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Old 02-28-2011, 10:18 AM
NSL NSL is offline
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So, long story short, my husband wants out. I have suggested counselling, but he thinks we are over, there is no hope. There is evidence of adultery, which I no has no bearing on the details of the divorce, but I just thought I should mention that. My main concern is being able to keep our house, so that our kids (2 girls, ages 5 and 3) can have some semblance of normalcy in their lives. The house is worth about $420K, with a mortgage and LOC for a combined owing of $180K. So, $240K, give or take. This was my childhood home, so it also has sentimental value.

I have been steadily employed throughout our marriage, with salaries increasing. My husband was fired for gross misconduct in January of 2010. He was unemployed and unable to collect EI until April of 2010, at which point he secured full time employment at a salary decrease of $7,500 gross. He was let go of this second job in February of 2011. He has since found work which is paid by the hour and guarantees only 20 hours per week, though he has gotten more than that most weeks.

He wants me to continue to supplement him for the next three months or so, at which point he will move out. He has moved out of our bedroom. I would like to divide debts, etc. from the point he wanted to leave, which was this past weekend, and we each pay half of the expenses. He doesn't not make enough to contribute his half, but his father can assist him.

In addition, he was recently served with garnishment papers from a former landlord, from before we even started dating. Can I be liable for this? He has since fought it and if the Régie de Logement in Quebec sides with the landlord, his next step is court.

I will be borrowing the money to buy him out from my sister, so while I wish to be fair, there is only so much I can borrow. I would be taking over the payment for the LOC and the mortgage. Also, I don't know how much bearing this has, but I paid off his student loan.

I guess I'm just wondering where to start? Thanks for reading.
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Old 02-28-2011, 10:28 AM
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How long were you together? He may have a SS claim in addition to division of family property.

What will the living arrangements for the children be? Willl you have primary residence or will it be shared parenting? That will affect CS.

You need to do some serious reading on equalization of family property. It would seem that you owe him $120K for the home but there will be other factors that will be relevant in dividing family property, such as that student loan, pensions and RRSP's if any.
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Old 02-28-2011, 10:40 AM
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We were married in 2003. I'm wondering how long calculation for SSs go back? Because prior to the first firing, he was making significantly more than me. I did read 5 years someplace, but it seems some people think you can go back further?

I do have a gov't pension, which I have no problem sharing when I get it, but I don't have that kind of cash now. He also has RRSP's, which we rolled back into RRSP's when he was fired from the first job.

I actually wasn't looking for any CS, because he wants to share the kids equally, one week here and one week there.
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Old 02-28-2011, 10:59 AM
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How long were you together before you got married? That is relevant for SS purposes as well.

When you divide family property you value the pension at marriage (or cohab date whichever is earlier) and again at separation date. You owe him half the increase in value. While you are free to work out your own deal, it is common to pay him out for that when you settle, not down the road when you start collecting the pension. Do you really want to be in bed with him financially. Most folks want a clean break. Some pensions provide for a spousal transfer on marital breakdown so that is a way to pay him out without giving up cash.

Again, you need to do a lot of reading to wrap your head around division of family property.

If you are in a shared parenting situation, you are going to owe him CS based on a setoff method.
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Old 02-28-2011, 11:27 AM
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Well, if I'm going to owe him CS it looks like I won't be able to keep the house. I will look into that clause in my pension. Sure, in an ideal world I'd love to pay him off and be done with him, but it will take every cent I can get my hand on to even attempt to buy him out.
Is there any chance you can point me in the direction of info. regarding inheritances? I know the part of my inheritance that was put into the matrimonial home is lost, but what about that which was used for other things?
Also, I've been following a few threads regarding a first home, if it belonged to one person, and because the matrimonial home as soon as you married. I owned home A, and my husband moved into it. This was however before we were married or common-law. House A was sold to buy house B, which was put in both names, and we married a few months after buying house B. When my father passed away, he left me and my sister the house, and we bought out my sister's half, partly with the equity from House B, and partly with the inheritance. I'm wondering if there is any hope of making a claim to any of the equity form house A, given that we were not together in it long enough for common law?
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Old 02-28-2011, 07:00 PM
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I suppose the first step is educating your self, child support is one thing, spousal support may be another, the division of assets seems unclear to you including pension, and an inheritence is gone once you blend it into the family, pehaps a little reading may help you to have a more clear understanding how things usually work out with divorce. Doesn't always seem fair but is uslually the way it goes when push comes to shove.

Ask away and you shall recieve some excellent although perhaps hard to accept advice here.
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