ if I am lucky.

                              Comment

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