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Political Issues This forum is for discussing the political aspects of divorce: reform to divorce laws, men's rights, women's rights, injustices in the divorce system, etc.

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Old 05-07-2016, 09:24 PM
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Ok so lets the guy ejaculates, let's say it was a ONS or they are broken up the week later... Is it considered "reasonable/normal" or a woman in that state to not get an abortion? I am assuming if you are having casual sex you aren't that conservative or religious to be against abortion.

Would you prefer to keep a "fatherless" child and fight for child support etc....

If I knew I were going to get divorced I don't think I would have had kids (as much as I love my kids).

Trying to actually understand how this situation comes about... is it irresponsibility on both parties?
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Old 05-07-2016, 09:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
It's a serious question...

I am trying to understand what guy willingly gets a girl pregnant and then wants nothing to do with the child or mother?

I mean, do they know about the pregnancy and ask the girl to have an abortion and she refuses?
Does he just ignore her the night after?

Its a bit weird....
its not a serious question at all. Its just your typical way of thinking. That all women are out to trap and live off a man.
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Old 05-08-2016, 10:25 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
Ok so lets the guy ejaculates, let's say it was a ONS or they are broken up the week later... Is it considered "reasonable/normal" or a woman in that state to not get an abortion? I am assuming if you are having casual sex you aren't that conservative or religious to be against abortion.

Would you prefer to keep a "fatherless" child and fight for child support etc....

If I knew I were going to get divorced I don't think I would have had kids (as much as I love my kids).

Trying to actually understand how this situation comes about... is it irresponsibility on both parties?
My thoughts:

Some women don't believe in having abortions, for completely non-religious reasons. Some women may actually want a child, despite the state of their relationship, or lack thereof. Some women may not believe a man would completely vanish on a child. Some women may be terrified of surgery. Some women may be young and scared and in denial.

I think (most) men who have casual sex blithely assume that there won't be a pregnancy, no matter how much or how little effort he puts into prevention. When a pregnancy occurs, they then assume that the woman will 'take care of it' herself, meaning either abortion or solo parenting with no support from him.

I think (most) women who have casual sex blithely assume that there is always a chance there may be a pregnancy, no matter how much or how little effort she puts into prevention. They assume that if a pregnancy occurs, the guy is responsible enough to either respect her choice to have an abortion, or step up and help support the child.

I understand what you are saying though, because I, too, would not have chosen to have children had I known their father and I would end up divorced. Actually, I would have chosen not to even get married to him. I assume I would have met someone else and had equally wonderful but different children, or have been childless but perhaps avoided the pain of infidelity and divorce.

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Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
its not a serious question at all. Its just your typical way of thinking. That all women are out to trap and live off a man.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
It's a serious question...

I am trying to understand what guy willingly gets a girl pregnant and then wants nothing to do with the child or mother?

I mean, do they know about the pregnancy and ask the girl to have an abortion and she refuses?
Does he just ignore her the night after?

Its a bit weird....
An irresponsible guy. All of us responsible and diligent people have trouble understanding the other side. You have to deal with that sort of person as they really are though, not as you would wish them to be.

In a perfect world, conception wouldn't occur unless both parents were ready, willing and able to be good parents together. Needless to say, the world isn't perfect and nor are people.

Last edited by Rioe; 05-08-2016 at 10:27 AM.
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Old 05-08-2016, 02:38 PM
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Well, hes not the only one responsible for using condoms. Women are equally as responsible for using protection. It works both ways.
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Old 05-08-2016, 05:28 PM
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According to our legislation, child support is the right of the child. Both parents are responsible for a child they may intentionally or unintentionally bring into the world.

The act of intercourse may result in pregnancy. Therefore participants are equally responsible for the consequences of their actions.

I do not believe there are any exceptions to this. Abstinence is the only "option."
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Old 05-08-2016, 06:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
its not a serious question at all. Its just your typical way of thinking. That all women are out to trap and live off a man.
I don't appreciate this at all. You are continuously trying to paint me with a brush as a sexist or something.

I am just trying to understand who would give birth to a child knowing the father doesn't want it and does not want to love or support it (the child)... Is it just the edge case of the person who has casual sex but is against abortion?

Is this something as a society we consider as favourable?
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Old 05-08-2016, 06:05 PM
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Quote:
intentionally
The law is clear, that isn't what I am asking.

The issue I have is - As a parent who wants to love your future child do you knowingly bring it in to this world hated, unwanted and fatherless and then attempt to oblige that person to financially support your choice?

Last edited by Links17; 05-08-2016 at 06:10 PM.
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Old 05-08-2016, 06:09 PM
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Any woman here against early term abortion for non-religious reasons?
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Old 05-08-2016, 06:14 PM
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I know a young woman who really wanted to have a child. When she did become pregnant she likely had hopes and dreams, like anyone else in her situation, that future would be good. I believe that the young woman simply did not have any comprehension of the cost of raising a child. Now the grandparents pay for pretty much everything.

Some people go through with pregnancy for many reasons.... hoping the father will 'come to his senses and commit to a relationship (change)' and others simply want to have a child regardless if the father is in the picture or not.

In the end though, if someone participates in sex and it results in pregnancy, they will be responsible for the child for the next 20+ years - like it or not. It is not really debatable.

What I fail to understand is how a woman, who is already struggling with one or two children, goes ahead and has more children. I think I'd opt for having my tubes tied if I found I had no self-restraint so as to not put myself and my children into a deeper financial abyss. That's just my personal view though. Others may have religious convictions that propel them to have many children even if the father isn't around?

Not everyone thinks ahead.
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Old 05-08-2016, 06:19 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
Any woman here against early term abortion for non-religious reasons?

I believe that pregnancy prevention is a much more palatable approach to birth control. Males and females can have surgical procedures (tubal ligation/vasectomy), take birth control or abstain from sex.
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