Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Political Issues

Political Issues This forum is for discussing the political aspects of divorce: reform to divorce laws, men's rights, women's rights, injustices in the divorce system, etc.

Closed Thread
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 04-14-2009, 11:42 AM
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Ontario
Posts: 12
Katie41 is on a distinguished road
Default Denied Access

I pay child support and have an agreement in place that allows me generous access to my sons with two weeks notice to my ex. this was put in place when I lived out of province. I have since moved back to the same province as the children and in fact live 10 minutes away. I have been denied access to them since I refused to allow one of them to move into my house when they, my ex and his wife, got sick of his attitude. I didn't do it because I didn't want him, I did it because he had to realize he can't just get rid of the children when he doesn't want them.

I don't know what to do now. I am still paying support, would prefer not to obviously but also am tired of paying for lawyers when he doesn't have to. He has this uncanny way of getting everything for free.

Any advice anyone could give me.

Thanks,
  #2 (permalink)  
Old 04-14-2009, 12:27 PM
billm's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,430
billm is on a distinguished road
Default

Support and access are not related.

You have an obligation to pay support for your children based on your income.

Your ex has an obligation to support access. I suggest you write down what you want and discuss it with him.
  #3 (permalink)  
Old 04-14-2009, 12:29 PM
billm's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,430
billm is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Katie41 View Post
... I refused to allow one of them to move into my house when they, my ex and his wife, got sick of his attitude. I didn't do it because I didn't want him, I did it because he had to realize he can't just get rid of the children when he doesn't want them.
...
I agree with the decision, but your reasons are focused on your ex and not your child. Focus on the childs needs, not on teaching your ex lessons in parenting.
  #4 (permalink)  
Old 04-14-2009, 02:24 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 560
AtALoss is on a distinguished road
Default

As the others say try to focus on the needs of the child. In defense of the child, Could their acting out be a way of saying they are not happy with the present arrangements and by acting out they may be trying to get their needs heard? Just a thought... Another consideration that comes to my mind immediately is, I have a 10 yr old who is really being pulled by my ex to go against what she wants. My position has been all along I am not standing in the way of their relationship all I ask is the trueth from her. Recently it turned out she sad she wanted to go live with Dad I said wel if that is what you want then it can happen. She was very upset by having that happen. As it turned out she came to me and said she only said that she was mad at me. We talked she is still with me but the ground rules have been laid out and she is happy with them too. They being that I will not put up with this being used to punish me or that she can run away from the situation when she wants. Told her too that we will have disagreements and that she will at Dads too esp when she is a teen. But I think you get the drift. The kids can manipulate the situation too. I think this is worthey of a heart to heart among all of you. Sort out what is really going on.
Closed Thread


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Are you denied access to your children? Ihave2kidsIcannotsee Divorce & Family Law 10 02-19-2010 02:26 AM
Have I given up my rights as a parent? brokendad Common Law Issues 3 11-05-2009 07:57 PM
are a mother or father and denied access? Ihave2kidsIcannotsee Divorce & Family Law 12 02-16-2009 07:43 PM
Are you denied access to your children? Ihave2kidsIcannotsee Divorce & Family Law 1 01-27-2009 09:35 AM
Case Conference Info tycooke Divorce & Family Law 9 07-12-2006 10:11 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 05:41 PM.