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Political Issues This forum is for discussing the political aspects of divorce: reform to divorce laws, men's rights, women's rights, injustices in the divorce system, etc.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 10-24-2015, 02:35 PM
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Exactly, he should recognize more than anybody else that the default mom gets custody would have been his fate if he hadn't been in his exceptional circumstances. He was in sole custody of his dad, he must recognize the value of fathers even if he is as busy as a prime minister.
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Old 10-26-2015, 08:30 AM
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I just want to add my name to this thread as someone who would like to take my anger and frustration at this nonsensical system to the next level.

I don't look on this forum every day as I need to compartmentalize the rage and sleepless nights that go along with dealing with this crap.

I am "fortunate" if you like in that my 2 kids are in University and therefore old enough that custody is not an issue (though she fought tooth and nail for sole). I have an excellent relationship with both.

My issues are purely financial... This time, as they have moved out of her place to attend school, the CS rules change (i.e. no table support, all s.7). Our divorce order clearly states CS rules to be adjusted in this circumstance. I basically proposed to make CS payments directly to the kids (which would pretty much cover the s.7 obligation). She said an emphatic NO. I made a Motion, and am waiting 4 months for the CC, which I'm sure will lead nowhere. SC to follow (another 4 months(?)), then trial probably a year after the original motion.

Meanwhile, she's banking massive CS payments.... she places kids squarely in the middle and they're super stressed about uni payments, expenses, etc.

"It's all Dads fault" because he refuses to pay your schooling.

This crap is hung up in courts for a YEAR... with no guarantee she'll pay back the money she is so obviously not entitled to.

What utter, complete crap. How anyone can possibly say this system operates in "the best interests of the children" is beyond me.

Anyway... enough venting.. there has to be a way to channel this negative energy into something positive... I know the financial self-interest of the legal system trumps any human concerns... so how do we start to build momentum to get around that??
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Old 10-26-2015, 09:04 AM
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Someguy, has your ex registered with FRO? If yes then the motion is best bet. If no, why havent you stopped? Are you subtracting the CS amounts paid from the living expenses you are being asked to cover for your kids? Because that would be how you get that money "back".
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Old 10-26-2015, 09:13 AM
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No she has not registered with the FRO... but if I were to do as you suggest (and I've certainly thought of it), she would immediately run to the FRO with the current court order to "ensure she is getting the full payments she is entitled to by order of the court".... then I've got one more layer of bureaucracy to deal with.

Does the FRO work both ways? i.e. can I use the FRO to recover money from her (should the court order as such)?
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Old 10-26-2015, 09:40 AM
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I great idea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 10-26-2015, 10:17 AM
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I would hold off then and track all your payments and all your costs for school. Take the cs overpayment off the living expenses you owe or ask the court to reduce that. Shes double dipping.

This is the bigger problem with family law---the failure to think ahead in money issues and the delays in the court. Thats where the real reform should happen. There should be a clause in agreements that show specific termination factors that maintenance agencies have to adhere to and court dates for cs issues shouldnt be a myriad of conferences, months of delays etc. there almost needs to be a separate judiciary group that reviews cs cases to get updates done immediately so things like this dont happen. (My partner is in a similar boat with cs overpayment while kid is at school and his ex has no intention of moving on fixing it, for him though his cs has increased with employment so if she wants the extra she will have to get moving).
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Old 10-26-2015, 11:54 AM
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It seems likely that the bar associations would come up with excuses for opposing the streamlining of changes to CS, because it would reduce billings for lawyers.
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Old 10-26-2015, 12:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by somethingelse View Post
It seems likely that the bar associations would come up with excuses for opposing the streamlining of changes to CS, because it would reduce billings for lawyers.
And that is exactly the root cause of the issue. Essentially Lawyer income trumps "best interests of the children". This is an incredibly sad state of affairs... and makes for a very demanding uphill climb for justice.

So what is the best route to start this petition? A single letter to your local MP would likely get nowhere... thoughts? ideas?
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Old 10-26-2015, 01:19 PM
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I highly doubt any reform will include " capping" lawyers charges. If you push compulsory mediation you will create a backlog of cases waiting for mediation and the costs of,these services will likely be equal to a lawyer.

The root of the FL problems lie in education of parental dynamics in society. Moving away from the perceived " Norm". For example now We have so many different family dynamics not just Man and Women and child, but Man and Man with child, Women and Women with child. What happens to the perceived Women bias in these situations?

What we need to do is vastly improve the beuarcratic nightmare of civil service. FRO. Should be online. Ridiculous that FRO is not linked with CRA. Ridiculous that FRO does not use online information and that you cannot email your client representative. Also why are they still using Fax to receive and send information. When they receive the faxes they scan them into their system. The errors of lost information occur at this point. We have just " faxed" 3 ordes and arrears statements. On calling FRO our client advisor told us that she only had 2 orders and 1 page of the arrears statement. We have a lawyers confirmation of the numbers of pages faxed, PLUS a reply ( fax of course) from FRO confirming the documents were received and asking specific questions of each of the 3 orders received! Our Client advisor comment was " oh, some pages are missing, perhaps not scanned".

If FRO worked efficiently then the system would be used and effective.

My rant for,the day!
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  #20 (permalink)  
Old 10-26-2015, 01:59 PM
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Alberta maintenance enforcement has been on line for many years.

Problem in Alberta though is that there is no file ownership. So when you are dealing with them you get a different individual every time. This can be problematic as, with many things in life, you are told one thing by one person and another thing by another person. The one good thing is that emailing or texting MEP results in a hard copy to which you can refer to.

Demand your provincial Liberal government get with the times with FRO online.
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