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  #21 (permalink)  
Old 11-27-2014, 02:46 PM
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[QUOTE=Pursuinghappiness;186509]

What process was used to determine custody the first time? Did you guys mediate, did you have a custody assessement and/or trial or did you just reach an agreement before a trial?

We were very civil throughout the breakup and agreed to not go through court. I was in love with her and was helping out as much as I could-- turns out that the agreement was made ( not under any duress ) and I had soul custody at the time because the apartment that she moved into was infested in FLEAS, therefore-- I was not allowing our son to spend the night. Until the apartment was professionally cleaned, and provided proof to me. BUT -- this is where her father stepped in and convinced your to serve me papers asking for soul custody. But the judge didn't grant that because of the written agreement.


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  #22 (permalink)  
Old 11-27-2014, 02:48 PM
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[QUOTE=Pursuinghappiness;186509]

lol...What connection does this have to her supposed mental illness? Being gay, lesbian, transgendered, etc is not a mental disorder. That was actually pretty offensive and bigoted.



the child in question has ADHD, ADD Depression-- they are the reason that has pushed her choice to be wanting to become a man.
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  #23 (permalink)  
Old 11-27-2014, 02:51 PM
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"Yes her mother is a Hoarder. And her sisters daughter is a now cross gender man/woman.:

Hoarding is a mental illness as well as the child in question... I was asked if mental illness was genetic .. SO-- yes is the answer-- in her family
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  #24 (permalink)  
Old 11-27-2014, 02:59 PM
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[QUOTE=Mittzu;186529]
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pursuinghappiness View Post

lol...What connection does this have to her supposed mental illness? Being gay, lesbian, transgendered, etc is not a mental disorder. That was actually pretty offensive and bigoted.



the child in question has ADHD, ADD Depression-- they are the reason that has pushed her choice to be wanting to become a man.



Thanks for clarifying. I've never heard of ADHD and Depression being associated with causing someone to want to switch genders.

Are you actually hearing this from a medical professional or just voicing your own opinions?

Usually, those undergoing gender transition develop depression due to the stress of the change, and the reactions of people that clearly don't understand what they're going through.

I still struggling to understand the transgendered persons connection to your son, and how they are contributing to the problems.
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  #25 (permalink)  
Old 11-27-2014, 03:09 PM
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[QUOTE=Straittohell;186532]
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Originally Posted by Mittzu View Post


I still struggling to understand the transgendered persons connection to your son, and how they are contributing to the problems.


It has nothing to do with our son and what hes going through-- ZERO. I was asked if mental illness ran in the family-- SO, I used the two main people directly related to my ex, that she spends time with our son.

The issues that the child was going through stemmed from the illnesses but YES- their was a lot of things happening around her at the time of her change-

Please--- can we get back to the main post-- I have direct proof that my ex has multiple illness, ( ADHD, Depression, OCD and Dyslexia ) and the patterns in behaviour are escalating into why I am here. I need help -advice on what can I do ..
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  #26 (permalink)  
Old 11-27-2014, 03:12 PM
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[QUOTE=Mittzu;186534]
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It has nothing to do with our son and what hes going through-- ZERO. I was asked if mental illness ran in the family-- SO, I used the two main people directly related to my ex, that she spends time with our son.

The issues that the child was going through stemmed from the illnesses but YES- their was a lot of things happening around her at the time of her change-

Please--- can we get back to the main post-- I have direct proof that my ex has multiple illness, ( ADHD, Depression, OCD and Dyslexia ) and the patterns in behaviour are escalating into why I am here. I need help -advice on what can I do ..
I have a friend whose ex has a documented history of mental illness. It is not easy for it to be proven, documented, and referenced due to privacy concerns. You will need to talk to a proper lawyer to find out how this information would be best utilized by the court to determine a material change.
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  #27 (permalink)  
Old 11-27-2014, 03:19 PM
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After re-reading the thread -- I am thinking I might just take the high road and find her more help and work with her more instead of wasting more energy, time, money and emotion. Maybe I just need to breath, step back and understand that she is struggling, and help her instead of making this worst.
I will find a local mediator and set up a time for the 3 of us to sit down. Work on a written co-parent plan that will help our son. Plus-- I will try and help her with her life, and try and put myself in her shoes ( like I have done so many times) and help.

I am very thankful for all the advice and you have proved to me that this is an amazing site-- THANK YOU
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  #28 (permalink)  
Old 11-27-2014, 03:23 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mittzu View Post
After re-reading the thread -- I am thinking I might just take the high road and find her more help and work with her more instead of wasting more energy, time, money and emotion. Maybe I just need to breath, step back and understand that she is struggling, and help her instead of making this worst.
I will find a local mediator and set up a time for the 3 of us to sit down. Work on a written co-parent plan that will help our son. Plus-- I will try and help her with her life, and try and put myself in her shoes ( like I have done so many times) and help.

I am very thankful for all the advice and you have proved to me that this is an amazing site-- THANK YOU
You're most welcome. I have a lot of empathy for you. My ex and I do well for the most part, but I have days where I struggle a bit with how she acts as well. I just remind myself that I love my kids more than I dislike my ex.
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  #29 (permalink)  
Old 11-27-2014, 03:27 PM
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I love my boy and hate to see him go through this difficult time,

Next steps: thoughts?
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  #30 (permalink)  
Old 11-27-2014, 03:31 PM
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Thoughts? Not much, to be honest. Keep being patient, keep being a force of stability in your son's life. Wash, rinse, and repeat.
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