OCL Disclosure Meeting tomorrow

[Access Dad]

Well folks, the day of my OCL disclosure meeting has finally come. Tomorrow morning I find out whether or not the investigator will be recommending unsupervised, extended and overnight access to me.

I've done everything that is within my power to show this man that I am no longer a risk to my daughter's safety and just how serious I take my sobriety and my second chance at life.

I just hope he sees that my daughter needs to be rid of supervised access and that I have delivered everything in my power to make it happen.

I also wanted to thank so many of you who have given me your kind, supportive and encouraging words. It means so much at a time like this, especially from people who have been through it and are going through it.

Wish me luck and I'll let everyone know what happens just as soon as I get home.

God Bless,
AD

[FaithandMorals]

Luck!! Luck!!

[WorkingDAD]

Good luck and do not do anyhting stupid whatever recommendations will be. Remember it's just recommendations.

[macdonaldgal]

I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. I think you will be happy!

[SingingDad]

Just keep in mind that what's said in the meeting isn't always how things will be presented in the report. I know in my case, while the recommendations didn't change (obviously), the way the information was portrayed in the final report was very different than how it was presented in the meeting. I am very interested to know it went.

[hadenough]

Best of Luck, AccessDad! Fingers crossed for you

[NBDad]

Keep us posted man! I'd say G'luck...but you don't need it. You have done everything you are supposed to.

[Access Dad]

Well everyone, I had the OCL disclosure meeting today.

I basically got what I wanted but I just have to wait 3 months for it.

As many of you know I am seeking unsupervised, extended and holiday access with my daughter. Access was supervised in the first place because of a drug problem I had. I have now been clean and sober for almost 20 months. My daughter has never been alone with me, never been to my home and never been with me under the supervision of someone other than my ex, her mother, or recently, the staff at a Supervised Access Center. She is 7 yrs old.

Today the OCL recommended that my access remain supervised for a period of three months. The file will remain open for this period. The immediate change is that the access will now take place in MY HOME (Yayyy!) supervised by my parents who are retired and live about a 10 minute drive away. After 3 months, the same OCL guy will re-assess the situation and if everything goes as it has been going, unsupervised, EOW and split of holidays will follow.

The OCL praised my being clean and sober for more than a year and a half. However, given how powerfully addictive crystal meth (the drug I used) is, he would feel more confortable if we see how the 3 months goes first.

He also gave me independent direct access to my daughter's school and medical information and that I be allowed to attend parent-eacher meetings.

My ex was pissed as hell. I mean she was almost crying she was so upset - and for what? because I get a typical access regime of EOW and split holidays??? C'mon lady, do you hate me that much? Get over yourself. My God.

Anyways, we'll be sending her an Offer that reproduces the OCL recommendations. I do not believe she'll accept. I don't know what happens in the event she doesn't want to follow the recommendations.

All in all, I feel good. I have been through alot to get clean and sober and I have worked hard to build a new life as a responsible adult. I think the 3 month waiting period is just fine with me. I can appreciate the investigator's concerns given my drug history and if he thinks that 3 more months is what it takes for him to be comfortable, then I accept that proudly.

At least my daughter will finally get to be with me in my own home which something I've wanted her see for years. And I'll have supervisors (my parents) that won't be so biased against me.

BTW, the Access Center observation reports helped me a great deal. The OCL read all of them since February and he said not a single report disclosed anything other than a loving, affectionate and attentive relationship with me and my little girl.

I know there's a ways to go yet, but I'm happy about this OCL investigation.

Thanks everyone!

[hadenough]

^ AWESOME! Good for you. Happy to hear your news and I truly feel you have committed yourself to making this work and doing that little girl, proud. High Fives.

[madm82]

Way to go! It is great to see a parent that can recognize past faults, do their best to fix them, all for the sake of their child. If only there were more dedicated people out there

[mcdreamy]

I'm proud of you, Access Dad!
Congratulations. I can only imagine the inner strength it has taken for you to come this far, stay strong.

[SingingDad]

AWESOME NEWS!!! I'm really happy for you, but I'm most happy for your daughter who will now be able to spend more time bonding with her loving father.

SD

[arabian]

good news! contrats on successfully working your program - good Dad!