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trinton 05-12-2017 10:24 PM

Are mother's more nurturing then Fathers? Father's and Fatherhood Myths
 
Saw a comment by another poster which sort of reminded of things I learned in a parenting class dedicated to Dads.

The post was that women stayed at home raising up the men's children and essentially that men did jack all. It was a little disturbing to me that people still in this day believe that men play no role in the upbringing of children.

So I wanted to take the opportunity and share what I have learned.

TO start, there is research to suggest that babies begin responding to their father IN THE WOMB (around 22 weeks) - they will start to recognize his voice (lower, deeper, different cadence, etc). More research suggest that father's heart rates and blood pressure increase in the same way that Mom's does when your baby cries or smiles at you.

Here is the table of the statements and whether they are fact or crap

Father's are not natural "nurturers" like mothers tend to be - CRAP

Being a food father starts before your baby is born - FACT

The main role that fathers play int he lives of their children is to be the "provider" and "disciplinarian" - CRAP

Mothers can better deal with children's emotional issues than fathers - CRAP

Dad's main role in the lives of his kids are about play and games - CRAP

Having a supportive father can impact how a child developed relationships later on in their life - FACT

Fathers continue to be an important part of their child'children's live even after separation or divorce - FACT

Teenage fathers (men who become fathers in their teenage years) often don't care about their children - CRAP

Teenagers need father's just as much as toddlers and kids - FACT

IF you had a disconnected relationship with your father while you were growing up, you are destined to be a disconnected father to your children - CRAP

arabian 05-12-2017 10:27 PM

I would love to see the actual literature which was given to you by the place that you took your "parenting class dedicated to DADS." This seems incredible (far-fetched) to me. If you have the hand-outs that states word-for-word of the above why don't you post them on here for everyone to read?

trinton 05-12-2017 10:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by arabian (Post 220542)
If you have the hand-outs that states word-for-word of the above why don't you post them on here for everyone to read?

You want to see the evidence? LOL. I've typed out the handout word for word. Are you perhaps a little disturbed that women's shelters aren't the only things out there and that there are things out there for dads?

PS. You know I love ya (of course not in any wrong way).

arabian 05-12-2017 10:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trinton (Post 220544)
You want to see the evidence? LOL. I've typed out the handout word for word. Are you perhaps a little disturbed that women's shelters aren't the only things out there and that there are things out there for dads?

PS. You know I love ya (of course not in any wrong way).

Triton you were probably still in school when parenting courses evolved. News alert: parenting courses are for both parents. In Alberta they are mandatory before any matter is heard in the courts. And yes, the courts do verify both parents have completed them.

Triton I do pray that your daughter never has to go to a women's shelter when she is older. Sometimes women who have to go to a shelter don't even tell their family about the abuse because they are ashamed.... they don't want their family to know what their husband is really like.

arabian 05-12-2017 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trinton (Post 220544)
You want to see the evidence? LOL. I've typed out the handout word for word. Are you perhaps a little disturbed that women's shelters aren't the only things out there and that there are things out there for dads?

PS. You know I love ya (of course not in any wrong way).

And of course you have written a letter to the director/powers- that-be of the place where you took your course, outlining your objection ????

No I didn't think so. Easier just to bitch and gurn on here.

trinton 05-12-2017 11:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by arabian (Post 220546)
Triton you were probably still in school when parenting courses evolved. News alert: parenting courses are for both parents. In Alberta they are mandatory before any matter is heard in the courts. And yes, the courts do verify both parents have completed them.

Guess what this ain't Alberta. What parents have to go here is a Mandatory Information Program. The course I took is for dads, but mom's could attend as well. It wouldn't hurt for moms to learn about these facts and craps. I actually raised that at the end the class when the facilitator was taking in questions and/or suggestions. There is also a Caring Dads program offered by our local Children's Aid Society. You should look it up.

No one asked me to take these parenting courses and I was never ordered to take them. I take parenting courses with an open mind just cause I love our kid that much (and because I love to learn).

trinton 05-12-2017 11:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by arabian (Post 220547)
And of course you have written a letter to the director/powers- that-be of the place where you took your course, outlining your objection ????

No I didn't think so. Easier just to bitch and gurn on here.

How are you so sure. I don't think you have any idea of all the advocacy I have done for fathers in my community nor are you aware of all the different people I have spoken to.

I'm starting to suspect you might be upset about the things I posted in your thread so you are here to do the same to my thread and that's okay - I don't have a whole lot against you personally.

arabian 05-12-2017 11:26 PM

Since taking your course have you followed-up with them to see if they have modified their hand-outs?

Have you written to the DIRECTOR? Talking to a facilitator probably isn't going to cut it. Facilitator/group leader is likely given material to use.

Have you conducted a survey of all the Dad-parenting courses to find out if any other courses use similar hand-out?

Have you spoken to your MP about the issue (of course you would have all the results of your survey)?

Do you know who funds the Dad-parenting course you took and others like it?

trinton 05-12-2017 11:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by arabian (Post 220553)
Since taking your course have you followed-up with them to see if they have modified their hand-outs?

Why do they need to modify their handout?


Quote:

Originally Posted by arabian (Post 220553)
Have you written to the DIRECTOR? Talking to a facilitator probably isn't going to cut it. Facilitator/group leader is likely given material to use.

Their policy doesn't discriminate against genders. Women could sign up. They just don't. They don't seem to interested. Can't force women to attend a course that talks about a father's role.


Quote:

Originally Posted by arabian (Post 220553)
Have you conducted a survey of all the Dad-parenting courses to find out if any other courses use similar hand-out?

Nope. This is the only one course that popped up in the organization I'm taking parenting courses. The only other one I am aware of is the one offered by children's aid society, but that one is generally for abusive men. I didn't take that one as I don't wish to be likened with those men.


Quote:

Originally Posted by arabian (Post 220553)
Have you spoken to your MP about the issue (of course you would have all the results of your survey)?

What is the issue? I don't think there are any issues. What is your concern with this course? That women don't attend? What could I do to have them attend?

Quote:

Originally Posted by arabian (Post 220553)
Do you know who funds the Dad-parenting course you took and others like it?

This one is actually a course that you pay for our of your own pocket. The other one is funded by our local Children's Aid Society.

This course advertises:

"Dads play a unique, Important and changing role in their families today.
Join a group of fathers to learn about child development and parenting skills.
BUild upon your strengths and potential to become the best dad you can be!" It's one of many parenting courses that they offer. "

Any other questions ?

Soiled 05-12-2017 11:41 PM

I think the issue is with how you worded your post.

The way it reads, the bolded CRAP or FACT seem as though they are your interpretation of the statement. I'm guessing from your responses to Arabian that that is not the case?


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